Thoughts?

Thoughts?

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I liked it

I legitimately read his name as louis cuck

ffukc this website

The bit about the interracial breeding grounds was pretty enlightening

I miss Louis Cuck posting, have a (you)

Louis CucK.

>YOU! THE MELANIN ENRICHED FRIEND! COME ON STAGE AND FUCK MY DAUGHTER
>Yes! yes! Just like abuelita tought me! C'mon you bull!

What did he mean by this?

i liked the beheading bit

>"I'm really scared of my daughters growing up, you know?"
>"The whole sex thing is freaking me out and I-I just wanted to be sure that they are safe"
>"So I went around the neighborhood and luckily found 2 healthy young black men to be the boyfriends of my daughters"

Some real eye opening shit

>the audience is growing impatient
>a young white woman and a small contingent of white men are seated in the middle of the auditorium, surrounded on all sides by black bucks
>they fearfully look on as the crowd becomes increasingly erratic
>"EYYO WHERE THE WHITE BOY AT DOO?"
>a small group of basketball americans are seen beating bongo drums and blowing vuvuzelas in the back
>"IMMA TEAR THIS MOFUCKA DOWN IN ONE MINUTE IF-"
>suddenly the curtains part
>the crowd immediately goes silent
>louis ck steps out wearing nothing but a bathrobe
>they look on in anticipation, mouths agape
>louis ck steps up to the microphone but does not utter a single word
>the crowd starts shifting uncomfortably in their seats
>the white men futilely look behind them to the exit
>shaquille o'neal steps in their line of site and blocks the doorway
>louis silently pans over the crowd and begins licking his lips
>the silence becomes unbearable
>an erection emerges from louis' bathrobe
>a black baby is heard crying in the distance
>the audience starts twitching, unable to cope
>louis ck leans in to the microphone, lips touching the surface
>barely parts his lips to compose a whisper
>"big black cocks"
>the crowd erupts into hoots and hollers and begins stomping their feet in unison
>the white woman is already hogtied and having her earlobes stretched
>the screams of chimpanzees are drowned out by loud rap music
>BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY ROCKIN ERRWHERE
>circuis performers ride their stolen bikes on stage
>the entire concession stand has been looted
>the white men are crucified as the crowd cheeers
>the ghost of martin luther king jr is seen up in the rafters
>a single phantasmal tear rolls down his cheek

HAHA
LOUIS CK
MORE LIKE KEK KING AM I RIGHT REDDIT
I MEAN GUYS
HAHA

>The ending of Magic Mike is that I'm gay

In all seriousness, it was....not great. It got one big laugh out of me - honestly couldn't tell you what bit it was, I legitimately have forgotten - and I kind of giggled through most of it. The ending was pretty awful though, so underwhelming. And what was with the way it cut to credits before the encore? What the fuck?

Chappelle's first special was about 50 times better than this one.

I also cannot believe that Louis CK would bother spending like $100,000 on clearing the rights to 1 minute of Led Zeppelin at the end. Like who gives a fuck Louis stop showing off

*Louis C.K. walks on stage, sits on a stool. His face is somber*
>Folks...I wanna be serious for a moment. I've got something I need to say.
*Crowd murmurs, some worried faces in the audience*
>My wife...my wife just gave birth to a healthy black baby boy!
*Crowd erupts in cheers and applause, cries of "Congratulations"*
>9 months ago my wife was bred by a strong black bull and today I held the product of his virile seed in my arms. I couldn't have been more proud.
>But you know, when I was in the nursery, I looked around at the other babies too. And when I looked at the white babies-
*Crowd begins to hiss and boo*
>I know how you feel, everyone. But when I looked at the white babies, and more specifically the, uh, diaper area. I noticed that they all head
*Crowd shouts in unison "LITTLE WHITE DICKS!"
>I couldn't believe how tiny those things were! I felt SORRY for the women who have to put up with THAT someday!
*Laughter*
>But when I looked down at the baby in my arms, I could see from one glance that he had a-
*Crowd shouts in unison "BIG BLACK COCK!"
>I was like "Damn, this thing is bigger than mine, and he's just a baby!" So much for "white supremacy", huh?
*More laughter*
>I know one day he's gonna please a loooooot of white women unhappy with their husbands' tiny dicks, just like mine!
*Cheers mix into the laughter, one white woman shouts "Me first, me first!"
>Sorry, but there's already a hundred people ahead of you on the list.
*Crowd "aw"s.*
>But you know...you MIGHT be able to get to the top of the list...if you suck the cock of every black man in the audience right now!
*Crowd explodes with excitement, chants of "Do it!" and "Suck that cock!" erupt. The woman's husband cheers her on as she gets on her knees in front of the first black man. The show ends as everyone watches the woman service black man after black man*

Only joke I chuckled at

>I've been fortunate to have such a great career that has taken me all around the world but one place I will NEVER go again is England.

>Initially, I was super excited to go since a friend told me they have over 10 stations completely owned by the BBC. You can imagine my fury when I realised it was just soap operas about pathetic white people in poorly decorated apartments.

>After letting off a bit of steam with a Shane Diesel DVD, my daughter got me worked up again by telling me her pregnancy test was negative, AGAIN!

>I got straight on the phone to the concierge desk and screamed "Listen up Prince Fuckstick, I need the address of the nearest Interracial Breeding Grounds NOW!"

"We dun 'av nuffin like dat 'ere mate but deres a swingers club a coupla blocks away innit"

>"Is it BBC exclusive or what?"

"Don't fink so matey, sorry bout dat"

>I slammed the phone down, cancelled my shows and donated all proceeds to the NAACP and hopped the first plane back to LA just in time to drop my girl off at Kylie Jenner's birthday party. Fuck England

>LITTLE WHITE DICKS!
BOOOOOOOOOO!
*Crowd begins to hiss and shout phrases like "GET OUTTA TOWN!"*
>BIG BLACK COCKS!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
*Crowd begins to cheer, stomp feet and lift lighters into the air*
>Now I know there are some people out there that haven't tasted a black man's cock!
>"Some haven't even let one plant their seed in their wives!"
*Crowd begins to boo and hiss again*
>But most straight white privileged males don't even engage in black culture!
>I for instance recently met the Wu-Tang Clan
>I heard one of their songs was called "Wu-Tang Clan ain't nuthin to fuck wit"
>More like, Wu-Tang Clan AIN'T NUTHIN TO KEK WIT!
>Like seriously! They absolutely ravaged my wife's dripping cunt hole, I slurped up the cum from her pussy after everyone of them defiled her!
*Crowd begins to cheer as all white males in the crowd are beaten*
>I mean it's only my duty isn't it!? Whites LITERALLY invented slavery and everything bad in the world!
*All the white females in the crowd are now being raped while the white males are being forced to watch and suck BBCs*
>MY DAUGHTER SHOULD LITERALLY GET RAPED BY BLACK COCK!
>NOW FOR OUR SPECIAL GUESTS, THE RZA, THE GZA, OLD DIRTY BASTARD, INSPECTAH DECK, RAEKWON THE CHEF, U-GOD, GHOSTFACE KILLAH AND THE METHOD MAN!
*Wu-Tang Clan storm on stage with their cocks hanging out, Louis is already on his knees sucking off ODB while RZA starts rapping*
>THERE'S NO PLACE TO HI-HIDE WHEN I SLIP INSI-HIDE THE WOMB... DOCTOR DOOM, PREPARE FOR THE BOOM!... OH MAN... I SLAM... YOUR MAM! NOW WATCH HER CREAM LIKE TARZAAAAN!
*Louis is now being raped by Ghostface as he sucks off Method Man and ODB*

Wow, the person who wrote this is literally mentally ill

Good thing we can screencap those so we can laugh and cry at the same time when this will become official part of American culture 50 years from now.

>Louis CK steps on stage
>his appearance is dishevelled, beard unkempt, clothes tattered, skin paler than usual
>dark bags droop beneath his sunken, dead eyes
>the crowd cheers as he slowly limps to the microphone
>he grasps it with a trembling hand
>"L-Lit..."
>the crowd is on the edge of their seats
>"Little..." CK barely audibly whispers
>a pair of size thirteen jordans lands on stage
>"Oh God I can't do this anymore"
>Louis runs off stage sobbing
>the crowd is still, silence broken only by an indistinct "dayum" in the back
>"I guess that's that"
>the crowd begins getting up from their seats and leaving the auditorium single-file
>a faint bongo drumming is heard in the distance
>the crowd looks behind them at the stage
>the drumming becomes louder and more discernible
>a lone negro sits back down in his seat
>suddenly the curtains burst open
>"OOGA BOOGA"
>an entirely naked, oiled up Louis CK somersaults on-stage
>"TEENY WEENY WHITE PEENIES"
>the audience roars in excitement and begins rushing back to their seats
>"HEYOOOO DID SOMEBODY SAY BIG BLACK COCKS?"
>multiple audience members are trampled to death in the stampede
>"NIGGER DICK NIGGER DICK NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER DICK"
>the audience desperately tries climbing over the stacks of limp bodies at the entrance door
>Louis CK starts rolling around on the floor while screaming incoherently
>"HOWDY HOWDY ROWDY BUCKS"
>Tupac's hologram appears on stage and begins performing his new single
>"WE'RE GOING DOWN DOWN DOWN TO THE INTERRACIAL BREEDING GROUNDS"
>the surviving members of the audience begin rapping along with him
>Louis CK is frothing at the mouth while rolling around
>Neil Degrasse Tyson takes his shirt off and starts beating his chest
>in the far south, a white supremacist cartoonist in a cowboy hat suddenly wakes up from a fitful sleep
>"I sense... a disturbance."

>an entirely naked, oiled up Louis CK somersaults on-stage


lmao

memes aside,what the fuck is up with the last 20 minutes being jokes about him fantasizing about men?
>haha im secretly gay maybe!
that shit isnt funny

WU TANG CLAN AINT NUTTIN TA KEK WIT

>dimly lit stage
>low fire pits set up in a semi-circle
>Louis CK walks on wearing nothing but a loin cloth
>audience starts giggling
>"Ladies and Gentlemen, do you know what's behind this loincloth?"
>audience screams "No!" through stifled laughter
>"A very small, white penis!"
>Louis rips off the loincloth to reveal his tiny manhood
>audience starts laughing in earnest
>"Folks, admit it, white penises are inadequate to satisfy the sexual appetites of our women."
>audience starts nodding
>"But, I have a solution"
>Louis CK pulls out a knife out of his ass
>"I am not a man," Louis CK proclaims, "these are men"
>ten muscular black-as-night Africans come out of the shadows, their long dicks swinging
>women in the audience are ushered on stage
>men are given knives
>"I want you to face the facts"
>Louis CK ceremoniously chops off his dick
>a nearby African pulls out a scimitar out of a fire pit and cauterizes CK's wound
>Louis screams in agony and falls on all fours
>two Africans see their cue and start spit roasting Louis
>women from the audience are stripped and bred on stage
>white men in the audience follow Louis and cut of their dicks
>ushers are ready to cauterize them
>Louis swallows the load from the African in front of him
>"A NEW AGE HAS BEGUN"
>"IT IS NOW THEIR TURN"

i'm so sad this meme died so fast
blackedposting is so stale compared to this

Download link? I'm not a netcuck

More like Lous Cuck 2017 amirite

> so fast

It lasted 2 years minimum and we get threads like these a few times every month

>Audience wait in anticipation
>Three strong black bucks take to the stage and begin eying up the nubile white women in the crowd
>"We be gwan take AWWWW de lil' white women to de innaracial breedin grown, and dere be nothing you can do, no siree bix nood"
>Suddenly, from backstage!
>"No so fast, sambo!"
>Bursting onto the stage in his full Aryan glory, it's Louis C.K.K.K!
>With a right hook, he knock one of the jigaboos out cold
>"Getting real tired of your pickaninny whinny!"
>Wham! It's another strike for the white man as he knocks a second dindu to the floor
>He turns to the final colored, who's quivering in his Air Jordans
>"Looks like you're about to be the first black man on the moon - even if whitey has to put you there!"
>With a furious uppercut he knocks him clean through the roof of the stadium
>The audience are in uproar, they stand up in rapturous applause with tears streaming down their cheeks.

Nothing about this was as good as "he rapes but he saves." That callback was legitimately one of the best things I have ever seen in standup

>There's more to life than BBC
>*the audience lets out a confused cry of anger, some of the bucks in the front row start a disgruntled war beat on their Zulu shields
>Hey, HEY! don't get me wrong, I know BBC is great, but what I'm saying is, it's not just downstairs where black bucks are gifted,
>Black men are just naturally RIPPED, not like us flabby whites
>*there is applause and riotous laughter, a shout of "I KNEW HE WAS STILL A KEK!" cries out*
>Like seriously, it takes a white guy YEARS of his life, a truckload of steroids, and the diet regimen of a fanatic to even reach the level of an average Nubian buck's physique!
>*the radiant smiles of thousands of bucks can be seen glistening in the dark amphitheater, like so many stars in a galaxy*
>If black guys actually had time for all that stupid shit and weren't so busy pleasuring white women, well, we'd probably have an INCREDIBLE BLACK HULK on our hands.
>*the audience howls with laughter, the sounds of hundreds of redditors tapping on their iphoness about this epic pun can be heard*
>But I have to wonder if maybe this incredible strength and power can't be shared in some way
>*nervous murmurs from the audience*
>You see ever since my wife let me share some of the buck juice with her I've been feeling really energized, like I can really feel the African vitality just coursing through my veins.
>You know what? I could do with a pick me up right now, I want some pep on my palate right now!
>*dozens of black bucks get on stage to feed Louis CK their noble essence*

there's a reason that made you so uncomfortable, you've got some thinking to do son.

this, please

>>circuis performers ride their stolen bikes on stage

kek

...

It was really really funny, I liked it a lot

>A chariot with golden rims rolls up on stage being pulled by six malnourished white slaves
>Three slaves, chained together at the ankles, lift Louis CK off the chariot and place him on the stage floor
>They prostrate themselves as Louis steps up to the microphone
>A dozen gold chains and rosaries adorn his neck
>The entire crowd watches in silence, hearts pounding with excitement
>The remaining slaves place a feathered tribal headdress upon his ginger skull, before lying alongside the other slaves
>Louis CK stares off into the crowd, bucks as far as the eye can see
>They begin to tremble with excitement
>Louis CK holds out his hands - C U C K L I F E adorned across his fists in platinum
>The sheer tension in the crowd is palpable
>Two slaves emerge from stage left holding a water cooler tank filled to the brim with suspicious white liquid, followed by two large whip-wielding bucks
>The slaves place the jug in Louis' open arms before bowing and assuming the fetal position
>Louis turns the tank towards the audience, revealing the words "BUCK JUICE" written on the front in permanent marker
>He takes a big breath, turns the tank upside down, and begins chugging the juice, never breaking eye contact with the crowd
>With every gulp he sputters a bit all over the stage floor
>The bulls begin whipping him
>"ERRY LAST GULP WHITE BOY"
>Louis begins choking
>"CHUG CHUG CHUG"
>The whipping intensifies, a clear erection grows beneath his parachute pants
>Louis suddenly collapses on the floor
>The crowd gasps
>"Cuck King, NO!"
>He slowly stands back up, knees wobbling and semen dripping from his chin
>Louis grins wickedly and holds up the empty jug to the crowd, before collapsing once again
>The crowd explodes in applause, whistling and cheering
>"ENCORE, ENCORE"
>A second jug is brought on stage
>Louis looks up and sighs

>youre here forever, man! pace yourself

>If you find something disgusting it means you secretly like it

Liberal logic 101.

This literally would make a 10/10 comedy sketch. I fking love it.

It was cuckino

The calendar bit annoyed me because he was wrong. For a liberal he's very ignorant of other cultures.

>If you find something disgusting it means you secretly like it or are """"afraid"""" of it

>Liberal logic 101.

FTFY

>liberal is an insult now
So... this is the power... of Trump's America...

Have you seen a male liberal? They tend to be effeminate

>yfw it's statistically more likely for homophobic men to be secretly gay

Then again, why hate something that affects literally 0% of your daily life?

>someone implies you are a closet faggot
>s-s-shut up liberal!

never change america

>Killing babies! Wooooo!

You mean
>killing WHITE babies

the suit is really distracting. doesnt suit him.

this could also be blamed on gay men though, i HATE your theory

gay men in the closet bully gay men and then when they come out of the closet themselves everyone laughs at them for being gay, even though apparently theres nothing wrong with being gay all along

Show the statistics. It's not true. It also implies gay hate isn't real, it just means the person is probably gay themselves. So it's the LGBT movement working against themselves, which is something liberals tend to do a lot.

>liberal is an insult now
It's been that way for over 20 years.

>this could also be blamed on gay men though,
How? Gay men forced you to be gay by mere osmosis or something?

>It's not true.
sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/04/120406234458.htm

>It also implies gay hate isn't real
It implies gay hate is just internalized anger. Don't worry, it's 2017. It's okay to be gay, user.

Wow I wasnt aware that satire was supposed to be decades longer than the actual subject. Guess theyre going for the so ridiculous its funny bit. Real original stuff for Sup Forums, real biting commentary.

>To explore participants' explicit and implicit sexual attraction, the researchers measured the discrepancies between what people say about their sexual orientation and how they react during a split-second timed task. Students were shown words and pictures on a computer screen and asked to put these in "gay" or "straight" categories. Before each of the 50 trials, participants were subliminally primed with either the word "me" or "others" flashed on the screen for 35 milliseconds. They were then shown the words "gay," "straight," "homosexual," and "heterosexual" as well as pictures of straight and gay couples, and the computer tracked precisely their response times. A faster association of "me" with "gay" and a slower association of "me" with "straight" indicated an implicit gay orientation.

The only thing that the study confirms is that German and burger college students are closet homos, which is hardly a new development

Haven't really found him funny since Hilarious. His standup felt phoned in after that. Is this any different from his stuff since?

I really liked the part where he revealed he was wearing a cuck cage and said he sold his daughters to BLACKED.com

I'm black and I thoroughly enjoyed his most recent show. The best bit was when he talked about his daughters being thrown into the Interracial Breeding Grounds (IBC).

why do you think about black dicks so much?

what is with the whole "im gay" bit? is he seriously gay or something?

>suit

I thought he idolized Carlin?

it just seems that homosexuality takes up a lot of space in your mind while us normal heteros just couldn't care less about it.

really makes you crank the old thinknozzle

Homosexuality being accepted affects people's happiness, especially those that are pushed into being gay for being effeminate or being sexually deviant

>us normal heteros
kek

>liberal
americans and their pathetic buzzwords

it was the funniest bit

>especially those that are pushed into being gay for being effeminate or being sexually deviant
Huh?
>Be sexually deviant
>Therefore you get pushed into being gay/ sexually deviant
This doesn't make sense. Maybe if you would clarify.

With the effeminate part though, yeah. Even just plain unattractive or unable to perform masculinity to other people's liking can get a man labled gay or closeted. I remember when Eliot Rogers went nuts and killed those people. My mom saw him on the news and said "He seems gay to me." I told her that although he was trying to pull off a metrosexual look, gay guys don't usually go nuts because they can't get laid, which is the motive he expresses in his manifesto. My guess is that if a man seems revolting enough a woman's mind likes to absolutely ensure that he isn't a potential sexual partner by putting him in the gay category. Kind of the opposite of the "He can't be gay!" reaction they have when they're crushing on a guy.