Go to cinema

>go to cinema
>cinema sushi chef is clearly Korean

>go to cinema
>crab leg vending machine is out of order

>go to cinema
>cinema sushi chef is Mexican

>implying you can tell the difference between a Korean, Jap, Chinese or other asian

You can tell it's a korean if you ask it if it's korean and it says yes.

you can tell it's japanese if you ask if it's korean and it goes nuclear.

>tfw the sauna section is closed for repairs

>tfw have to clear the popcorn mines of corn bats

I hated that job, i'm glad I got promoted to the butter bee farms

it isn't hard dude

>Crab leg vending machine works
>No butter

Why live?

real story
>Apply at local Sushi shop for front of house job
>"sorry user, we only employ Japanese people at our authentic sushi house"
>Fair enough, dishonesty is really killing the sushi industry
>As i'm leaving, see a Korean guy i know from Primary school
>mfw he's in uniform
>mfw he's working front of house
did you kn-know the Japanese are r-really racist

Why is this a thing? Like I've heard it multiple times but why do the Japanese hate Koreans other than that the Japanese hate most non-Japanese anyway

>why do the Japanese hate Koreans
There's been multiple wars

>Go to cinema
>Brought my government issued single license
>Ticket guy is a bit skeptical, lets mein after a quick full body patdown by the resident TSA agent
>Go to cinema swimming pool while I wait for previews to end
>Pool is literally yellow from all the buttered popcorn people bring in and probably piss too
>Hit up the jacuzzi instead
>as I'm about to sit down a 10otta10 approaches me
>"Hey what's up? You come here with your girlfriend?"
>"Uh no I came here by myself haha"
>Her expression changes from mild amusment to steady fear
>"Oh haha don't worry I have a license"
>Start patting my pockets for my wallet
>Can't find it
>Being next to qt and fondling my pants starts to give me a stiffy
>Realize I don't even have pockets because I'm wearing swim trunks
>Distract her with my smooth conversation skills as I try to tuck my johnson
>Fail a speech check, qt notices me fiddling around with something long in my pants
>"He's got a gun!"
>Qt rund away
>Everyone evacuates the swimming pool
>Cops bust through the door
>Get shot
>Pay $100,000 in medical fees
>Mfw got my single license revoked
>Mfw missed the movie
>Mfw didn't get to use the jacuzzi

>Hear on news local cinema is about to go under
>can't even afford to pay the theater shooter, who gets most of his wages from tips
>Grab my AR-15 assault pistol and head out to save the theater
>Even pay for a ticket to get in
>Go into theater playing zootopia and open fire
>Crowd seems mostly pleased, I managed to hit several children which is impressive because they're small targets in a dark room
>Security escorts me saying unauthorized shootings aren't allowed
>Banned for life

>day I have been dreaming of arrives
>Kinoplex Republic hires me as their kino gunman
>first day on the job i'm so giddy im shaking
>grab my M4 and head to the theater
>just on time as the movie intermission begins so i can make my move
>so excited I had forgotten to load my gun
>reaching for my ammunition startles one of the falcons
>starts flapping in my face and getting in the fucking way
>open fire with this thing fucking clawing my shit apart
>manage to actually hit a few people
>finish off my magazine and head home
>phone rings, boss wants to see me
>uh oh
>"user we're letting you go"
>but what did I do wrong?
>"you did a superb job however there was one problem"
>"you managed to hit quite a few people, but you accidentally mortally wounded one of them and they ended up dying"
>lose my job, have to pay funeral expenses

Fuck, my only shot was ruined because some dumb faggot couldn't survive a gunshot

Sounds like you have grounds for a lawsuit to be honest family

kek'd

This "No singles policy" is just a meme right? America doesn't actually do this?

And what about crab legs, are they a meme too? I thought seafood would stink up the place too much for cinemas to consider it

>tfw no crab legs

Never seen crab legs. Seen no singles policy before in California.

Crab legs and wine are served at the cinema at my place, the no singles policy only applies to those under 40, afterwards they consider the possibility that you might be widowed so they don't card you.

That's crazy though, how can they pretend it's anything but discrimination?

its private property they can do whatever is best for their business.

They think disgruntled gunmen are going to be taking out their Hollywood frustrations against audiences?

Everything is right with the world

That and once they find out you are single they make you walk through the hall of shame where normies waiting to enter the theatre can laugh at you. It really improves attendance.

people bitch about farm duty bit ive always found butter bees kind of cute desu

>go to local kinoplex
>movie about to start
>theres a surprise kinoexam
>didn't study for it and fail it
>get brutally kicked in the face by security while they're escorting me out
>feeling the loss of consciousness
>ears start bleeding as well
>luckily i snuck a dagger in and stabbed one of em in the neck, severing his jugular
>as the other guard draws his gun i throw the dagger at his forehead
>manages to get one shot out hitting me in the calf
>limp my way out as fast as i could before the kino republic army shows up
>barely make it out alive
>walk toward car
>cant fing my keys
>realized i left em in the kino key hangers
>mfw

Chinese last name is 1 syllable, Korean is 2 and japanese is 3

Too bad if you get stung you get clogged arteries

>Kim

>sato

literally the most common name in japan.