Old anons

Old anons.

What advise would you give to a 25 year old?

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Go fuck yourself.

have a 401k

Don't marry young, and most importantly, don't get stuck with a woman your own age when the merry go round stops.

Don't be 25. Also look into insurance before you turn 26 if you're still on your parent's insurance. I got bit by a dog right before my insurance began again since I wasn't on top of my shit.

Kill yourself like you planned. It doesn't get better and it's not worth it.

I second this. Marry 5 years younger. You'll have fun with her longer.

Learn how to invest and start as soon as possible.

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Be selfish as fuck and focus on making money. Don't let yourself believe a girlfriend will solve your problems.

Make sure you enjoy jerking off to the thought of your girlfriend/fiance before you get married because that's the feeling you'll be working with for a long time.



Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

Take Chances. Apply for jobs you are too nervous for or fear your under qualified for. Fuck as many women as humanly possible. Never stop working out or taking care of yourself.

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Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; or never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
Bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
Never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4 PM on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you


Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts; don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours


Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself

Remember the compliments you receive; forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements


When you go back with someone for sex, if their house is a mess walk away. No really. Messy house, messy mind. Trouble lies this way.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
Life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don’t

Get plenty of calcium

Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t
Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t
Maybe you’ll divorce at 40
Maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary
Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance; so are everybody else’s

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them

Do not read beauty magazines; they will only make you feel ugly

Get to know your parents; you never know when they’ll be gone for good

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the
People most likely to stick with you in the future

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you
Should hold on

Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard

Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft


Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old-- and when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders

Respect your elders

Don’t expect anyone else to support you

Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out

Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85

Never relax around blacks.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it
Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth

But trust me on the sunscreen

Going to school is never too late.

Even when people seem retarded, always listen to them; you never exactly know their story and why they believe the things they do and what circumstances allow those beliefs to simmer.

Learn to cook more and more meals.

Your dreams are never out of reach, you want to be a doctor now? well it will take a while and you won't be a 26 year old doctor next year, but a lot of school is online and you have a lot of life experience to put on an application.

If you want your dreams make sure to place yourself in the position where you can accomplish them. I couldn't follow my dream as I couldn't find a career to allow me to both be financially independent and go to school. I worked hard and got enough money for rent, gas, and food. I got my security license and I went to school to be a lawyer, took me a while more than what the rich kids got but I got it.


don't worry about how long a career path to earning the most money will take, because if you spend too long thinking about it that's time you could have just been earning money.

Welp i should just kill myself
so long friends