fucking god damnit i think i might have to sell my house and move
>work called and asked me to come in late for an emergency >ran over a cat a street over >someone seen me do it and pointed me to the owners home >of course no one would be home >wrap in blanket i kept in the back >left note >stopped by liquor store on way to work and quickly bought a 1.75 liter of that coffee cream stuff for a later apology suddenly >work done >lights are on their house on way home >stop, knock, meet, explain >they give me an odd look and say that gift might not be age appropriate >i killed their little girls cat >but the parents take the bottle anyways and tell me they already had the talk >apologized to the girl and had the most fucking awkward walk away ever >how can i make this better green text intermission text >go to walmart >buy leftover candy >its halloween even this wont be weird right? >get on street and suddenly realize i am a 35 year old man buying candy for a girl i dont know at 10 in the evening long after trick or treating is done >throw all the candy bags in a scared fit on their lawn from the truck >they open the curtain >eye contact >drive away
go in the morning while shes at school, explain to parent you were caughtup in the guilt, overlooked the time, your return to explain makes the whole drive away less tonight akward, then explain the candy is to make up for the ruined halloween, then give them a $100 bill, tell them this is to cover a adoption fee from a local shelter for a new cat, maybe some food. it wil be alot less then moving away, worth not having to hide from the neighbors. plus even though your a cat murderer, you are also am catatarian, by setting in motino the adoption of a shelter cat, so your karma is equalized. partially, but the experience is still there, so someone will probably cause a similar pain to you or someone close to you.
>Hey remember last night how I made this situation worse with good intentions? well heres a 100 dollars
Alexander Flores
Why wouldn't you just tell them to fuck off? Shoot the dogs and cats that you see in your neighborhood. They produce nothing.
Jaxon Kelly
cant tell if nigger who thinks this is socially acceptable or a chink who is looking for a meal
John Russell
Reminds me of when I hit someone’s dog and I scooped up the pieces. I was on benzos and I put one of those cone birthday hats on the dead dogs head and set the dog on their porch
So picture a mashed up dog with a party hat on, just sitting in front of their door.
To make it worse I set a card next to the body that said “sorry about the dog” and I put $3.50 in loose change with it.
If the fuckwads allow their cat loose at night, then they deserve what they got. You owe them nothing. In fact, they owe you an apology for the stress they caused you.
>fuckwads allow their cat loose at night ...most of them do just that, then blame others for the results of the mischief caused by the fckn cat.
Caleb Price
hahaha shit dude. a buddy of mine and I ripped up the floors of his parents' finished guest house that *we* built and insulated, etc because we thought we lost a half a script of 120 banana Runt kpins when in reality we had let thrown them under our tongues while double fisting deuce deuces of Mickey's for days on end. those were truly the days
Cats shouldnt even be allowed outside they fuck everything up.
Adrian Wood
amateur taxidermist here, a couple days ago i picked up a roadkill cat in my neighboorhood (i pick up a lot of roadkill)
im a huge cat lover so it always makes me sad. responsible cat owners should always keep their cat indoors at all times.
it was so fucked up i could only save the paws, the skull had been run over many times and its insides were basically turned inside out. ive been keeping an eye out for any "lost cat" signs...
I have two good friends with two fckn cats. The cats shit and piss everywhere in the house, and my friends clean up after them daily. I just don't fckn understand.
Dylan Peterson
they arent litter trained? its in a cats nature to want to bury or hide their piss and shit from predators. its easy as fuck to litter train a cat
Elijah Clark
>after trick or treating is done.
The bot is broken Trick or treating doesn't start in the U.S. for about 16 hours.
Sage isn't just a type of incense for hippies.
Landon Allen
bitch i had trick or treaters last week because of some county law shit
>litter trained They are "supposed" to be, but they still shit and piss all over the house.
Kayden Foster
i used to work as a cat caretaker for adoptable cats. about 20 cats at a time. even little kittens teach themselves to piss and shit in the litter box because its just in their nature.
im guessing your friends dont change the litter enough or filter it enough. cats can smell the high amounts of ammonia or something in the piss and know that its unsafe to keep using a litter box with really old piss in it.
or if its not cleaned enough it can be bad for their respiratory system and they wont use it.
Wyatt Martin
>your friends dont change the litter enough Maybe. They have a huge two-story house (for just the two of them) with a litter box on each story, and they argue over who cleans them.
Anthony Bailey
don't forget to change the sheets in cabin 10 tomorrow
That is more awkward than when a man was chasing my dog home with a single peacock feather from a peacock that she allegedly ate of course there where 2 dogs in the pen and they where both mine heheh still laugh to this day!!
Jose Price
>they argue over who cleans them. it sounds like they don't scoop the poop often enough. cats are actually really clean and won't use the litter box if its too full. would you use a toilet in your house that was backed up with shit?
Jaxson Richardson
just for curiosity's sake, what city did this event occur in?
