How fucked am I?
I recently started smoking weed daily for a couple of months. Helps me with anxiety and my issues sleeping. I just passed an interview for a pretty good job, but they want to drug test. I've been sober for a week and still have a week and a half left to take the drug test. I'm 5'11'' 217lb.
not at all?
How do you figure?
u will fail ur test. you seem ightly overweight. weed thc stays in your fat. for 1-2 months depending on how much you can flush it out.
Ur fucked OP. The only way to beat test now is to do cocaine, and ur test will come out clear.
Yeah cocaine beats cannabis
Don’t listen to these faggots. Yes it’s stored in your fat cells, but that doesn’t go into your piss.
Go buy a few bottles of 100% cranberry juice and just drink that like crazy for a few days. The last day before the test, drink a solid gallon of water and piss as much as you can. Drink a few bottles of water before the test itself and you’ll be fine. 2 and a half weeks sober is plenty of time, I passed my last test with 12 days notice. 6’, 220.
What are some actual options I can explore? I know they test for the stuff thats stored in fat cells and excreted through waste (urine). I also see that many of them are privy to a lot of the methods to getting around it (diluting, flush kits)
How nigger do you have to be to smoke weed knowing that you're applying for fucking jobs? You don't deserve a decent job moron.
Don't drink to much water the day of or you will get a false negative
OP listen to this guy
Fucking exercise, sweat, pee, literally produce all the liquid your body will physically allow.
The thc metabolites will mount the cocaine molecules and be carried out of ur adipose tissue through urine route versus having only thc in ur system alone.
You can pass in 48 hours drinking a gallon a day. Eat red meat and take a vitamin with riboflavin to make your piss neon green. If its a slow release just crush it
t. parole
well what's the job?
only govt jobs, heavy machinery etc usually only test for drugs.
if it's the govt or large corporation then expect them to go for piss tests, in which case you're fucked unless you can do the old switcheroo with Fake Piss.
If it's just some minor firm then I doubt they'll have the time or money to pay for piss testing. they'd likely go for mouth swab, which is dirt cheap and easy to administer but you can be clean for it in 3 days.
Ok I think I'll go along with this. Thanks for the advice user.
OP ut safe just don't toke and brush your teeth dumbass
Network Engineer for a well known internet provider.
well that's fucking shit
if you have a friend with clean piss, get them to pee in a bottle, put that into a small container about 2.5 ounces, tape a hand warmer to it 30 min before test, put in undies, go to test dump in cup and turn in, you can also pee in it, dump out ur pee and wipe out first to fool the temp strip if worried, hand warmer works tho
My current job isn't bad, but this will be a 20k salary bump and much better experience for my resume. So, I'm a little stressed.
t. degenerate but an employed degenerate
Buy 2 10 panel drug kits at the pharmacy. Take one test now and another test early morning on day of test. Eat plenty a vegetables and juices. Exercise and stay off the drugs.
It's simple, stop snorting marijuanas
you can also get a fake urine test kit from a head shop.
How well do those actually work?
You have so much time to figure it out, that it doesn't matter what we say kid.
If u put weed up ur butt it doesnt go to ur fat tissue. U still get the same effect too
depends if they send it to a lab they can tell, if not you are fine, i would use a person with clean piss
pretty fucking good depending on the brand. But most come with hand warmers to keep it at body temp after yiu microwave it. Tape it to your thigh with some baggy pants you'll be good.
All the drugs you have ever taken are still lodged in your subconscious. They will all come to the fore whenever anyone mentions the term "drug test" to you.
On the other hand, drug tests are limited chemically to only those specific compounds they were designed to test for.
NO! do not take this Niggers advice. Working hard to "flush" your system will burn fat and calries and force the weed from your fat into your waste system through sweat, urine, and feces. This will 100% test positive.
Stay clear until the drug test. but be honest with the testing agency, that you did weed for anxiety, but have abstained for the past several weeks.
usually any place that requires drug tests will accept a low positive if you can justify and plead your case honestly. THey would rather hire the proper employee who is honest about his habits over some chimp that only got clean to land an entry level position.
I assume since you have already been clean for a couple of weeks you are not a chronic pot head, and can live without if the job really requires you to.
just be fucking honest and make better choices in the future. If you fail this test, don't start smoking more to "help you cope."
That would only fuck you further into the future.
when you go to take a piss, let the first bit go in the bowl and then piss in the cup. I hear if its in your urine then the start of your piss is the strongest
I bought someone’s piss in the lab parking lot. Poured into pill bottles and shoved them in my pants to take the test. Got the job. Believe me or not but I needed that job
When u take the piss test, walk out of the bathroom midstream and conduct test while in transit down the hall. Failproof method OP.
stop leaning on these bullshit excuses that you use it for “anxiety” and “help sleeping.” That’s just junkie logic. Be fucking honest, dipshit. You smoke weed because it’s fucking fun.
This. FUCKING This.
Also, learn to deal with stress and anxiety without the aid of a substance. They're natural human emotions. Anyways, try to drop some weight prior to the test. You're kind of fat and THC just sits in it
What kind of test?
Pre employment tests are cheap. Get clean piss and substitute it in the cup.
Or
Shit loads of water. Shit loads. You want to dilute your piss so much its water.
DoT they will either take hair or have a guy watch you. That one your fucked sorry mate.
THC cancels out THC OP. If u sprinkle kief in ur urine sample, 10/10 u will pass
Honest answer here. Drink a lot of water and do something active to burn some fat. The day before the test eat a ton of fatty junk and lots of water, make sure your piss test is like your 4th pee of the day and you'll pass. I've passed a dozen tests like that. Usually only sober for like 7-10 days before a test
Get the monkey piss and try to pass the test with that.
Otherwise you're fucked.
You're never gonna pass, you are going to be arrested on the spot when they find out you've been smoking weed and you will be charged.
Best thing to do now is to get clean piss or just don't show up.
cranberry juice but it has to be 100% juice hopefuly low on sugar. also drink water and you could buy Niacin pills and take those to help flush out your system