If you owned a movie theater, what sort of food would you serve? Me? I'd serve crab legs

If you owned a movie theater, what sort of food would you serve? Me? I'd serve crab legs.

Bored, cloister?

No wonder. Wew...

catched

Me personally?

Broiled falcon breast

Roasted elephant hooves

I would have all you can eat stew and chowder bar.

I would encourage the clientele to arrive at least 2 hours earlier and help themselves to our always ready friers, they may buy any of the product we offer or pay a fee to bring outside produce!

POPCORN
OF COURSE
I can't imagine anything else to serve

Falcon Caesar Salad

But the cracking of the shells would disturb people watching the movie. Did you even think of that before you posted this? Dumb.

My MEW thread gets deleted but the janny lets these shitty meme threads perpetuate. Fucking faggot get away from the microwave for a second and close your gaping hotpocket maw.

I'd only allow people who browse Sup Forums to come to my theater, and I'd sell boxes of Almond Joy bites with a cyanide capsule mixed in with the candy.

based cloisterposter

For me it is the McChicken, the best fast food sandwich

i would have cinema sex slaves

ELEPHANTS DON'T HAVE HOOVES YOU FUCKING MONGOLOID!!!!!!!!!!!!

OUT OF MY THEATER!!!!!

>Me? I'd serve crab legs.

Are you fucking retarded? Why would anybody want to eat crab legs in the movie theater? For one, they smell. For two, they're loud and hard to eat. What do you do with the shells when you're done? Throw them on the ground? What if someone has to walk past you in the aisle, do they just crunch crab legs underneath their feet?

This is honestly the dumbest thing I've read all day, you should strongly consider suicide.

AHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
YOUR fUCKING RETARDED M8
AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Delete this right now.

I would unironically have a couples only policy with mandated penis inspections for every chic flic and then if the guy is below 7" we would offer her a premium BigBlackDick(TM) Dildo for only $39.99 so that she can actually get off during the film.

Of course to compensate we would also mandate that any man that fell below that 7" mark must stay after the film and clean up the theater before the next film since it is his own fault he cannot take his girl home and please her there.

Only soup, nothing else.

When the local kino tribe roasts their pig in the adjoining kinoplex and a starving rival tribe attacks them, disturbing your viewing please through tribal warfare-induced noise emission in the process

Based Corn Dogs

>that'll be $499.95 plus tip

organic free trade gluten free ostrich eggs for me

>Pour lots of random cheap food over each other and stack it up
>mexishit """cuisine""" in a nutshell

no food. anyone eating during a movie needs to be gassed

>arrive at kinoplex early to square up the kinodiles for wrestling to decide my seat
>chump in front of me didn't purchase the $39.99 cinemasteak to distract his kinodile
>it eats his falconlet as it tries to attack
>he gets taken away to the theatre mines to serve his sentence
>my turn
>kinodile is still full from the chump's falconlet
>only takes about 10 minutes to wrestle because full stomach
>minor scarring
>proceed to cinema hospital with spare $39.99 cinema steak and enough time to finish mandatory 25 minutes of Blacked porn viewing due to singles policy
>reach cinema with time to spare
>still next to the fucking apiary

Every FUCKING time.

Prime rib sandwiches with Au Jus dip.

Based cloister working the fat reddit virgins.

sauteed onions and mushrooms for $1 extra

Spicy refried beans. Grilled onions. Sixty-six kinds of cheese. Hard crunchy candy coated in chocolate that quickly melts even on room temperature. Extra carbonated energy drinks. Organic water. Crab juice.

lobster bisque

Rocky mountain oysters

tendies

what's the dipping sauce though?

ketchup

I'd probably serve biscuits and sausage gravy.

ID SERVE THE BIG DOG, it would only cost (one) (spear)

Everyone would get a complimentary onion

kys

>amerifats actually eat vomit

lsd

Crab legs! That's a good one op! Because crab legs would be very difficult and distracting to consume in a dark movie theater. LOL!

Nice Hitler dubs

But I was watching the Travel channel a long time ago and they were showing this place in New England where they literally give you this huge bucket of fried seafood with corn on the cob and biscuits for like eight dollars, I would serve that

lurk more newfag

new pasta

this
but don't tell them, just put it in the coca cola
>An Unforgettable Movie Experience

what drink is this

what's a newfag

cu/ck/

Mew a shit waifu

>new

Mew?

Carbino Overcharge III

It's a Rum Martinez as made by Takumi Watanabe of the Sail Bar in Tokyo

I would exclusively serve fried cockroach antenna, drizzled with cockroach fluid.

However many bushels of wheat a person wishes. It has so many uses and they look good to boot!

I fucking absolutely love prime rib dips. Pour a nice and thick demi glaze over it when cooking, sauteed mushrooms and onions with gouda cheese.

Oh baby.

>dumb communist who never had glorious gravy

>when you're at the local kinematografotoriumory to see the latest Pixar film when the parent and child sitting next to you disturb your viewing pleasure with slightly louder than appropriate noise violating the NAP thanks to the theater recently implementing the an-cap policy, so you shoot the father and take his bloodsoaked popcorn for yourself and claim the child as your slave

my man

Shrimp and cocktail sauce pls

i got banned for crab legs posting on /ck/ a few weeks ago

How?
Isn't /ck/ flooded with spam that nobody does anything about like every half an hour?

should have been permaban

i don't think so. the thread was about bad dining experiences and i posted
>yeah, when i went to see suicide squad my i was inadvertantly making a ton of noise while cracking my crab legs, so much so that someone got the usher to hold me at gun point until i quieted down. when he saw that i was alone, he shot me in my knees and dragged me out of the theatre for violating the no singles policy.
and got banned for a day for violating GR3

None

I would serve hard dehydrated Super Noodles

>enter the kinodrome 1000 AD
>choose between berry picker ticket or hunter ticket
>berry pickers are seated next to bushes and trees carrying fruit
>hunter are seated in a forested theater with and given a bow or spear, and may hunt for wild boars that roam the kinowoods if they are hungry

For me, it's fried koala tendons.

mods there are cucks

why would you ever buy the hunter-gatherer ticket? i would love to just sit next to a berry bush and watch a lion fight some gladiators.

>"Oh that's so sweet user, but I'd rather go to the movies with Chad, he's gonna kill a boar for me, he's so manly"

Bacon with sriracha mayo dip

Me? I'd generate my revenue from a streamlined synergistic profit flow of multiple Advanced Profit Systems.... simple, eh?

$20 - Disney's Roasted Falcon Chow (TM), A Disney Snack
$50 - Penalty Fee incurred if you are found to be eating Roasted Falcon Chow yourself, instead of feeding it to your falcon

$25 - Cost to Rent an Anvil
$80 - Recommended Tip to Bribe Usher to get past the No Singles Policy.
$70 - Convenience Fee to use the cinema shower system (showers are mandatory)
$20 - Recommended Tip for the 1st Intermission's Professional Penis Inspector
$20 - Recommended Tip for the 2nd Intermission's Dance Instructor
$20 - Recommended Tip for the Crab Boy (The Boy who collects discarded Crab Legs during the 2nd Intermissions Mandatory Interpretative Dance)

All Tips are mandatory. If tipping is below the recommended level, the penis inspection will be held in front of the entire audience, and the offending patron must perform an extended edition of their Interpretive Dance solo, immeadiately after their Penis Inspection. A possible 2nd Penis Inspection may take place after their dance performance.


Other mandatory sources of tipping
:
Tipping the cinema presenter (The cinema presenter is a valued member of our team who pauses the film when a new actor or actress appears on screen, and recites the actor's entire IMDB page, in order to familiarize the audience with the actor's body of work)
Tipping each usher
Tipping the theater's Anvil Lord
Tipping the theater's Falconer

Elementary, really....

We /ck/ now

In my country, they serve hot dogs
It's pretty great actually. I can wolf it down during the ads and then sneak out to the bathroom and back before the film starts

>Au Jus
You fucking nazi

I would serve pizza hawai