What's the most painless way to kill myself?

What's the most painless way to kill myself?

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take an asprin and bonk yourself on the head with a big mallet or drop an anvil/piano from an apartment building

Gun cyanide.
But you shouldn't.
I once attempted.
Hope for better.

call your mother a nigger, but take like 2 advil first

cyanide bullets

Turning 30 this year, feeling like my best years are behind and I did nothing with them, it's all downhill from now on, I can do many things but can't get my years back, I feel like the only way to restart is to die and literally start over being born again.

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take an Aleve and moonwalk into a bus

Listen retard there is no afterlife.
There might be god somewhere but all religions are bullshit. You die you die.
This the only chance you got. Don't take it for granted.

quit being such a narcissistic little shit, you can't just fold your own cards and expect to have gained anything from this human experience. you will just teach yourself even rougher lessons next time.

Perhaps that's the answer, this is what I've been thinking about now, it's all BS, getting this old really gives one a sense of "this is the only shot you have".

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this is false, there is something after this.
all religions have nuggets of truth surrounded by bullshit

Maybe someday you get to fuck one of these k pop stars. Anything is possible.
Which idol do you like? I liks jimin.

How about completely ceasing to exist instead? God never asked me if I wanted to exist, He just created me, where does my wants factor in? What if I just don't want to be any longer? Everything is pointless not worth the trouble.

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take your mothers dildo, put it in your mouth and run straight in to the wall. eat some tylenol pm first though

I like Onew, Lucas, Jungwoo, Chenle, Ayno, Ace Baron and most importantly V.

Fucking one of them would be nice.

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leave the world a better place for the rest of us you asshole take them out with you

Based and Davispilled.

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Na man. Its all bullshit. Fool people to make money. All religions have wrong scientific claims. Which people mistranlate and misinterpret on purpose to make it seem like god is the truth. Its not weird that everyone believes in these bullshits. We are biologically hardwired to believe in bullshit. Because believeing in bullshit unites humans. Just like nationalism.

religion clouds the mind of reason through superstition.

my beliefs come from a near death experience and i've been making sense of it for the last 18 years.

we don't ever cease existing, we're here to develop ourselves spiritually/be good people taking the zen/monk pill and going off to a monastary is basically a cop out, we're here to struggle. im about to be 38 and just went through a pretty bad bout of the suicidys lately too. crying for myself because i constantly compare myself to others when i am so much better than them, its all narcissism, thats all it is. your parents would miss you too faggot

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I once attempted. But i am a chanced person now. Now i never think about suicide.
Watch the movie forest gump. It has some great notions about suicide. You will learn something.

religion is the bullshit that surrounds the nuggets of truth that i was talking about

you are a very young fool, you'll see one day.

Do your research man. All of the smartest people and inventers are atheist. What does that tell about religion.

My negrump. If you're worried about the pain of killing yourself clearly whatever is bothering you ain't that fuckin bad

poor guy

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dude.. for the 3rd time i AM saying that religion is BULLSHIT that ruins the messages of cool dudes like jesus, not much that he said can be argued as NOT being good, the religion is garbage though.

Your logic is i am young and inexperienced thats why I dont believe in jesus.
How about the cold fact that all of the oldest and popular scienctists and smartest people were atheist.

I am ex muslim. Islam is a facist cult disguised as a religion.

>we are here to struggle

Why? Makes no sense.

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Most historians thing no one named jesus ever existed. To each his own.
My knowledge is in islam.

Religious retards logic is god tests us through stuggle to see our purity. Which is nonsense.when you believe in something hard you logic gets blined by it.

What was it like user? What did you see? Got any practical advice?

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my beliefs come from an epiphany I experienced on Lsd. God is an alien. raelism is the only true path.

to develop and grow, for the experience, to be better, to help others not to

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It does sound like a cope, just to cope with the suffering. If God is all-knowing he wouldn't need to test us.

Why not create us already great and perfect? Why spawn us in reality as level 1 critters?

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i honestly don't know much about him either.
but like Mohammad was a pretty chill guy who probably said cool stuff and had knowledge, right?
but islam its self is a death cult, the "prophets" were just philosophers who's followings got out of control

Yes, if you don't fail.
No. Cyanide inhibits cellulose C oxidase, which is essential for cellular respiration. Essentially, your body dies before your brain does and your organs shut down before you're unaware. You stroke, seize, asphyxiate, shit your pants, all at once. No bueno.

The true answer is a heavy opioid: Preferably heroin, most forms of fentanyl, or one of the stronger morphine analogues such as desomorphine (pharmaceutical grade, none of that Krokodil shit).

t. suicidal heroin addicted medfag

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there is great suffering in this world.
suffering and pain spreads fear of what hurt us, then spreads hate for what made us scared.
pleasure and happiness have the greatest power to end suffering, fear, and hate.
but only through suffering can you get closer to Jesus on the cross
and so pleasure becomes Sin, while terror and hate become ideals

now thats the big question... idk, maybe we are "god" experiencing itself?
maybe we are beta testers for the universe?

*cytochrome C oxidase

I'm fucking drunk, user. Don't take this as medical advise but I'm big on the right to die. Happy journey.

Nembutal is the holy grail to add to the opioids but good luck. Anything you take orally you may throw up so score some haldol or something if you're too pussy too shoot (hell, even snort it).

Shooting up smack feels amazing though, so if you want a blissful exit that is my rec.

Its true. But someone can prove it otherwise.
That's why my argument isn't about god. It's about different religions. I examined a couple religions and found out that all of them are fakes.
Even if god is real he never contacted us.
Because all of the religions are made up. Not messages of god.


i had a mushroom trip where i came to realize we are just dreams of a great cosmic spider who's single foot created our universe alone.

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Place an explosive under your pillow that will go off in the middle of the night when you're asleep

Thanks user, will take note.

Well in that case I'll just live to watch the world burn then.

Yeah reality isn't as simple as religion makes it out to be.

Thanks user.

That sounds quite interesting actually.

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I think if there were a God and you told him you really didn't want to exist he/ she/ it wouldn't hold you captive. They'd mercy kill you

I am an ex muslim. Mohammed was no fucking chill guy. He was fucking barbaric king racist rapist hypocrite sexist slavemaster and so on. Do your research and you will find it all.

On the contrary modern day muslims don't know about those barbaric things. They are chill people. because they don't read the quran(bible) and hadiths. They think islam is peaceful. On the otherhand terrotist arent really extremists. They are the actual islam. The normal one are the liberal ones.

For example i cant come out as an atheist and leave islam because vigilates would murder me and my parents would disown. And im also bi.

bottle of rum in the bum

Say you have enough evidence to put Hillary Clinton in jail.

Be fully sure about your ideologies and beliefs before you die.

If you can't find something to live for, better find something do die for.

>What's the most painless way to kill myself?
Vote Republican.
You (along with 99.9% of America) will slowly descend into poverty, only to die of terminal acne or some other preventable bullshit because, now only billionaires can afford healthcare.

"any random actual human 2020!".

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Donald fag trump too. Should we

Do you have access to a space craft air lock?

Walk in front of a train.

get naked, call the police and tell them you're going to kill yourself.
when they arrive, run at them with your hands over your head.

>Say you have enough evidence to put Hillary Clinton in jail.
If anybody could actually prove she ever did anything wrong, Trump would have put her in jail years ago, just for the applause.

MEANHILE, she's still free, because there's no evidence sufficient to convict her.

PS. check this bullshit out:
...donnie J been in hot water for over half a century

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Do you have a gateway to another dimension in the basement of a government facility near you?


Helium tank with an attachable breathing mask. Should cost less than 50$ on Amazon.

Seeking help and not taking your own life. It is ok to ask for help, user. We all need it at some point in our lives.

Can a friend loan you a new Russian submarine for you to pressure test the hull on?

Helium keeps coming up so I'll give it a look.

What help can people give me? No one, NO ONE can make me younger.

>And im also bi
Based, am bi as well, have some kpop abs fren.

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pop some 5mg melatonins and drink some liquor by the train tracks.
make sure to pass out on the tracks.

open a window enough to run a hose from the exhaust through, start the car, put on your favorite music and fall asleep

be me
be 19
tboned by drunk driver who was going 50mph through a red outside of "club" brother was a drug dealer
see car spin out and his truck slam into a pole
all from above
appear in a clean well lit kitchen type setting with my friends familys friend jeffery
he says hey user, whatre you doing here? you're not supposed to be here yet. in this old gay kentucky accent
don't remember much else about the experience
weke up from coma weeks later and my mom tells me that jeffery passed a few days before my accident.

i came back vegetarian and had the ability to write music after that. what makes me believe that i had gone to another plane of existence was that i actually had been declared dead and revived and that jeffery was not very involved in my life and i hadnt thought of him in a good 3 years, had i ran into all my old dogs and grandparents i might believe that it was all in my head, the product of the last bit of dmt being released in my brain or something but it wasnt.

Helium is the best because it's quick, it's totally painless, it's easy to rent a helium tank from a hardware store, and it does not leave a mess for some poor bastard to clean up

Tie ribbons around both wrists.
Put underwear on outside of regular clothes. Go to your nearest mail box, and post yourself a self portrait.
Now go to a bus stop, and catch the 3rd bus. At second stop, get off and apply KISS makeup. Now call a friend to pick you up, and buy them sushi to say thank you. Let them leave without you, because you just didn’t want to eat alone. Remove outer underwear and leave as tip. Walk home.

>now only billionaires can afford healthcare.
Wouldn't that require that only billionaires would be working in the healthcare industry?
It seems like it would be pretty based if republicans could turn every single nurse and lab geek in the country into a billionaire.

>be me
>too stoned to remember to read what i wrote before i sent it

>i came back vegetarian
Might as well KYS

Eat a tub of shoe polish

problem is that hardware store helium is doped up with oxygen, so it will not kill you unless you purify the helium and purge the oxygen from the tank

I want to listen to k pop but it has stigmas around it. Only girls are allowed to listen to kpop. Cause they are feminine. My sisters an Army.
Lgbts are very oppressed in here. No laws prohibit it but viligilantes will murder you in a second . So i cant ever come out as bi openly.

No it's not. Buy welding helium or food grade helium. Those are 99.999% pure. I don't know what kind of helium you've seen that's doped with O2 but welding helium has to be pure to be useful and food grade helium is guaranteed pure.

Eat a cup full of beanbag beans.

it was also something i thought about the entire time i was in a hospital bed, futurist shit, they will not have a cattle ranch on a space station, not for a while anyhow, and meat consumption is horrible for the planet.

rolling for this

Go to Haiti.
They will take care of the details for you.

So this amnesia of not remembering this other plane is all on purpose? I really hope they have answers on the other side 'cause I'm going there very angry, what sort of sick test or game is this?

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exactly this!

>So i cant ever come out as bi openly.

I feel ya brother. Hope you can one day find freedom and independence.

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It says right on the description that it is a helium/air mixture and if you look on the manufacturer website they specifically say they have to add air because of global helium shortages and can only guarantee 80% purity which might not kill you but might cause long term brain damage instead.

but i have a tesla

meant for

That's balloon helium. Don't buy that.

>the most painless way
carbon monoxide poisoning from a charcoal barbecue grill ~ smells great, and you just fall asleep, forever

whew checked
yeah apparently its just that, amnesia. life is considered the cosmic joke in zen Buddhism or something.

stay on Sup Forums


man those numbers wow!!
the meaning of life is to Learn as much as we can and to love unconditionally

That is the only helium regular hardware stores sell.

That is not an easy to rent item from a local hardware store and you probably need special certifications to order it.
Show link for easy to rent pure helium from a neighborhood hardware store like ace that it was implied OP should visit.

ok so buy argon instead or buy helium from a welding store? not sure why this is a problem

Anyone can buy a welding machine and any welder can rent 99.999% pure welding gases including argon or helium both of which will work just fine. And if that is still too hard for a 30 year old to manage, just hook a hose up from your car exhaust and use carbon monoxide.

I can see why you want to KYS, you're fucking useless.

Just helping clarify for OP so they don't become brain damaged because you gave them shitty outdated advice about hardware store helium.

That's great! I've been looking for new techniques to control my girlfriends


OP here, thanks for correcting the bs.

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