Come home

>come home
>walk in your mom's room
>see this on dresser
>what do Sup Forums?

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buy my fucking tendies what else

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Haste really really fast into the kitchen no fucks given injuring me on edges throughout the house. Grab a solid plastic bag large enough to bag this trove and haste back upstairs with bleeding wounds.

Turn 360 degrees and walk away

Bag it in in my plastic bag and watch around room if there might be more cash then run out of the house as fast i can down the street just far far away from moms presence. Grab the next taxi or whatever ask aggressively every goddamn vehicle to car me to the airport for one bill of 100

Finally slow down at the airport and calm myself knowing mom wont be around here fo sure. Get to the united counter and book my ticket to mexico city at the same day. Pay in cash and board the plane

My mom is unemployed and doesn't leave the house, so this is extremely suspicious. I report her to the police

Breathe deep the mexican air and remove my imaginary shackles of us suburbian life. Book myself into a cheap hotel and wait for the night for hookers and blow

American money is so ugly. Fucking change that shit to plastic already.

you dumbass, you blackmail her and ask for half

beautiful green papercloth bills with based slaveowners on the front. get rekt.

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exchange for euros, we don't handle shitty dollars

>get a lighter
> burn your half of the money

Its about sending a message

She's ready for a trip to vegas

Take 75% and invest it

I'm willing to bet have of that paper shit is couterfit, and the other half has been up a hookers snatch.

In the US, if you buy an airplane ticket with cash on the day of the flight, then try to board with no luggage, you're going to get the strip search. When they find the cash, they're going to confiscate it. First, it is illegal to travel from the US to another country with more than $10,000 on undeclared currency. Second, they're going to assume you're a drug dealer and just take that cash, or asset forfeiture if you prefer. You'll be in Mexico, broke and now running from your mom's boyfriend, because he is an actual gangster.

it's a photo taken in a bank by a vault teller.

>hasten
haste is a noun and hasten is the verb
you're already richer than you were this morning lilnigga

It looks like 5 - 6k

Ask my Mom where she got the moneys and what she's going to do with it. She's retired so she wouldn't need all them papes on hand.

Hope she gives me about $300

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most of it's also covered in coke too, shit's so cash. enjoy your fags n women on your money LOL

pay taxes

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More like 20k boi. Whatever just declare it at the customs. Done, nobody can do shit lmao "OH I JUST ASSUME YOURE A DRUG DEALER SORRY MONEY GONE" doesnt work this way. Threat them with a massive lawsuit then and fuck them hard, nobodys gonna take my cash away from me

>le cope

Plastic is superior, Amerilard. Try to keep up.

Ask her where the rest is

Take my weekly dump and use some to wipe ass. Grab a big chunk and go shopping at the mall