Turn off the tv user I'm trying to sleep

>Turn off the tv user I'm trying to sleep

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ok sis

>probably used the toilet earlier

>now sitting with her bacteria covered ass cheeks on my couch

yea this is why i wont get a gf :/

>no dick

*INHALES DEEPLY*

This

Im so alone in this world. More alone then I realized.

PUFFY

>brown vag from wiping the wrong way all her life
Imagine the smell

Would you be able to smell it from that distance? Asking for a friend.

get a job you fucking slut im tired of you crashing on my couch

Correct. No girl wants an autistic bf.

>wiping the wrong way

What the fuck do you mean

Would suck on those soles for hours tbqh

this

get this faggot shit off my board

than*
It's not difficult to learn, fucknut!

*queefs*

depends on how often she bathed and how big a slut she is

>he doesn't know

Some people wipe their butt through their legs towards the front. It happens a lot to people that sit down to wipe.

Honestly depends on the girl

After sex/arousal I used to be able to smell my ex's vag when she was wearing just panties from thast distance

>sit down to wipe
I stand on my tippy toes and bend over

How else would you do it

I'm forever alone and it has really made me cruel as you can imagine. I wish I had the drive to kill myself.

>people that sit down to wipe.

Do these people exist?

Who is this?

>people that stand up and smear shit all over their ass cheeks

Do these people exist?

are you obese?

What did she mean by this?

Lick it.

Yeah, THAT'S why you'll be forever alone

Virgin, the thread

>2017
>not using wet wipes

>the state of Sup Forums - Television & Film

You're going to be murdered, SWIM hopes.

>then
your to intelagent four women

>not wanting shit germs on your furniture is autism

That fat pussy looks so good

Fuck why am i a virgin!!!!

thinking these small amount of bacteria on the sofa would harm you is autism, yes

I stand up with one foot on the counter so I can see my ass in the mirror to ensure i'm wiping all the shit.

>looking at the vagina and not the soles

Are you gay or something?

Sup Forums is dead.

...

Kill yourself foot cuck

but what other mindless task am I going to do for the next hour then, sis?

this very moment there are more germs on your face than on your ass.

holy fuck, I no joke do this sometimes

Except most the time I'll hold onto the towel rack

How do people find vaginas attractive? Most of the time they look hideous like that one

This how could they reach the inside of the anus while standing up?

If you had to think about actually being with another human you'd make sure your ass is clean too

...

>premium feet and pussy

I think you're perfect just the way you are.

>Amerifats don't use bidets to clean their bumholes
lmao

I want to smell that couch now, fuck.

*braap*

>ywn feel her feet running up against your shoulders and back as you go to town on eating that pussy

what the fuck do you use toilet paper for?

Or you could use wet wipes like a normal person

Shooting water into your anus is about as gay as it gets lad.

...

Or you could pull your head out of your ass and realize most bathrooms don't have wet wipes.

Why is cuckoldry always on your mind, are you a cuck yourself?
No one else here mentioned cuckoldry other than you.

Shit
Two or three wipes with paper
Once you removed the big boys you go to the bidet to clean it better
Wipe with paper around the hole in case you didn't do it right so you don't shit the towel
Towel ont he cheeks

Can't deny it feels good mang

It's water, not an 8-inch cock you insecure clown. Do you also refrain from masturbating because you would be giving a guy a handjob?

Wet wipes also fuck up most plumbing

Nocturnal Animals did a survey to find out how to most accurately portray wiping in film. The results clearly show that the most normal way to wipe for a healthy, non-obese adult is sitting, leaning slightly forward, wiping from the front and backwards. Obese people are more likely to wipe back to front, because their asses are literally to big for them to get their arms behind themselves to wipe front to back.

Case closed, if you dont wipe sitting front to back, you are a obeast lardplanet or autistic.

i.4cdn.org/wsg/1489103532359.webm

So you stand at the counter in public bathrooms staring at your shitty asshole? I'm sure you're very popular with the ladies

This. It's only a couple bucks for a pack of flushable wet wipes. An affordable luxury that everyone should treat themselves to

>not putting the bidet on maximum pressure

what if it shoots up through the space between your dick and the toilet seat in front of your ass? water would go on the floor

I use a phone to make sure I don't have a shitty ass, yes. It's not my fault bathrooms on this continent don't have anything to clean your ass with but 2 cent TP.

Where do the shit partials go in the bidet if it doesnt flush??

She's cute, but not Gods gift to mankind.

7/10 - would fuck, might date, would not bring home to meet parents.

ya, but you gotta take that risk

that's why do you do paper before going to the bidet, you remove the solid with paper

>not *qeeff*

I fucking hate this board
And you all

You take a picture of your butthole?