/CHI/

i'm having a hard time living

please reply

:/

It was always interesting for me to think about half breeds.

You have Dna of both nations. And you have a choice to either embace your mother's of father's side.
What diaspora would you stick with and create a family?
Will you restore your family phenotype by going for specific nation of your parent or just say fuck it and find another person from nation that non of your parents from.

Quite interesting.

it's different for us we have mexican parents but we are in the US and they both hate us

Why don't you just stick with american side of yours.
Does your american parent identify himself with some other nationality other than american? Irish, german or polish for example?
Try to find yourself somebody who identify like that?

they aren't american thats what makes us CHI's

CHI

everyday i wake up I have to face the reality that is my life

Getting out of bed really is hard somedays, there is nothing to get up for. Occasionally it doesn't feel that bad and there are things that I still find entertaining though. It's just too easy to become miserable and to stay miserable at this point.

even when i'm not feeling bad it just something i can't stop thinking about

I don't think about it constantly but it is very easy to get into a vicious cycle where you start going through all the things that have gone wrong and all the things that are going wrong and that usually ruins a few days, though rarely the misery can last for some weeks.

well like I said it's only really in the mornings as soon as I wake up so it pretty much ruins my day(not that it was going to be good)

Also occasionally during those cycles of misery I get a small headeche, I get a small sensation of pressure inside my frontal lobe which doesn't really help me to feel okay sooner.

how was your day?

Mainly made up hurdles and excuses for myself. Anyways I have managed to to get a significantly clearer picture on how i'm going to go about that trip. Which isn't that much progess if you consider it took all day and it has been months in the making already. In short it was a little disappointing but not a total loss.

i'm telling you just pick a destination and go you can just book an airbnb or something

hey /chi/, it's hapa again. I'm stressed because I have like 4 papers and 2 exams next week, and it's a lot. But I'm going to the MET art nurse I'm in New York Saturday, so that's cool.

whats up how you been

I have pretty much made up my mind where to go now, now i'm just looking into making it happen and avoiding fucking up. It most likely won't change anything but if it's atleast all in all a positive experience it will be well worth it, there hasn't been that many positive things in a long while.

how will you fuck up though?

Depending on when my flight arrives, how to get to the hotel/hostel, figuring out how to get around which ever city/country I am in. Generally I am just trying to know and learn atleast a little before I go, don't want to be completely clueless when I go. This is a bit new to me so i'm probably just nervous over nothing.

i'm tired of constantly feeling like shit no matter what i do, it actually makes me angry which makes me feel worse and there's nothing i can do to get rid of the frustration

you're over thinking it just book a hotel and the flight and you're good to go

iktf, and for some reason it's only been getting worse as of late i think it's because i'm getting older and I don't have shit going on in my life

i'm really considering buying some equipment and then running off into the woods and never ever interact with society ever again. i'll most likely die but at this rate i'll go insane and kill myself regardless.

I think about the same thing like I just want to get my shit and go but i only have like 100 dollars to my name

tfw CHI gf

stop bragging