Kong Skull Island Reviews

Embargo just lifted

>1/5 stars

JUST

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google.com/amp/variety.com/2017/film/reviews/kong-skull-island-review-1202000823/amp/
google.com/amp/www.hollywoodreporter.com/amp/review/kong-skull-island-review-982156
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trailer looked pish anyways.

king kong as a property is so unbelievably dated it just seems sad trying to make it into some sort of edgy action flick that you can market to the young adult demo. say what you will about Jackson's version, at least he had the right idea to take an almost whimsical approach to something so far-fetched.

The trailer looked like total shit. I got fucking bored watching a fucking trailer.

When they said that skull quip I just turned it off. What a fucking joke.

It's a good thing I don't need to watch this because they've already released 8 different trailers, a few full scenes, and the post credit scene before the movie even came out.

...Anonymous
03/02/17(Thu)17:25:00 No.79996031
trailer looked pish anyways.

Marvel and DC as a property is so unbelievably dated it just seems sad trying to make it into some sort of edgy action flick that you can market to the young adult demo. say what you will about Raimi's version, at least he had the right idea to take an almost whimsical approach to something so far-fetched.

And WB fucks up again

Honestly, the sooner AT&T shuts them down the better

universal you dumb cunt

Check again

Pretty much everyone thought it looked like warm shite anyway.

Honestly, I never heard a single cunt who wanted to see this.

Will clean up at the razzies no doubt.

How nu r u

Why hasn't Hiddleston paid to have his hairline fixed?

Same as Henry Cavill and Jude Law

And yet, this bomb won't hurt Sam Jackson's Box Office pull one bit.

The next fucking pile of shit he's in will immediately peak people's interest.

>Oh it's got Samuel L Jackson in it.

How the fuck?

This nigger is pushing Donald Sutherland levels of Good/Bad film ratio right now.

No one gives a fuck about Kong in any context. Justice League or Wonder Woman will win the razzies. Maybe Stephen Kings IT since "le creepy book accurate clown makes me cringe" "muh tv miniseries"

m.ign.com/articles/2017/03/02/kong-skull-island-review
google.com/amp/variety.com/2017/film/reviews/kong-skull-island-review-1202000823/amp/
google.com/amp/www.hollywoodreporter.com/amp/review/kong-skull-island-review-982156
I'm getting mixed signals here.

>Tom Hiddlestone's talents
>Tom Hiddlestone
>talent

what

It's because people like him. If you're a likeable actor you can do as much shit as you please.

>This entire year will be filled with flops

Haha

>peak

go back to school

I know how you love your tomatoes, Sup Forums. My guess is a 60% at the lowest.

The first thing you got wrong was reading IGN.

Seriously, they have proven time and time again to be utter charlatans

50% at the highest lotta rotten reviews about to come in each one will knock of about 5%

Jesus I thought the drone thing was just a meme. What is happening to ppl

Scotsman detected

Do you morons actually believe it's impossible for ppl to like what you dont? Broad claims you always here like "no one cares about this" is the biggest fallacy tossed around here. Because you don't know anyone doesn't ppl out there aren't interested

>trusting the guardian

Nobody can deliver words like 'PISH' or 'SHITE' with the kind of panache that a Scotsman can.

what of it

APOLOGIZE

Jesus fucking Christ. So the Pacific Rim series is the only hope for the Kaiju movies? And Rim is damn near a fucking satire of the genre. Come the fuck on, Hollywood.

>this is what passes for journalism in 2017
Fug.
>Why I won't date another 'male feminist'
I guess it's not all bad. This Kate lady has a no nu-male policy.

Now apply this to all modern Marvel capeshit

You sound like one pretentious faggot

Waiting for Armond's review.

Did you idiots really expect this movie to be anything other than complete garbage?

Sup Forums is so pathetically contrarian that it salivates over any and everything tasteless, tacky, cheesy, and over the top simply for stupidity of it alone. You're literally the only group of people that thought the cattle-prod stormtrooper from TFA and Neagen from the TWD are anything other than hammy, over the top cartoon characters that draw you out of the experience because your underaged brains find them amusing

>b-b-but it's fun!

Fuck you.

The 2nd trailer was fucking horrible.

Every time there's tension and a sense of danger it gets quipped to shit.

>You're literally the only group of people that thought the cattle-prod stormtrooper from TFA

Objectively wrong, everyone on the internet loved that guy, he was the best character in the movie.

>Neagen from the TWD are anything other than hammy, over the top cartoon characters that draw you out of the experience because your underaged brains find them amusing
TWD jumped the shark ages ago, right now Negan is saving it from becoming unwatchable. He's hammy as fuck but his hamminess is better than the annoying melodrama that TWD is full of.
>Fuck you.
Suck my cock, you uptight faggot. Negan isn't going anywhere no matter how much you whine.

Normie love Negan and the stormtrooper got a Funko Pop figure.

how the fuck did he get there?

>Giant monster film
>being silly

I don't even think that the film looks good but I don't get what they were expecting on that front.

But I was expecting these kinds of reviews, the tone looked all over the place.

Any review by him, should just be buried under replies of 'Tell that to Zod's snapped neck'.

lol this worthless shit is on rt

wow could rt be any less relevant now holy shit

>Chris Stuckmann of ChrisStuckman.com

I thought I was getting memed but it's actually real.
Fucking hell RT really is a trash aggregator

oh my

No it's to get some black people in.

Full blown proof why Rotten Tomatoes, and movie critics in general, should never be trusted as a credible source.

how can DC even compete?

Id rather watch Son of Kong again

Remake was shit too

Well for one thing, we're not talking Marvel or DC. Then, for another thing, King Kong is not a huge sprawling franchise with multiple media. The embargo implies the producers weren't confident in their ability to engage audiences. That's what user is talking about.

Who cares?

This film is just zillaKINO filler

i would unironically do right over left
brie's face is disgusting tier 1/10
also
>beings a tits guy

Butt=hurt

Stay mad reddit

Briefu's going to embarrass Gal pretty badly.

>"vapidly hollow"

Opinion writers aren't journalists, and they aren't film critics either.

>Anonymous 3 hours ago No.79996210
>
>...Anonymous
>03/02/17(Thu)17:25:00 No.79996031
>trailer looked pish anyways.
>
>Marvel and DC as a property is so unbelievably dated it just seems sad trying to make it into some sort of edgy action flick that you can market to the young adult demo. say what you will about Raimi's version, at least he had the right idea to take an almost whimsical approach to something so far-fetched.

what does this have to do with Marvel or DC?

Somebody should just make a shot for shot remake of the original. The only major problem with it is the bad stop motion. It has better fight choreography than most modern movies.

people watch movies for him?

name one problem with that phrase

>Tom Hiddleston
>Talent
What did he mean by this

I thought the trailers looked bad and nothing has convinced me to see this movie. Also I realised I don't really like giant monsters without giant robots.

Right? I was in a thread last night where everyone was excited for the Vietnam feel of the trailer.

>tfw zestless

Its made by a Chinese company, it will get bombarded with bad reviews. Jews at Hollywood are waging an all out war against gook jews.

>Most reviews are saying it's just fine
I wouldn't be too worried. At the very least, Metal Gear's quality is either utter kino or utter shit. Shame, because I need complete assurance Kojimbo's masterpiece is fine, but it is how it is.

>hiddlestone

this is the director of skull island.
that is all people need to know that the flick is a $250 million Hollywood money laundry project.

a very good question

when will (((They))) ever learn?

>those shoes

is he a manlet?

...

Get an dictonary

further proof that rotten tomatoes will consider any retard a critic

Well shit, now I just find him endearing.

>he copypasted too hard

you find autism endearing?

>The Guardian

Not surprised at all, though I will wait for the Cinemassacre review before I make my final decision. James usually has a level head when it comes to these kinds of movies.

Fug. This was one of the few flicks I was actually looking forward to.

>pique
FTFY

TELL THAT TO MICHAEL SHANNON'S BROKEN WINDPIPE

I genuinely enjoyed Peter Jackson's King Kong, didn't meet a whole lot who have thought otherwise.

Don't know why they followed up with another so quickly.

>Don't know why they followed up with another so quickly.

It's because they want to make one of those combined cinematic universes with Kong and Godzilla. This movie is just a rushed excuse to establish an updated King Kong character who can be inserted into various Godzilla movies

an hour and a half could have been cut from that movie

plus, i dont know why he doesnt go back to horror movies since hes shit at drama and relies solely on gags.

is this the same guy who did that frozen movie?

horror movies are considered entry level stuff for directors, aren't they? ridley scott is the only major director i can think of off the top of my head who went back to making horror late in his career, and he only did that because the studio forced him to stop trying to be creative with the Alien franchise after he fumbled Prometheus, otherwise he would have probably taken it in a less horrorble(heh) direction

I was talking with some guy about Kong and it seems like Jackson's version is still very fresh in people's mind. They still play it on tv and doesn't really look that old. Most people have no clue this new Kong doesn't die and is part of a cinematic universe (ie they think is the same thing), this combined with shit reviews PLUS Logan + Beauty and the Beast hype might make it bomb

that was over a decade ago user

the little guy from the poster makes the director look like a kaiju

Surprise surprise another fun Legendary film gets trashed by ((((critics))))
I wonder who could possibly be behind this

he complains about the lack of monsters in Godzilla and then bitches about the lack of humans in Kong. Why would anyone give a wet shit about cuckman's opnion?

Gimme an instance when the phrase is appropriate.

He's only shitting on it because he wants to fit in.

The mouse is is cleaning house

based Disney

right? only they know quality. Can't wait for that Han Solo film. I'm stoked!

Can "zestless mashup" be the new "glib facsimile" please? I need a cool new meme.

Aye, but at what cost?

>"This movie is silly!"
>"haha! Ant-Man is good ol' fun!"

Men will see this for Kong.
Women will see it for Tom