Trek General /earlgreyhot/ edition

No Trek thread in catalogue

Best ep?
>Inb4 The Inner Light

Also just watched The Final Frontier and feel like killing myself now.

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>Computer, create Trek General
>Disable safety protocols

"Commander, tell me about your sexual organs."

Glad you could join us tonight.

Here's to the finest crew in starfleet

m.youtube.com/watch?v=R2u11CSLcrs

More earl. More grey.

>The Inner Light
His son was actually his son.

That cringe inducing on-stage fight this guy got into with that fat comedian ruined my image of him

>Earl Gray, Hot
If you don't specify that tea is hot does it give it to you room temperature?
Do you have to ask for Ice Cream, Cold?

HOW MUCH FOR THE FEMALE, Sup Forums?

It ceases to be ice cream if it's a liquid

Is this Enterprise? Im watching the pilot and there is this qt vulcan who was assigned to the crew and it looks like her

Definitely in my top 5 trek waifus

>Captain, sensors are detecting a concentration of Type 4 U-wave radiation emanating from the Biggai Nebula.

yup, that's t'pol. the most tsundere vulcan ever seen on star trek.

Same color they are every night.. Yellow, and Green.

>Enterprise
>no shields
>no transporters
>nothing Star Trek

how is this Star Trek

I would totally win that auction.

Christ

>no shields
Wrong

>no transporters
Wrong

>nothing Star Trek
Actually it's the most Star Trek release since the TOS films finished. Your mind is just warped by post-TOS spinoffs.

...

...

...

I've only ever watched the original series all the way through when I was younger. I want to watch TNG because people say its fantastic but I always give up half way through season 1, I assume it gets much better, but at what season does it become fantastic

Season 3

Most fans agree that seasons 1 and 2 of TNG are on the poor side, but that there is a massive upswing in quality starting with season 3. I don't recommend skipping but, if you're going to do it anyway, then skip to season 3.

There are still a few good episodes in the first two seasons though, like "Q Who" and "The Measure of a Man". Watch those. And watch "The Emissary" for plot.

Finally some High res blu ray screenshots!

Checked

that's what the synopsis of the series told me

Try watching it.

One of the flaws is that they share TOO MUCH of the later Star Trek technology. They should have had a lower tech level, without phasers or transporters or "polarized" hull plating (which is exactly the same as shields), but they were afraid of alienating Trekkies like you.

Season 3 is where TNG really comes into its own. There are great episodes in both S1 and S2 though.

>great episodes
>in season 1
Eh... I don't think I would go that far.

...

>be me
>star trek first contact is my fav trek film
>watch the plinkett review
>mfw

ALPHA QUADRANT NIGGA

WE GON FIRE A MAXIMUM SPREAD OF PHOTON TORPEDOS ON YO LITTLE MAQUIS BITCH ASS

Closest I can think is maybe Conspiracy, and even that flies mostly on shock value.
And with modern sensibility, it doesn't fly too good.

I would say The Big Goodbye, but Conspiracy is a personal favorite just because of how unintentionally bizarre it is.

First Contact gets unnecessary hate tbqh

I can understand hating Nemesis or Generations, but First Contact's plot was at least coherent and the process/arc of the story was at least logical

And the acting was better in it than any of the other TNG movies

>You start a conversation with a person, perhaps a friend
>eventually it morphs into dialogue about Star Trek, maybe by mention of the recent reboot movies
>person you are talking to says they are a big star trek fan
>you dont believe them and want to vonfirm your beliefs

QUICK Sup Forums:

What's the first thing you ask them about ST to prove their fandom?

Which federation uniforms are the best and why are they the uniforms from movies 2-5?

My favorite part of Conspiracy is when the aliens' subtle plan for infiltration involves inviting Picard to dinner and hoping he'll just eat a bowl of slugs

Who's your favorite captain?
Natural, common enough, and easy enough to start a dialogue and progress from there.
To the casual fan, Kirk is a womanizing, punch first, ask questions never, cowboy, as opposed to the level headed man he is actually portrayed as

Original Series Films always reign supreme on that front. Followed by First Contact/Late DS9

How many lights are there?

>Patrick Stewart said that he had once made what was considered to be a racist joke on the set of the show. He was confronted by Michael "Worf" Dorn and LeVar "Geordi" Burton who explained that the joke was offensive.

What did he say?

>Computer, tea, earl grey, hot. And for my friend Geordi here, drank, purple, lukewarm

Hot is hotter than the standard tea temperature

Starfleet is, unfortunately, American, and they have a habit of serving tea as a tea bag in tepid water, and it's disgusting. A true Brit, I mean Frog, like Picard would want his water just under boiling. Hot.

>and computer, 1 concrete slab so Geordi can pour...what was it Mr. LaForge?
>pour one out for my homie. sir
>What the darkie said computer, I refuse to repeat that.

>Best ep?
Thine Own Self

Worst ep?
Watched this shit today while eating a shitty dinner.
Something about this episode is so banal, all the acting is not even bad in an entertaining way, it's just flat and belaboured.
This smug fuck sucks at pretending.

The most easy is ask them where Picard is from. If they say he is english, they aren't trekkies
A harder one is "Tom Paris from Voyager was under deep cover, what was his real name?" This is manifold, they need to have seen a wesley focused TNG episode and suffered VOY in any capacity to understand the question.

>Computer, belay that
>Add exception "Keynesian debt modifiers", using rudimentary physics, create fractional reserve system for this Trek General
>.................DISABLETHESAFETYPROTOCOLS

*nods approvingly*

...

Blubber Corden deserves it, the right cunt.
This song makes me feel coked up like that night at the Risian disco-tech-noir.

>literally quizzing them
maybe a more subtle approach would be better.

Before she went off the deep end, she was a rather beauté.

That's pretty autistic dude.

Remove Bajoran.

>Computer, create a perfect copy of one Counselor Diana Troy

>Perfect computer, except for one thing...

>Computer......can you give "Diana" a penis? An uncomfortably large one?

>Keep her clothes on, I want to see the bulge.

>Yes, good, but make it larger. Larger still. Computer please, even larger. Yes thats perfect.

>Computer, lock the doors, I am not to be disturbed.

>Disengage safety protocols.

>Finally some High res blu ray screenshots!

Trips confirm, Voyager will see Blu-Ray before we all die!

Vulcan>Ferengi>Klingon>Cardassian>Romulan>Bajoran

>First Contacts plot
>Coherent
>COHERENT

Damn, do you have the entire franchise at the ready?!

I really need to get on your level, mate.

I fucking hate Inner Light so much. So poorly executed from beginning to end. Shallow as fuck characters, a non twist that was revealed at the start and cheap, canned drama. Why did we get told about him finding his daughter running away instead of actually seeing it happen? Are we supposed to care for his fat friend when he shows up in one scene and is already dead the next?

I know it sounds contrarian but it really feels like Inner Light was written by children who don't understand how to craft proper drama. Take any random DS9 episode and it probably does a better job of it, let alone something like the Visitor.

I never liked Dax. In all seven seasons, am I alone in this?

Loved Major Kira though, save all her Bajoran cultural episodes, any of those fucking Bajoran centric episodes sucked unless it was abut the Occupation.

I don't do shit tests or gate keeping I just talk to them like a normal human being, and if they have only seen some of the shows that's OK, I'll bond with them over the ones they have seen and encourage them to watch more.

>Computer, pull from archive Screaming Hamburgler program, kill on sight setting
>Computer, generate famous earth painter Bob Ross, face paint mode, apply bushes with extreme predudice, have genitalia increase by 20% with each application, password Titanium White.
>Computer, summon Worf to holodeck, lockdown, disable safety protocols

I'm NOT the CAP..tain.
>but I COULD be

I loved Dax but Dax centered episodes were the worst.

Most of the Bajoran episodes I thought were pretty good, with a few stinkers. Like the one where Kira plays nurse to the fat fuck on the moon.

Are you retarded? By that point they weren't going to let him go and were going to put the slug in his ear. They had guards posted at the door. No, seriously, are you fucking stupid?

Ask him to solve this simple math problem.

Source on this? Patrick doesn't seem like that kind of guy

>My favorite part of Conspiracy is when the aliens' subtle plan for infiltration involves inviting Picard to dinner and hoping he'll just eat a bowl of slugs

Yeah, the parasites were so insidious and deceptive except on understanding the cuisine of their target race.

>Let's just serve them grub worms
>Damnit, Blarnok, they aren't the Ferengi!

>Everyone always says Riker is a pussy destroyer
>Actually watch TNG
>Troi literally fucks every single strange dick she meets on the show
Hmmmmmm

It's called the Pogo paradox
>time jump: past
>event occurs in the past
>event causes original time jump

VOY Season 5, Episode 24 "Relativity"

Please don't post the picture. My heart can't handle it.

NEVER EVER

He called Cardassians spoonheads

I think I just saw this one, what episode is this?

I need that webm of Odo mixing a bowl because cute.

>at some point in time a Trill decided to shove a strange slug from a swap inside his ass, and then when he died some other dude took his slug and put it inside himself and discovered that memories transferred over with the slug

>and thus began the proud tradition of trill symbiosis

That's not what I'm talking about you mouth breather.

Why did the Borg go back to first contact? Why didn't they just go back to 10,000bc and assimilate everyone then?

Why did they just send one ship? Why not like 200?

Why does Picard suddenly hate the Borg and become a stone cold fucker when he showed prior sympathy towards them?

I can keep going all day.

Anyone have a confirmed Troi fuck count?
These are all the ones I can think of off the top:
~Riker
~Worf
~Random Ensign in TurboLift from "Violations"
~Devinoni Ral (aka 1/4 betazoid with the dumb voice bargaining for the wormhole
~Le Master Diplomat Guy from Masterpiece Society

I know there is way more but that's the most I can think of right off the top. Did she fuck Barclay?

Favorite episode of each series:

TOS - A Piece of the Action
TNG - Darmok
DS9 - Inter Arma Enim Silent Leges
VOY - Living Witness
ENT - In a Mirror, Darkly

>That's not what I'm talking about you mouth breather.

Calm down, my child

They didn't do all that because the writers can't be hamstrung by your literal autism and generalized anger at everything around you.

Laughing at your need for continuity in a universe that has magitek and chaos Gods.

VOY - Threshold
nothing else matter tbqh

>Why does Picard suddenly hate the Borg and become a stone cold fucker when he showed prior sympathy towards them?

Picard hated the Borg, then became half and half on the Borg when Hugh and gang showed up, later regretted but lived with it, then went full Ahab in First Contact since they tried again.
Of all the questions, that one actually has an answer
And if you are going to ask those types of questions about FC, why not ask a bunch about Best of Both Worlds?
Borg send a single cube that wrecks all of Starfleet and Data's connection to their network saves Earth.
All they needed was two ships.

Just TOS, TNG and DS9

Piracy laws basically don't exist here, it's really comfy.

Gotta separate the wheat from the chaff.

>writers shouldn't bother trying to write solid, sound stories because internet kiddies will always willingly jump to defend the plot holes
You learn something new every day.

A Piece of the Action is a great choice.

>Gotta separate the wheat from the chaff.
Thanks Wesker

>Why did they just send one ship? Why not like 200?
One Borg ship could wipe out its targets on a pre-warp earth with ease, especially an earth that's just experienced a crippling nuclear world war. Really not that hard to figure out.

>Why does Picard suddenly hate the Borg and become a stone cold fucker when he showed prior sympathy towards them?
I'd be a stone cold fucker if unstoppable malicious drones were slowly taking over my ship, assimilating my crew, messing with my head, and threatening the entire course of future history.
I mean, his "the line must be drawn here" speech explains the whole thing".
Next time pay attention to a movie when you watch it.

>Why did they just send one ship? Why not like 200?
because one was enough
>Why does Picard suddenly hate the Borg and become a stone cold fucker when he showed prior sympathy towards them?
he was under stress and having to save both the ship and humanity, it brought back all the hate he had

>What's the first thing you ask them...
>literally quizzing them is too much
Its literally what user asked for. A non-question is just reply with "Kaplah" when you leave instead of bye and see what their response is.

>Piracy laws basically don't exist here, it's really comfy.

Lucky bastard.

I live here. Copyright infringement is capital punishment.

It's a bulbous and crude organ Soren. One that can both give and recieve great pleasure. I once urinated once on targana 9. I pulled out my loins and immediately felt a breeze that could only be described as sublime. The air caressed my scrotum in a manner that I had never felt before. The warm breeze of the targani air engorged my penis beyond a measure that I had not experienced even during intercourse. Perhaps it would be easier if I simply showed you. *unzips dick*

oh you silly vegetable

First Contact is easily the best TNG film by a long way, and I wouldn't hold it against you for it being your favourite, but there's a lot of TOS films which are better, any of these are valid picks: 1, 2, 4, 6

One Borg ship was not enough for the 24th century. Why not send two? Is three too many for the Borg to spare?

If they were always planning to assimilate the past, why not travel to the past FIRST and then travel to Earth? That way the Enterprise can't follow them.

Oh, it's their backup plan? Why? Why isn't their backup plan just sending a second cube?

>A Piece of the Action is a great choice.
We need a Fizbin general over on board games.