I want to move to switzerland

Zug, because I want to work in the blockchain industry.
I'm american. What are my chances?

Even if this wasn't a shitpost, you'd have no chance of surviving more than one month because of swiss German.

What's wrong with it?

with OP's post?
>blockchain industry

With Swiss German?
Just go to Youtube... You'll figure it out

Learn German first .

It sounds like a different language

I can understand High German pretty well.
However I literally cannot understand a single word when someone speaks Swiss "German".

Not op btw

Completing some lessions on Duolingo doesn't mean you're able to understand High German after a week of learning.

>Swiss German
If it only was that easy

>anyone who claims to speak German can't actually speak German.

anyway, Swiss German being an absolute meme aside, Switzerland is pretty difficult to immigrate to, as far as I know.

Dann zeig mir, wie gut du Deutsch sprechen kannst, aber dalli, Tyrone.

Idk dude I think after taking 7 years of German in school I might have a little knowledge

Ich sagte nie dass Ich Deutsch spreche, aber es ist etwas besser als "ein woch auf Duolingo."

Dat kleene Jüngelche könnt ma n bissl Schriftkantenglättung vertragen

Go to sleep, Hans, you're drunk.

This is exacly what I was trying to say, you don't have a chance if you haven't learnt speaking dialect(s). And I wasn't even really trying...
Using dialects is a legitimate tactic politicians/officials were using when they thought they were being observed by murricans in the past.
You can be glad that speaking dialect is considered being uneducated by most of Germans and that the number of non-high-german speakers is declining since decades compared to all German speakers, fortunately.

Not him but wtf were you trying to say.
"Little guy? could stand to go through a bit of ???"

I may be wrong but it seems a bit redundant to learn local dialects. As far as I know everyone knows high German along with their local dialect so it is not like there is a barrier to communication. It seems pointless to learn multiple variations of one basic language. Also plenty of places' local dialects are dead/dying and that's only going to continue.

My girlfriend promised me to take me to her family in Switzerland when we are older, so see you there.

Why do Brits speak 100 different versions of British? Why are Irish and Scottish people barely comprehensible? Why do rednecks and niggers speak like that? Why do Aussies and Kiwis speak like retards? Do they not know standard Oxford English in addition to their local dialect?

To answer your question:
>Der kleine Junge könnte mal ein bisschen Schriftkantenglättung vertragen
>The little boy could use a little bit of font edge smoothing

Gouda or Emmentaler?

so basically my dream is a meme. :(

I unironically come from Gouda, so my answer would be obvious, but I'm always open for new insights.

Fuck off nignog, we are full

>italy