What is the first thing you do in the morning?

What is the first thing you do in the morning?

wake up

wake up and cry because i didn't die in sleep

unironically fap

Cry.

This and then look at the ceiling while in bed and ask myself when did I start to lose control over my own life.

Poo in loo

This, I'm usually woken up by beer diarrhea. Most of the time, I'm able to grab my laptop from the living room before shuffling to the toilet with my ass clenched as tight as possible.

Cigarette.

Do all Americans suffer from chronic diarrhea?

feed the belgian slaves

Wonder when did life lose its luster.

When did it become so empty.

Try drinking excessive amounts of beer for a few years and you'll have it too.

Go on my phone or brush my teeth.

shoo away the blacks sleeping in my garden

Begin feeling my hangover, cigarette craving, and cannabis hyperemesis (which I cure instantly with extra strength capsaicin cream, so then I also feel spicy.)

go on my computer
i do this all day then i go to sleep
rinse and repeat
someday i need to make a change

this then this

drink my morning coffee and take my daily doze of 10mg diazepam

piss

Yeah, I remember not having many problems until about 2 years into drinking every night. Now, 2L of beer without food or while just eating vegetables and rice causes it. Pizza is the best food to eat before drinking.

Figure out where I am

godspeed

open cellphone
check my crypto investments

2-3 cups of coffee drank extremely slowly while doing stupid shit like watching youtube and/or checking messages

If I have somewhere to be in the morning then drink the same amount of coffee faster while feeling miserable and rushed.

Find my spectacles

i really wish i had a gf

Take Tallink to Tallinn and visit Helsinki bar or Saatama baar. Plenty of girls looking for Finnish guys.
>I used to work as doorman/security at both.

Take a piss