>20 years ago today
>friend’s mom takes me and friend to see galaxy quest in the theater
>sigourney weaver’s tits look great
>have a winter coat across my lap
>fap through my jeans
>blow my load down my left thigh just as the camera goes to a closeup of tim allen’s face
>shitcock.wav
>let’s try that again
>sigourney weaver loses part of her top sometime in the movie
>hard again in 10 min
>fap again in secrecy
>tits on screen as i cum
>success.bmp
>we leave theater after movie
>it’s cold as fuck as we walk to pizza hut
>cum on my leg starts to freeze to my jeans
>we get to pizza hut
>go in the bathroom to clean up
>frozen cum on my jeans crunches
>most satisfying sound and feeling ever
>20 years later (today)
>go see cats in the same theater with wife and our friends
>want to fap to taylor swift
>can barely get hard
>takes 20 min to cum to her nipple-less cat body
>movie was otherwise shit
>can’t cum again today because i am now 32 and nothing works anymore
>we leave and walk to restaurant where pizza hut used to be
>it’s warm out and hasn’t gone below freezing the entire winter so far
>no frozen cum in my pants
>just wet sticky stuff
>i go to bathroom to clean up
>realize i can never recreate that moment again
>sit on toilet and share with Sup Forums
>i miss pizza hut
20 years ago today
Fuckin global warming
and there´s still fags that deny global warming
This thread made my night
share this story with your kids so they know to cherish these moments.
Feel you bro
I just want someone to go to a climate protest with a sign that says "Cum won't freeze in my pants anymore! REEEEE!"
The fuck did I just read?
Had a friend who worked on the crew of his show. Typical Hollywood ego-fuck. Say Hi to him. Nothing. Anyway. A 3/10 greentext brah. Sigourney Weaver? Sure, maybe in her panties at peek puberty. Her face though, eh.
Goddamn, I feel this. I am almost 35 and my body has been steadily shutting down for the past 2 years - metabolism slowed, weight was gained, dick quit working correctly, and I developed asthma out of fucking nowhere. I have 3 awesome kids, a shitty fat wife, and I fucking hate myself and my life at least 85% of the time. You young bucks live it up for me, while you can...
*In Alien for the millennials.
Nobody gives a FUCKING FUCK about your ''friend'' who ''worked'' on his show you FUCKING PEDO
JFC, the amerilard diet must be fucking horrendous if you’re falling apart in your 30s. I’m 53 and my cawk is still a ferocious meat mallet in perfect working order.
9/11, would read again
Angry millennial! Kek. Yeah, I just decided to make all that up. Sure. Pedo? Oh, you’re an autist. What I meant was...WHEN SHE WAS IN ALIEN, THERE WAS A SCENE AT THE END WHERE SHE WAS IN A TANK TOP AND PANTIES. SHE WAS AN ADULT IN THIS MOVIE. WHEN I SAID “AT PEEK PUBERTY” I WAS REFERRING TO MALES WATCHING THIS MOVIE AND SCENE WHEN THEY ARE AT PEEK PUBERTY. DO YOU UNDERSTAND NOW?
Dipshit, 'global warming' isn't the buzzword anymore it's 'climate change'.
Way to assume, buddy. I'm Canadian.
Its hard to read all caps maybe you could explain it to me calmly
he did time in prison for distribution of yola
Kek!
...