"H... hey user. I uhhh seem to have let myself go a bit. Do you think you could help me lose a teeny bit of weight?...

"H... hey user. I uhhh seem to have let myself go a bit. Do you think you could help me lose a teeny bit of weight? ...Please? Oh fuck..."

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Sure, what exercises were you planning on doing? ?-?

"Well... i don't know, i never tried losing weight before. This is all kinda new for me..."

Why not try jogging for a bit?

"Oh damn..." *i sigh*
"Ok ok yeah... how hard can it be?"

Alright. But don’t be too tough on yourself.

"Awww you are too sweet, user"
*gives you a huge hug*
"How far should i run then?"

Stop consuming jewish products

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Uh, as far as you’re willing to go without pressing too much on yourself

"Ah, so bacon is still ok then?"

you are perfect as you are. Nice wide hips, a cute chubby tummy and nice plump tits, what is there better to ask for really?

*jogs over to the treadmill*
Phew... ok... how was... that?
* i ask as i wipe the sweat from my face*

Ha! The jew controls the meat industry, bacon contains elements necessary for muscle gain therefore a healthy amount is encouraged. High protein, low carbs, big gains, gains and more gains. Crush the international jew.

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Yea, you did fine. Drink some water and relax for a bit

"Well, id say it would be nice to be able to bend over and tie my shoes without getting out of breath..."

I could help you with that until you manage to get to confortable weight love

"Ok good! Am i thin now?"

run around the block

"Yeah, but that still involves losing some weight though..."

"Gains? Are you crazy, i don't want to gain!"

"Oh God... the whole block?"
* i whine*
"How about just half for now?"

Simple solution: Eat less, but much more often. Instead of eating 2 sandwiches for dinner, trench them in half and eat a part every hour!

Then how do you intend to gain the necessary mass to sculpt into a physique of Herakles?

"But... i already sna k pretty constantly around the clock..."

"Hercules? I just want to not look like a beanbag chair "


Shut up, fat

"i miss candy and tacos... and burritos and cheesecake..."

>Fat white women
Fuckin rollin

fuck forgot pic

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"I... im not fat!!! Im just chubby..."

Sad. Very sad indeed. It is not just for one to not aspire for something greater. Instead of losing your mass, convert it into a weapon, turn an ugly block of marble into a beautiful sculpture worthy of Michelangelo himself.

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you can still have them but once a week only. It will be your cheat day, during that day, you can fill your mouth with yummy stuff all you want

"...is today not aloud to be a cheat day?"

Sure, lets go for a jog.

I'm putting on the pounds myself.

"Heh heh... yeah just a tad. How far do i have to go?"

yes it can! we'll go buy some stuff and make a nice meal, so tomorrow you can begin happy, or almost :D

"... can tomorrow be a cheat day too then?"

yes, but no cheat day for two weeks then o_o''

"Ah... man this is going to be pretty hard isn't it? Have you ever done this before?"


Yes, I'd have to work 8 hours a day so I would separate my dinner meal in 8 parts, eat one every hour. If I was feeling weird, I'd eat two parts and wait two hours

"Well damn, how much were you able to lose?"

about 5 pounds in like a week and a half, sorry forgot to precise

"Wow, that's impressive! How much should i lose?"

maybe 20 pounds and you should already feel much healthier

Hop on a treadmill bitch

"T...twenty? Oh fuck, i didnt think it was that bad..."
*i suck my stomach in*
"How about now, user?"

"Oh God, not that thing again... last time I got on that my lungs were on fire for like 40 minutes..."

I can still see your jiggly little butt. By the way, we should also go for a wlak every nights, 1 hour of walking s day will help accelerate your weight loss a lot!

Then stop eating cheeseburgers you retarded amerifuck I live in your country and everyone is fat

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*i cover my ass with my hands*
"My butt isn't that jiggly!"
*i look down at my body and sigh*
"Ok ok... you are the boss i guess..."

"I... im sorry! Im trying ok! I never had to lose weight before..."

I'll say it again, you are perfect as you are but if you feel the need to lose weight , that's because there's a reason to it. No wrong doing here :)

"I mean, i do feel the need to lose weight... its just that motivation is a really fickle bitch.."

The easiest way to lose weight is to kill yourself in an area with lots of flies. After a couple days the maggots will begin to devour your flesh. If you're lucky, wild animals will find your carcass and tear out some large chunks, which will rapidly help you lose weight.

Hope this helps!

you need strong motivation

strong chubby thighs like yours must be filled with motivation!!!

"No... just cheesecake and tacos mostly..."

"Ugh... i know i know... maybe if i just got up off my ass more..."

Sit your fat ass down, just ordered you an XL pizza

"Uhhhh thats not gonna be very helpful, user..."

We've been over this dear, you're either losing weight or gaining it. And last I checked your gym membership expired, so...

Download my fitness pal app.
Browse /fit/.
Fuck off.

"Oh God... ill start to try harder, i promise!"

seriously user, who are you?

You'd better, otherwise you'll be my pet pig

"Come on... you know me, babe"

Yes, I've seen you many times on Sup Forums but who is the one writing it?

"That would be me"

what kinda fuckin degenerate shit is this

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post a photo of with a timestamp!

That's up to you to decide. We're in a gym so there are probably mirrors everywhere. Do YOU feel like you're thin now?

*looks away from the mirrors *

"N...no i guess not. I was hoping you would think so though..."

* i sigh*


I like you as you are.

Making black babies is exercise

*i smile*
"You are too sweet user, but some of this weight needs to go!"

what is the purpose of these weird roleplay threads? genuine question. i see this thread all the time. what are you hoping to hear in response? what do you get out of this? is it a fetish thing?

nig me

yeah that's right keep not answering

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alright. you are from now on going on a diet of just my cum and water

Just cut out some carbs.
Lose the potatoes, corn.
Limit your bread to just sandwiches.
No pastry or donuts.

you're not really desperate enough to believe you're talking to an actual woman, right?

I'm always in need of chubby titties to wank at

Intermittent fasting is effective and sustainable once you are used to it. Start by only eating within a twelve hour window in your day, gradually reducing this to eight hours, nothing but water, black coffee, or unsweetened tea outside of the window. If you compensate by eating a metric ass-ton of food within the window it won't work, of course, but if you eat normally within your window it will benefit both body composition and energy levels. If youdo resistance training during your fast portion of the cycle you won't be able to do nearly as much as you are used to but the metabolic benefits are amazing. Hands down the lowest maintenance and least complex program ever.

This thread is dumb but it got me hard so who am I to judge

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How the fuck do people even have trouble losing weight? It's fucking simple to do and you don't have to starve yourself or exercise like an Olympian.

This guide is dedicated to all the fatties out there:

Eat meat and veggies. Eat as much as you fucking want. Yes, I'm being absolutely serious. You're probably saying "I've tried that. It doesn't work." It didn't work because you didn't follow the directions, lardass. I'll break it down so even your stupidly gigantic ass can understand:

>Eat meat means exactly what it says.
Eat meat, not some deep fried shit encrusted microwavable abomination that's half chemicals. Grab a fresh steak, chicken, pork, fish, whatever, and season it with salt and spices. Don't batter it. The batter and gallons of oil is what's packing on the blubber. Just use enough oil to cook it, but never enough to immerse it.

>Eat veggies. Read it again. Vegetables.
If you don't know what a vegetable is, look it up. Potatoes and beans don't count. Don't eat those, fatty. Cook your veggies however you want, but the same rules apply as with the meat. Don't drench it in fats and oils. Just enough to add some flavour. You can even cook the meats and veggies together.

That's it. Eat all you want.

Now for things NOT to eat:

>Don't eat starches.
This includes potatoes, beans, other legumes. Look that word up if you don't know what it means. Don't eat those! Keep your hamfists away from them.

>Don't eat grains.
These are starches as well, but they deserve a separate category. Don't eat bread, rice, oatmeal, cereal, cake, pie, etc. You can actually eat a little bit of whole grains, but for simplicity, just stay away from all of them.

>Don't eat sugary shit
This is where you're probably getting most of your excess calories from, especially if you live in America. Almost everything that's prepackaged is full of sugar, so let's keep it simple. If it's sweet, don't eat it.
>End of part 1

>part 2 of how to stop being a disgusting landwhale

>Don't eat "sugar free" shit.
The sugar substitutes are all bad for you. ALL OF THEM! No, I don't care what Dr. Ramalamadingdong said. They all cause cancer eventually. So I'll say it again:

>If it's sweet, don't eat it
This also applies to drinks. Don't drink sweet shit. That includes juices. Just leave it alone fatty. It's not your friend.

There. That's it. Enjoy watching the weight slowly drop on its own.

Once you've dropped to a reasonable weight, you can start eating some of those things on the nono list, but only small amounts. SMALL amounts only, unless you want to go back to not being able to properly wipe your own arse.

>What about exercise?
As long as you followed the rules, you don't have to do anything special. Just normal walking around getting from place to place is enough. Of course, if you want to exercise more, then you absolutely should. Just know that it isn't mandatory as long as you're not eating like jabba the fucking hut.

>The end

PS - fuck you too, fuck your mother, neck yourself, get raped by a gang of niggers, etc. back at you, faglord.

She's kinda hot

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>Part 3 because I'm fucking retarded and forgot

>What about dairy?
Dairy is fine. Milk, butter, cheese, etc. They're all fine. Just don't fucking gorge yourself on them. Eat mainly meats and veggies, but some dairy is fine.

>What about eggs?
These are fine too. Just don't break any of the previous rules when you eat them though.

>I have questions because you didn't talk about X
First ask yourself if it's covered by the above. If it is, just follow the damn rules laid out. If it's not, ask away.

>Why should I believe a word you say?
You shouldn't. Go read up on everything I wrote. It's all true, but don't take my word for it. This applies to everything really these days. Always verify.

I would probably fuck a 2d fat chick. The 3d ones are gross as fuck. They look like garbage bags full of cottage cheese.