>>be me. >>asked a co-worker out for drinks the other day after a rough black friday shift. >>She agreed and we met up at a local bar >>Start chatting it >>Sending flirting vibes >>I tell her I'm digging on her, she reciprocates. >>Dude comes up and says hello. >>She introduces him as 'friend' >>He seems cool, but starts handing on her and being super flirty with her. >>Get the vibe they are a couple. >>Dude starts cockblocking hard >>He goes to get drink >>Ask her if they were a couple >>She says that they are FWB, but that they aren't together and that she can date other dudes. >>Say ok, cool, whatever. >>continue chatting, going well >>Dude comes back, continues being 3rd wheel. >>She asks me to walk her to the bathroom (The bar was crowded, I'm a tall dude with broad shoulders, so I can navigate the crowd and open paths easily) >>Say sure >>Start to walk away >>Look behind me >>She's not there >>Look back at where we were >>Dude is full-on kissing her. >>I was pretty drunk at the time, so I blew it off because I was like, whatever, she said they were FWB. >>Later she walks me to my car, we make out, grab on her ass, its good times >>The next day, I sober up and think about the events of the night. >>Get pissed off because I felt disrespected.
Do you think I'm foolish for feeling like I got disrespected? I had just told her I was diggin on her, and then to engage that way..
I dunno. I've talked to a few people about it, and I'm getting mixed answers. I'm thinking about just dropping the whole thing and persuing another piece of ass, but this girl looks like fun to toss around in bed. What are your thoughts?
Too many games for me to take her serious, I'd simply move on
Damn you got cucked my friend
I mean, if they were already seeing each other from before hand and I'm new meat... isn't he the one who got cucked?
Yeah, that's how I see it as well...I'm thinking of just moving the fuck on and not even sweating it.
If i were you i would fuck only. She obviously diggs you and obviously is cool with sleeping around. I would never in a million years pursue a relationship with this girl and i def wouldnt hang out with her in a setting where im not 100% gonna smash.
Word. So just a fuck buddy. I can dig that. I just gotta move her out of that mindset of dating and just put her in the FWB category like this other dude.
You goofed so hard by not taking her home. She walked to your fucking car while another guy was there she could have fucked. Jesus this type of beta shit is lost on me. Also, she’s a slut so only bang her. No feels.
Nah, I couldn't take her home. I had to wake up early for work the next day and I didn't want her hanging around my place while I'm not there.
nah, you weren't disrespected because you didn't set any boundaries. that said, I don't think you SHOULD set boundaries with a coworker who you've gone out with once. honestly just stop trying to fuck her. cut your losses now. really not worth it. if you ever do set boundaries, she seems either like the type of chick to really not appreciate them or the type to not respect them.
Hmm.. good insight. Thanks.
The part where she asked you to walk her to the bathroom and she wasn't behind you, and was way back at the bar - that was disrespecting you. Forget about the fact that she was kissing that dude. She put you out of your way, and then thought nothing of hanging you out to dry. THAT is a clear sign that you should keep everything on a professional, co-worker basis with her. And maybe even be a bit more cautious around her. She has shown she's the type to hang you out to dry at a moments notice, and she might try to set you up for blame for something at work.
OP, don't listen to this neckbeard. He seems to think the universe owes him something.
Try this: Imagine it was a male coworker you were out having a beer with for the first time. His buddy walks up and introduces himself. They seem to be very good friends. Your coworker says to you, "let's step outside for a smoke." You say okay, start to walk outside, and look back to see your coworker and his buddy having a laugh over something you didn't hear. Do you feel disrespected?
You shouldn’t be disrespected like that
>Too many games for me to take her serious, I'd simply move on
Fuck yes I would feel disrespected. You don't ask someone to do something, and then immediately ditch them, letting them walk off thinking you're with them. What the fuck is wrong with you that you don't know that by now?
wow you're probably a riot at parties.
Had a girl like that once in my life. That girl is a winning lotto ticket. Have fun fuck her when you can. Never get attached though. Don't worry about the respect thing no one gives a shit.
things happen dude. it's not that serious. if the friends keep talking for like 10 minutes then i'd be like yeah wtf, but if it's just a quick aside initiated by my coworker's friend, why the fuck would i expect my coworker to say "SORRY I CANT TALK RIGHT NOW I TOLD user ID SMOKE WITH HIM."
>Why would I expect my coworker to say, "Sorry, I can't right now ..." Because they can't talk right now. They're on their way to do something. The world doesn't revolve around you ... waaait a second ... you're a girl, aren't you. That explains your conceited sense of self-importance which excuses you from common courtesy and from doing what you said you were going to do, as long as, you know, you just don't feel like it.
I’d say don’t pursue anything serious with her, at least not at the moment. If you wanna get in those walls, I think you’re in the clear. Her current dick was trying to cockblock so you’re fine for feeling disrespected, but if she’s vibing with you then she may be ready to move on.
Play it by ear, but don’t pursue if you want something serious. That’s my takeaway. Best to you, OP.
no. i just don't hate women or feel like anyone owes me anything. like i said, it depends on the length of time i spend waiting. there may come a point where it becomes more than a quick side conversation and i am forgotten about. at that point i'd feel disrespected. >the world doesn't revolve around you
when it comes to this chick OP is talking about, her FWB probably overheard her ask user to walk her to the restroom and to assert his dominance he probably grabbed her and kissed her as she began to walk away. think of the nature of women, particularly of sluts. what slut would pull away from this advance? it's a game of slut chess. you have to alpha up with your next move. or elect not to play, which is not a beta move by any means--unless you get mad.
Don't date or hook-up with co-workers. Stick to playful flirting.
don't shit where you eat she is your co-worker, that is already a red flag if she is behaving like this next to you, then you don't care to her do you really want to wastw your time with a girl like that?
OP here. Just got back from lunch. Thanks for all the advice. Yeah, I'm definitely going to just cut ties with her and stop fucking around with co-workers. Even though this IS a side job (My main source of income is Game Dev, I'm just working retail for some side cash to fund my comicbook).
It doesn't seem like it's worth the headache. Thanks bros!