Realistically what is stopping soccer teams from hiring obese 7 foot tall people to stand in front of the net...

Realistically what is stopping soccer teams from hiring obese 7 foot tall people to stand in front of the net essentially making it impossible to score after the first goal has been scored? Is it unethical? Would this lead to a rule change or nets being changed?

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I don't think there are that many obese people outside of USA, user.

Obviously they could hire people from the US

And pay them with coupons from McDonalds?

refs in soccer have unlimited and completely subjective power. they could just red card the whole bunch

You're only strengthening the argument

How would the obese people score the first goal tho?

Pacey niggers.

there are no 7 foot tall obese people in the world

You have other people on the team

There could be easily.

the answer to all life's quandaries

My money is still on 10 silverback gorillas.

also getting hit with a ball hurts

You would probably get a few hand ball penalties per game and also you could target their genitals with hard kicks.

The obese people would get hungry and have to leave

Remember that time when Messi took a sugar pill during the game? All you need is swap an obese on the halfway mark of a half and bring some burgers with him.

Handball and a resultant penalty doesn't have to be a movement towards the ball, it just has to be the refs decision that the arm is being held in that position in order to obstruct the ball. So they would have their arms+elbows behind their backs. Very obese people. Despite this their ankles and heads would be insufficiently broad to cover the goal, so they would have to actively react in order to block, despite being super-sumo build. Their ability to do so would be impaired by dudes booting 100kph shots at their heads/nuts for 90 minutes. On any occasion where one of them needed a concussion timeout an opposition player could stand in their place - if the referee allowed them to shove the skinny boy away, they would also allow the attacking team to collectively tip one of the meat sacks over.

*multiple flags throwin in the field*
ILLEGAL BREATHING, DEFENSE NUMBER 67
50 YD PENALTY, AUTOMATIC FIRST DOWN, AUTOMATIC TOUCHDOWN

You can only make 3 substiutions per game. To have 7 obese people you would need to start 4 of them, and you can't score a goal with 4 obese people in your starting lineup. This isn't the NFL.

Shaquille oneal

Further to my point, when the ball goes out of play behind the goal, a goal kick is awarded, for which all players (of either side) apart from the goalkeeper must leave the penalty box. Opponents could kick the ball out and then oblige the fatties to repeatedly shuttle run back to the goalline. By endlessly blasting the ball into the stands they could win the match by murder in the 4th degree as the goal blockers eventually fell to heart attacks.

At best they could tie every game 0-0 and would lose any tournament game in penalties

youtube.com/watch?v=_CFgLKycclA

Something like this could work with 3 pace merchants immediately subbed off afterwards.

what? lmao are you mad?

Just pointing out the true fact that handegg is so much worse than football when it comes to refs ruining the game

notice how this is the only example of said scheme working. 9 times out of 10 you'de get a wrong bounce and get destroyed on the counter.

when we have our first nfl ref game fixing scandal, i'll be the first to compare them
until then, LMAO

Soccer goal is 8 feet there's still a 1 foot gap where they could shoot.

Because it doesn't work

youtube.com/watch?v=Y08XxaQXcU4

Only opposing players have to be outside of the penalty box.

If that were a viable strategy then 7ft obese people, being as rare as they are, would command astronomical salaries.

hoof it to drogba obviously

Those are manlets though

They can't all use their hands?

Why can’t i just sew some feet on the end of all my players arms so they can carry the ball to the goal?

maybe you guys need some more penalties to stop the incessant diving

if basketball and the nfl finally die, would we get giganigga soccer players?

why didn’t the eagles just fly the ring to mount doom?

because the goal is only 8 feet high and they need to at least be able to stand on their tippie-toes

...

>Other team has 95% possession
>Relentlessly line up kicks and blast the wall
>Only designated goalies can use hands
>Eventually the other fatties suffer injuries to the chest or head or use their hands
>Other team eventually gets one by

This strategy of the OP would only work at the lowest levels of club play and even then not often enough to make it viable.

A handball has to be deliberate you fucking retards
Jesus shit this is the 15th most popular sport in my country and I know more about it than you faggots were it’s number 1

>A handball has to be deliberate you fucking retards
not necessarily, involuntary movements can be punished

What's stopping NFL teams from just hiring Usain Bolt as running back and let him rush past the defence and score touchdown after touchdown?

>obese 7 foot tall people

we don't have as many niggermicans

drop burger on penalty spot
suddenly open goal
score is 1-1
obese players sent off for fighting with each other

this

poles get fat as fuck here.

everybody does, it's the jews spreading mcdonalds chemitrails in the air making amerifats even fatter

PERSONAL FOUL NUMBER 53. HE WAS GIVIN HIM THE BUSINESS

he didnt say 7 people you dumb fatty

because you need to score first

with that many fat people you wouldn't be able to do it

and the Bus strategy already exists

...

>holding your hands up to obstruct the ball isn't deliberate
Burger logic.

The best defence is the attack.