How the fuck did something as boring as soccer become so big?

How the fuck did something as boring as soccer become so big?

Other urls found in this thread:

outsports.com/2012/2/1/4052496/football-as-a-homoerotic-ritual-are-players-really-gay
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_David_Kopay_Story
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Shit taste m8

No u

tbf you have to have a very high iq to understand football

>he doesn't watch divegrass

Poverty

I already understand football. The one actually fun to watch.

Just like why people wonder why baseball has 162 fucking games. Back when it was created there was very little to do entertainment wise.

Honestly soccer players are like twigs... They fall over and have to call in a stretcher over the smallest things

its called povertyball for a reason

I started watching soccer cuz I liked the drama during the 06 World Cup, whether it was that usa sucked ass even against shitty teams, Mexico's inevitable ass blasting by Argentina, or, of course, France's collapse in the finals
Then the next year I got into EPL even though, at the time, you had to pay for matches on PPV cuz there was no broadcasting rights in America
You just have to be in the right mindset
I dunno how Mexican fans can follow soccer for like 48 weeks out of the year

Because its simple to play as a kid and the tactics get exponentially higher as you age. Similar principle to basketball

Also, because its povertyball.

There's nothing more empowering and alpha then being being in a third world shit hole and making it out of your war-torn country through athleticism and skill

So why are you still stuck in Australia?

literally would not want to visit your shithole of a country let alone live in it

maximum jej

Lowest common denominator

rekt

because it's the only game of consequence that comes prepackaged with nationalism. fans are fans of their country, not the sport itself. if any of America's big sports went worldwide and had half as much money no one would watch soccer again.

Forced acculturation through colonization

holy shit nigga

>Fun to watch
>Commerical breaks every 3 minutes

Kek

art

Because it's so boring so you must fight with other fans right in the stadium. Self-entertaining sport.
Oh, and you can launder money by buying clubs.

try read more of Michel Foucault's books to stop yourself from asking these questions over and over again.

>Handegg
>15 minutes of men running into each other, throwing around a ball and flopping to the floor
>2 and a half hours of commercials, standing around, talking and number crunching for the rest of it.
>Divegrass is the boring game

What is it with Amerisharts and their autistic need to bitch about football every single day? You don't even see other nationalities bitch about amerishart kike sports in their own circle jerk threads yet they're absolutely and unironically asspained about football to the point that they need to tell everyone how gay it is since there's not enough giganiggers ramming each other like animals. I mean, are they angry that no one cares outside their inbred continental shithole about their nigger bread and circuses or are they still upset about their uppity niggers kneeling and laughing at their joke country?

The same way something as boring as luckswing got so big in the US

top kek

Goals started looking really cool once the athletes got better. Same thing with slam dunks and the 3-pointer in basketball

LMAO. soccer fags can never post on Sup Forums again after this. /suc/ needs to happen asap

Baseball is the best sport. Only ADHD-riddled wiggers who got entranced by rap """music""" consisting of ooga booga muh dik don't like it.

It isn't coincidence that America at its height (40s-50s) most enjoyed baseball, and that football and apehoop became more popular in the late 60s onward (America's downfall).

It's a sport for the braindead. It's accessibility is why literally everyone living in one of those 10-cents-a-day, UN crisis zone third world countries plays the sport.

You alright champ? Don't be upset no one enjoys your shit sport, just remember Sup Forums is an american sports board and be grateful we allow you to post here out of the kindness and generosity of our hearts.

Being teased and made fun of every day is part of the deal, get used to it.

All sports follow the same pattern

tribalism + unknown outcome

It's not about the sport itself. It's about wearing the same symbol as everyone around you and being part of something. This combined with random outcomes makes it interesting.

Reported to ICE

>american
>complaining about other sports being for the braindead
>meanwhile, his most popular sport is concussion egg

>this whole entire thread

>Sup Forums is an american sports board
Your irrelevant sports dont even last long enough year round to make that claim true. Just how retarded are you niggers?

They didn't have anything else to play. It's absurdly cheap to play compared to more complex sports. All you need is a ball to kick around.

Then why do your poverty niggers and spics pick up apecollide, boreball and monkeybasket so easily?

Rugby Union is the superior team sport

>everyone living in one of those 10-cents-a-day, UN crisis zone third world countries plays the sport

kek

There is quite a difference between being poor in america and being a poor third world shitskin, user. Come on now.

>le poor argument
>le 4D chess game
Ameriniggers, everyone.

Because Jews force the white man to pay taxes to the public (((school))) system to subsidize Tyrone's apehoop and obesecollide costs, just like we also have to pay for your 300 pound burrito mother to shit out 8 kids

>what are clubs

>dude poor in america is like rich elsewhere
Not only are amerisharts delusional about their kike nigger sports, they also think they're well off.

Appeals to the lowest common denominator and since the vast majority of the world is so hilariously poor it brings tears to my eyes this is the result

>that filename
sublime kek

I like divegrass and luckswing equally for this reason. The visible execution of tactics. I guess football has it too but the NFL itself has always been just unbearable to watch

>americans literally sit through three hours of ads to watch five minutes of lycra-cladd niggers with helmets and armor run into each other and call it a "sport"

>being retarded enough to brag about being a taxpaying cuck subsidizing billionaire pet projects that niggers and spics take advantage off.
You just keep embarrassing yourselves, lads.

A nigger in camden can still play a real sport with the resources of the area he lives in... A shitskin in Argentina, the UK or any other third world country? Well they're so poor of course the only thing to do is to kick a ball around and pretend something is actually happening... That is all they know. Really sad when you think about it actually.

All sports are for poor people.

The best countries in the sport are Germany, France, Italy, Spain, and Argentina

>being so poor you don't pay taxes

The rest of the world just isn't gay for your niggers
outsports.com/2012/2/1/4052496/football-as-a-homoerotic-ritual-are-players-really-gay

Because Americans are rich and yuropoors are destitute. We have the funds to build facilities to accommodate these sports.

No worries. I game the system so I pay no taxes and don't have to subsidize you and your subhuman ilk :^)

Google Liberia slums and understand that is the direct genetic lineage of who made those Camden houses look like that. Only so much welfare gibs can do. I can plow $100k into my dog going to college. Probably isn't going to work out too well.

Not surprising that terrorist harboring acid thrower countries are in that list

If it's a retriever or border collie it will probably outperform 70% of NCAA """student"""-athletes

lol

...

I agree, leftists are violent, deranged people. They are the most frequent perpetrators of mass shootings and should not be extended second amendment rights like normal people.

>country music white trash subhumans
Bless you, Paddock.

Easy to pick up and play.

The only good amerinigger is a dead one.

How come soccer players usually gay? Like what is with that. So many of them are obvious flaming homosexuals. What is it about dancing around a ball doing nothing for 90 minutes that attracts these type of people?

name a gay soccer player

Soccer playing countries themselves are far more predisposed to homosexuality already. Look at South Americans for instance.

Why are you faggots obsessed with homos?

>Scene_of_life_in_Marseille, France_sR10000922728eWakEAD39CF.jpg

I don't know any, I just know the lot of them are gay from all the pictures you guys spam here. I mean its incredibly obvious, what kind of straight man would spend as much time on their hair as soccer fags do? Who do they think they are kidding..?

in other words, you're just following the crowd?

>The whole language of football is involved in sexual allusions. We were told to go out and "fuck those guys"; to take that ball and stick it up their asses"or "down their throats."The coaches would yell,"knock their dicks off," or more often than that,"knock their jocks off." They'd say,"Go out there and give it all you've got,a hundred and ten percent, shoot your wad. You controlled their line and "knocked" 'em into submission. Over the years I've seen many a coach get emotionally aroused while he was diagramming a particular play into an imaginary hole on the blackboard. His face red, his voice rising, he would show the ball carrier how he wanted him to" stick it in the hole."
>Some of my favorites from Dundes' paper (you can read the whole thing here):
>The object of the game, simply stated, is to get into the opponent's end zone while preventing the opponent from getting into one's own end zone. ... We can now better understand the appropriateness of the "bottom patting" so often observed among football players. A good offensive or defensive play deserves a pat on the rear end. The recipient has held up his end and has thereby helped protect the collective "end" of the entire team. One pats one's teammates' ends, but one seeks to violate the end zone of one's opponents! ...

Holy shit pls nuke this thread

Utter utter /poleddit/ garbage. Fucking sage

>The trust one has for one's own teammates is perhaps signaled by the common postural stance of football players. The so-called three-point stance involves bending over in a distinct stooped position with one's rear end exposed. It is an unusual position and it does make one especially vulnerable to attack from behind, that is,vulnerable to a homosexual attack. ... Since one can trust one's teammates, one knows that one will be patted, not raped. "Both tight end and split end could easily be understood as possessing an erotic nuance."
>The sexual connotations of football folk speech apply equally to players on defense. One goal of the defensive line is to penetrate the offensive line to get to the quarterback. Getting to the quarterback and bringing him down to the ground is termed "sacking" the quarterback. The verb "sack" connotes plunder, ravage, and perhaps even rape.
>Thus in the beginning of the football game, we have two sets or teams of males. By the end of the game, one of the teams is "on top," namely the one which has "scored" most by getting into the other team's "end zone." The losing team, if the scoring differential is great, maybe said to have been "creamed."
>I think it is highly likely that the ritual aspect of football, providing as it does a socially sanctioned framework for male body contact ... is a form of homosexual behavior. The unequivocal sexual symbolism of the game, as plainly evidenced in folk speech coupled with the fact that all of the participants are male, make it difficult to draw any other conclusion. Sexual acts carried out in thinly disguised symbolic form by,and directed towards, males and males only,would seem to constitute ritual homosexuality.

>McGeography
Not even once

not yet. Its entertaining to rile up 3rd world shitskins with 2 AM baitposts

it was what the elites invested in to watch poor people run around like baffoons in a giant open field, for their entertainment

the MVP award is literally called the baffoon d'or or some shit

it basically replaced their slavery glory days of when nigger torture was the best and nost entertaining sport

>How come soccer players are gay?
Amerishart literally can't stop thinking about homos. The absolute state of Americucks

You know what the funniest thing about soccer fags are?

The lengths they will go to deny how boring their sport is. Like its one thing to accept that your sport is universally laughed at on the world stage, but to try and deny how boring it is...LMAO. NOTHING HAPPENS !

On the rare occasion a goal is actually scored, what happens? An over celebration. It was a miracle!! Someone scored !!! hallelujah!! It's hilarious and sad at the same time. I mean it must be an absolute treat for you guys when more than 2 goals are scored... no wonder you guys go absolutely bonkers when there is a blowout, you don't even know what to do with yourselves after that much happening in 90 minutes. It's like the highlight of your lives. Utterly hilarious.

>the MVP award is literally called the baffoon d'or

>STOP LIKING WHAT I DON'T LIKE

>I am shitposting in 2 AM
I honestly pity you virgins.

Fuck the yuro cocksucking that goes on here, but they are right that you're all terrible at banter. Every post here is cringy as fuck

Where did you find CR7's journal?

...

...

What made you decide to actually post this?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_David_Kopay_Story
Literally and unironically written by your fellow Amerihomosexual.

this desu, especially Nordics and Germans. Extremely unfunny and pathetic

>that post
>that flag

>flag
So are you a yurofag on vacation or a bean awaiting deportation?

actually laughed despite hating this thread

>at least two autistic assdevastated Amerisharts are samefagging replies and reactions with their fellow Amerigayrightsactivists to try to force a reaction.
Very contrived. Sad!

>le cucked american maymay11!1