How close are masturbators to the real thing? I'm thinking about buying one to coom every now and then...

How close are masturbators to the real thing? I'm thinking about buying one to coom every now and then, when my animalistic instincts are kicking in and there's no dead hooker left.

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Other urls found in this thread:

amazon.de/gp/product/B07RT35S97
drugwatch.com/talcum-powder/lawsuits/
jydoll.com/jydoll-5ft5-168cm-big-breast-bertha.html
m.youtube.com/watch?v=K9p2vF2OKbs
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

10 cm is pretty sallow isn't it?

Get a Fleshlight and forget about everything else. Remember to get the powder too, you will hate yourself if you don't get it. Or you could use cornstarch...

nothing beats the real thing. nothing
1. pussy
2. ass
3. mouth
4. everything else

what is this product op i want one

It is but I don't want to buy one of those huge things. Besides that my dick is about 15cm

>10 cm is pretty sallow isn't it?
This is no more true than to say green is pretty long.

This.
It's the warmth and the feeling of woman juice around your cock.

Lucky you, able to go balls deep and all.

Not that you would know

What kind powder do you mean?

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Get something you can go balls deep in. Otherwise it's a complete waste

Those things get sticky, you have to powder them every few uses.

nice quads and he's talking about the talc powder that keeps it from feeling sticky

Most of those things on amazon are made for chinese dick and I haven't found one with at least 15cm, which isn't some huge thing

got one; doesnt feels that great. 3/10

SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THIS PRODUCT IS

K, thanks. I have only used my hand until now, so I know shit regarding sex toys

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OP they don't feel horrible, but here's the thing. To actually get a good use out of them you have to warm them up beforehand, clean them out immediately after, pamper them with powder to maintain the material, etc. You want to do all that? Didn't think so. At least a woman goes and cleans herself out after you nut in her. Far less post-orgasm work.

What's going to happen is you'll buy the toy grab it when you're horny fuck it all cold and weird, then can't be bothered to clean and maintain it. Then 6 months later you'll have an mildew smelling sex toy buried in your closet that you don't use.

But if you really can't get laid and think this is the life for you then go for it.

It's from the german amazon, but I'm sure there is some chinese seller on the US site or on aliexpress : amazon.de/gp/product/B07RT35S97

Dude, I'm fucking autistic and can barely hold a normal conversation with my classmates at university.

I wouldn't say that I'm bad looking but I don't bother going on tinder to get some disease ridden thot.

you know that shame that washes over you when you finish fapping
well multiply that shame by 100 and that's pretty much how you are gonna be feeling everytime you are cleaning that fucking thing of your crusty cum while wondering where your life went so wrong

Also thanks for the maintenance warning.

Lmao.

/thread

I started nofap already and I feel much better now. This will be the replacement for fucking my hand. I mean if I'm going to loose nofap, then I might as well enjoy it.

There are worse things

>talc
You should never use talc for anything. Talc powder contains asbestos and getting that on your body or in your lungs / orifices is a recipe for cancer down the line.

>I don't bother going on tinder
There's your problem.

Also stop worrying about the STD meme, it's really not a thing.

So how do I get to fuck if I'm autistic? Get a drink and ask her if she wants to deflower me?

This is not what abstinence from masturbation means

i do it in the shower, after i cum i literally just rinse it under the shower, finger it like twice so all the cum washes off ez

talc powder is 100% talc can u prove the asbestos thing

First you cure your autism
Then you have sex
>there's also another way
>you fully embrace your autism
>super autism gives you confidence
>better than keeping a facade of normalcy

It's OK. Almost the same. Warm your lube up ahead of time. I like mine at almost 100f

not him, he's probably referring to the ongoing talcum powder lawsuit
drugwatch.com/talcum-powder/lawsuits/

I don't like the idea of being fully on abstinence. I just fap every second week or so to kinda even out all those years of masturbating every day as a kid.

How do you "embrace" autism exactly?

No. Well, yes to the alcohol. But no to the rest of that.

First, pretend you have something going on for yourself in your life. It helps to actually have something going on in your life but pretending will work. That can be your career, hobby, whatever.

Second, talk about that thing. Not obnoxiously bragging but talk about it. Put it in your tinder profile. Write your profile as if you don't care who reads it and you probably can't be bothered to respond anyway.

When you talk to matches don't ask direct questions. Also do not compliment them, especially don't compliment their looks. Make an observation (one that did not take more than 10 seconds to arrive at) and use it to immediately segue into talking about yourself. Don't use proper punctuation. If you do ask a question, don't use a question mark. E.g.,
"I see you went to yellowstone, that's a good one. I think my favorite national park is xxxwhocares, where I did xxxshit"

The key is to get her interested in you, not to approach her about what you like about her or what you could offer her. Also make sure never to respond to her at predictable intervals. Wait like a day after the first message. Then randomly 2 hours or 12 hours. After about 4 messages, pick some random shit you've discussed and say "Sounds like we have that in common, you oughta come grab a drink with me and chat about it"

If she doesn't respond favorably, ignore her and repeat this process with another. Also practice drinking beforehand.

Oh yeah and do the boost thing on tinder. Yes it's bullshit to pay for it but it works. Because there are 100 guys on there all trying to match every 1 cute girl, and girls can only be bothered to swipe for 3 minutes at a time when they're bored, boosting your profile to the top of the que is sometimes the only way to be seen.

And don't 'super like' ever. Girls think it's creepy.

> how is talcum powder manufactured hurrr
is water 100% water?
is steak 100% steak?
I am constantly amazed at how genuinely stupid people are

Get one of these
jydoll.com/jydoll-5ft5-168cm-big-breast-bertha.html

>is steak 100% steak?
Um, yes.

And what if I don't drink alcohol myself? I'm no pussy but getting drunk is a nono for me.

> ass better than mouth
Ok buddy

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Honestly, they're almost as good as the real thing. I recently got a fleshlight as I'm doing a long distance relationship and I've got to say the only complaint I have is the maintenance issues (e.g. cleaning and powdering - which in hindsight isn't overly taxing, it's just not what you want to be doing after you just came)

Ass is better than mouth AND pussy, you summerfag

Dude if youre at least 5/10, do some hygene maintenance and arent a creep, autism doesnt matter. I had girls asking me out or sometimes basically telling me to ask them out in high school and after because I didnt get the cues. But I had hobbies and a couple friends, was in good shape, and tried to be a good guy to everyone. Wasnt even that confident or anything. You'll get someone dude.

I think ass to mouth is the best though

Uhh no. Pussy is best, bj is second.
You would know this if you had ever had any of it.

This gives me hope

>getting drunk is a nono for me.
>I'm no pussy
>what if I don't drink alcohol
>a nono
>I'm no pussy

Well I hate to break it to you but you're a big fat dripping pussy. You can try that formula and meet at a coffee shop or some gay shit like that, but your success rate will be far lower. Maybe take advice from someone who isn't an alcoholic manwhore, or enjoy pampering your jerk off toy and telling yourself it's the life you want.

guys guys GUYS

Ass is best because it's tightest and most degrading to women.
But sometimes pussy or bj is more fun, can't have ass all the time.
I have spoken and it is final.

How about she getting drunk and me being sober? How about that?

I just don't want to look like a creep doing it lmao

what about ass to mouth though?

No one wants to drink alone. It makes them self-conscious because they feel awkward being the only one getting buzzed, like they have to monitor their level, because you're both feeling it. Furthermore, if you suggest a bar and don't drink, she'll either think you're a recovering alcoholic, or a massive sperg. If you're not going to drink it's better to just not have alcohol involved.

Ass to mouth is also best, yes. Hard to find a girl willing to do it though. But sometimes I rub my dick on my girlfriend's face after fucking her ass just to be annoying. Then I tell her she's going to get pink eye.

>because you're both feeling it.
because you're not** both feeling it

lol imagine hiding a syringe in there xD

>Hard to find a girl willing to do it though
that's the best part. they don't want to do it so you have to coax them or force them to do it. ultimate humiliation

Is it bad that I fapped so much yesterday it became painful to maintain an erection?
I’m ok today, but man being backed up is no good.

Know how I know you're a virgin?

>How close are masturbators to the real thing?
nowhere close.
it's just a fancy and expensive way to make it feel different than using your right hand.
real pussy feels amazing but nothing beats a good blowjob.

know how I know you don't know what you say you know?

>bj second to pussy
Everyone, this is how you can tell someone that's never gotten a good blowjob before.

Big ones like that are too awkward to manuever

Theyre heavy ass deadweight as well as rubber covered in lube. Trying to heat the things up are annoying too.

A high quality single tube fleshlight style is better. They dont feel REAL but they do feel good as shitn

not wrong

What about if I'm just ordering gay ass alcohol free beer? Idk man, I don't like being drunk.

How are you supposed to "feel it" if you're fucking drunk and horny? There is no place in this situation for real feelings between strangers and just want to fuck

Horrible. Fleshlight or any masurbator with a hard outer shell is the only thing that will work to even come close.

>dick in the ass is more degrading then then sucking a dick. In prison ass rape is more like a forced punishment where as blow jobs are considered the most degrading cause your playing a more active role

m.youtube.com/watch?v=K9p2vF2OKbs

They’re okay. Not nearly as good as the real thing. I don’t think they’re worth the money.

On initial use it feels like 80% of the real thing but within a dozen uses the feeling rapidly fades away to where I prefer my hand. Unless you are willing to pay 10 dollars each masturbation session they are not worth it.

>What about if I'm just ordering gay ass alcohol free beer?
Very gay and all of the above still applies: recovering alcoholic or sperg, and she'll know it's not alcohol and feel awkward. Trust me on this shit.

>How are you supposed to "feel it" if you're fucking drunk and horny? There is no place in this situation for real feelings between strangers and just want to fuck
I know you're autistic and all but, holy shit are you autistic? "Feel it" in that sentence meant the alcohol. People like to drink together and believe that they're both feeling the same level of inebriated, that way they don't have to feel self-conscious if they feel uninhibited by it... because they believe you are too... that is the entire point of drinking alcohol on a date, you realize - to feel uninhibited. It's a 'social lubricant.' Also, don't start with the pretense that you are strangers who want to fuck. You're just talking and getting to know someone (but do try to get her drunk and fuck her).

Stop being retarded. More women like sucking dick than taking it in the ass.

he didn't ask which piece of rubber is superior to human intercourse, he asked if they were any good.

women ranging from sluts to prudes keep an arsenal of robot dicks and other phallic simulacra, and any rational person knows its far easier for women to get laid on a whim. why should a guy be limited to his hand or successfully pulling tail?

Women don't want to hook up. They want to be seduced.
Guys are rated by their ability to seduce women. A guy who fucks plastic instead has failed.

Meiki Sarah 007 is the closest to real pussy I tried so far.
Nothing can replace the feeling of an actual girl fucking you, obviously, but pure sensation-wise, that thing is godly.
A bit expensive and wears out rather fast though.

If you want the best wank for your buck, check out the Tenga 3D series, especially the spiral and pile models. Cheap, feels good, easy to clean, very durable.

Stay away from fleshlight, the apple of masturbators.

user stop trying to promote your shit here

you assume all women are self cleaning, and leave out that they are a lot of work and expense at every other hour of the day besides post orgasm

until we make proper sexbots nobody is suggesting getting a toy instead of trying to get laid, it's to allow for more diverse options in batin' when you wanna put in the effort and change things up. cleaning the toy isn't required the moment after you cum, but yeah i wanna towel the lube off my crotch at least.

in any case what harm can a new hygiene routine do for a single guy anyway? maybe maybe if you learn to apply the same level of attentiveness and care to other aspects of your life as you do your fuck blob you can eventually acquire a living fuck blob

>you assume all women are self cleaning
What? That's really a rather safe assumption. Have you met a woman that doesn't shower? If yes, hopefully she is not one you'd choose to fuck.

>learn to apply the same level of attentiveness and care to other aspects of your life as you do your fuck blob you can eventually acquire a living fuck blob
Yeah nah sorry to break it to you but that's not going to be how that works.

Not in the slightest lol

in no way does this address a single thing i said. how are women's toys seducing them, and why aren't men allowed to enjoy and explore with they sexuality when pleasing themselves as much as women are?

this feels like a personal attack

It does, you're just autistic.

It should.

Can someone explain this to me?

I've never felt shame after cumming. Ever.... not by myself, and not with a partner.

What is this meme?

The whole appeal of these is to simulate actual stimulation of a female. And the biggest thing missing is warmth. Trust me it’ll never come close and no I don’t think it’s worth because I’ve tried out of boredom. Still prefer fapping

if you're going for tinder hookups like some here suggest you have no clue what their hygiene is like, and douching, not showering, is the more comparable cleaning, or at least specifically cleaning out her junk. i knew a girl that would get a uti from banging a new guy if she didn't clean out after (even with condom, more to do with his personal biome being new to her immune system) but even she would get lazy sometimes, and not all women are that sensitive.. .

I think the shame part is only because anons are jacking off to traps and furry porn and shit like that, and briefly have a moment of perspective when they close all those browser tabs and clean up after nutting.

Otherwise there's no post-orgasm shame.

>you have no clue what their hygiene is like, and douching, not showering, is the more comparable cleaning
I've fucked a couple hundred women, and you are a retard.

Yes. Women clean themselves. No matter how autistic you want to get about the mechanism, women still clean themselves. Kindly fuck off now.

no, it really doesn't. you're just trying to make yourself feel superior to user's in a Sup Forums sextoy thread of all places by talking about how easy it is to get laid. at best you addressed the fact that my stance was pro sextoy with an equally abstract anti sextoy stance, but that's it. your commitment to avoiding genuine discussion or saying anything beyond "guys that use toys are autists" makes you seem like one of those cuck thread shills here to make white men feel more insecure. anyway there's only like the 3 of us talking here so i'm out

Here's a quick rundown of some weird shit I've masturbated to, or with:

>Jacked off using mustard as lube when I was a kid, obviously didnt work the way I hoped
>Fucked a warmed banana peel, was ok
>plenty of actual sex toys
>I've butt fucked myself with batteries, dildos, tooth brush handles, fingers, etc
>Cum to tranny porn
>Cum to /d/ type of material as a kid, not really into it as an adult
>Cum to incest hentai manga and incest porn
>Asked my gf to piss on me, cum
>As a kid I used to hump pillows and "fuck" stuffed animals by cutting a hole in the crotch
>cross-dressed as a teenager and fucked myself
>created my own porn
>cummed on figurines before
>fucked an ex 6 mo after we broke up because she was insane and I knew I could get the pussy again

So after reading that you probably imagine I'm a giant weirdo, but the truth is if you saw me on the street you'd think I'm a regular guy. I'm very clean cut, fit, 9/10 - 6 years with a 9/10 korean girlfriend, I had a great job for like 6 years and then I started my own businesses, I own a sports car, everything from the outside looks normal as fuck.

My gf knows about all that stuff btw. Still, I've yet to feel shame after fucking, cumming, or doing any kind of sexual activity. Am I broken? I genuinely just enjoy sex and never feel bad about any of it. Some of it I laugh at... but I never feel bad or shameful .

they are good for endurance training, spend the extra money and buy a warming rod.

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*sigh* fine king autismo let me break this down for you by going back to that post I first responded to

>he didn't ask which piece of rubber is superior to human intercourse, he asked if they were any good.
Actually both false. He asked if they are comparable to the real thing.

>women ranging from sluts to prudes keep an arsenal of robot dicks and other phallic simulacra
True
>and any rational person knows its far easier for women to get laid on a whim
True.
>why should a guy be limited to his hand or successfully pulling tail?
The difference is that, as I said:
>Women don't want to hook up. They want to be seduced.
>Guys are rated by their ability to seduce women. A guy who fucks plastic instead has failed.

>how are women's toys seducing them
This just goes to show how far off the fuckin' spectrum you are to not understand what I said. The dildo does not seduce a woman you retard. Yes, both men and women have sexual urges. Yes, women relieve those urges. The difference, once again, is that women don't feel the urge to go out and get laid. Men do. Women as a general rule don't lust after someone until she's already been seduced by him. Men are the pursuers, women are the pursued.

I'm not "anti sextoy," I'm just explaining to you, since you are autistic, and since you asked, the social perception of girls having sex toys vs guys.

A girl that fucks a lot is a whore
A guy that fucks a lot is a stud
A virgin girl is your little waifu meme
A virgin guy is a sad beta

Social stigmas exist. Yes they are generalizations, no they are not always correct, and yet they almost always exist for a reason. This is why people look at a girl with a dildo differently than a guy with a flesh blob masturbator thing. People find that in your nightstand and they will laugh at you. Deal with it autismo.

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>Meiki Sarah 007

where to buy?

Literally google it and it's the first fucking result

absolutely this.