> 24, mixed race american > went in military for 5 years because I told myself I wanted to be productive in society > fifth wheel in my job because teams were already figured out, basically learned how to look like I was working > social problems don’t improve, I’m alone for all five years > got major redpilled from my experiences, went on Sup Forums religiously after trump was elected, realize I’m not the only one in this situation > got out, realized how fucked things were w/30k in the bank > kick back a bit to finish my bachelors and pay for all of it, travel abroad, buy a Tacoma > down to $10k, no debt though haha > working dead end job while I wait to be accepted into grad school > live with my father > the optimism I try to keep on in front of everyone is slipping, depression is coming > my job is looking at peoples credentials in a cubicle environment while keeping a smile on my face, I see all the other people who’ve sold their soul for wagiehood > I can’t even stay hard in front of a woman when I’ve tried because I don’t feel power over my life > I’ve come to the point where I wonder if things are gonna have to be violent to get better, and if trying to get on with life like others is me sacrificing my dignity as a free man > I wonder if my whole identity here is being used in some giant hamster cage to manipulate young men into doing what others want
I don’t really know if my ancestors smile down at me
> heh, look at you with your opinion on things, I don’t need one > no one needs em, they cause problems yooooo
Sounds radical enough to me
Did that a bit, didn’t do much there. I did laugh my ass off in a smoothie store for no reason while my nipples got sensitive kek
You should do it again, but this time do stuff you just genuinely enjoy. If you don't enjoy anything, then try learning a new language, or learn how to play an instrument while stoned. It sounds like a small thing, but you need a goal to help yourself feel accomplished.
I’ve been singing and I’m getting a setlist together with a band actually, but my low self esteem makes me acutely insecure between practices that it’ll never take off.
That, and I’ve decided to make a YouTube channel for singing cover songs live in English, Arabic and Turkish, taping myself with an iPhone camera
>they cause problems >I don't need one >opinion on things And for your information, avoiding the pill dichotomy isn't demanding you be a centrist.
>> went in military for 5 years because I told myself I wanted to be productive in society i made same mistake but i worked there for 3 years and get kick out, 2 times deployed and they told me thanks user for your service but you have to see a doctor(they suddenly find mental illness). I moved back to my family back but all friends went to other cities and i all alone. I don't know what to do with my life, also shity job that's I hate
So you mean to tell me that you have low self-esteem with your band, but you're about to start a YouTube channel for doing cover songs?
In my opinion, I think you should do the YouTube thing as a hobby, and play with your band just for fun. You're still rich as shit and have a job. Who cares if your band takes off? Just work your 9 to 5 and look forward to what you do in your off time.
I guess centrism and apathy are synonymous to me now, thanks Sup Forums
I’ll be honest, I had an opportunity to get a great paying job on the contracting side, by my hearts not in it. I have one life, and I don’t want to spend it chasing after defense sector bux fighting wars I don’t agree with, seems disingenuous. I say this while working for rent a cops on a military base, so take it with a grain of salt
I mean that my self esteem is trying to butt in and I’m blocking it. Singing and performance seems to be my passion, more than pretty much anything. I want to see what I can get from the YouTube viewers, and I want to do my band. My grad schools paid for, so I’m just marking time.
I feel man. Making my own money and not being a wage Cuck almost turned me into a bloomer. I may be a degenerate for gambling but at least I have money
You'd better start unwashing that brain of yours.
Breitbart literally said he targets incels and gamers because it's easy to manipulate their internalized anger and focus it onto anything he wants. This is the foundation of the movie American History X, too
Anger destroys. Anger consumes.
Love is the only remedy.
What the fuck makes you a Doomer if you're starting to bloom?
I'm experiencing this right now and it's really hard
I moved cities to get away from the stressful relationships of my hometown
and now I'm just lonely :)
I wish we had communities, still. villages. tribes. Where are my people
I'm all warm and fuzzy inside. I love that you were brainwashed by an echo chamber containment board...re tacked onto a japanese cartoon imageboard.
You're getting exactly what you deserve. And you're exactly where they want you to be. To cultivate your pain.
I love it!!!!
Self employeds my dream, funny, considering my major
After Christchurch, I try to take a more nuanced position.
Love from my friend, parents and my siblings are the main thing that kept me from doing something more drastic. I want my dignity, and I know I’m the one who has to get it, which makes me find what it is in myself that I hate, which is a lot. A wasted childhood really puts a damper on things
Not here frend :) We’re everywhere, I’ve seen them in the army, my workplace, even at the fair haha. This place has got me through a lot of shit I wouldn’t have otherwise, especially women (female).
I'm not happy about my childhood either, but it doesn't exist anymore. It's just a feeling and an illusion now
If I constantly am thinking about my past, how can I experience life happening before my eyes? I know that's not easy, and I'm really bad at it myself, but it does make sense to me
when i dwell on the past, it hurts me without fail. When I can let those thoughts go, things feel ok again.
You can have your dignity at any point. It hasn't gone anywhere. It's always been in your hands and under your control. Dignity, much like pride or worth, comes from within
I wanna feel that love
>I moved cities to get away from the stressful relationships of my hometown but you choosed to be lonely >I wish we had communities, still. villages. tribes. Where are my people yeah that's would be great but let's face it most of us drink way too much >I’ll be honest, I had an opportunity to get a great paying job on the contracting side, by my hearts not in it. I have one life, and I don’t want to spend it chasing after defense sector bux fighting wars I don’t agree with, seems disingenuous. I say this while working for rent a cops on a military base, so take it with a grain of salt i liked work in military I wanted go 3-th time on deploy that's mean they have obligatory to promote me, well promoting in my country means you have to know peoples on right seats
I’ve condensed my childhood and adolescence into a trilogy I’m currently writing, so that’s why I’m stuck on it. Otherwise, I hope the degree helps with the future. I feel like I’m in my fathers shadow because he fought his way to the top from the slums, and I got “everything”, it’s really fucking with my identity. Not even the military helped with that