>walks onto stage holding a beaker
>*applause*
>"some people may think climate change is just a THEORY"
>camera pans to adam savage from mythbusters tied and gagged to chair
>bill chucks the beaker straight at adam and it explodes. blood and glass now embedded into his face while he silently sobs
>"those people need to be stopped"
>*audience stands and applauds*
>"computer models say by this time next year florida will be under water"
>audience gasps and looks around at each other for emotional support.
>"thats right folks its happening right now we are all going to die unless we stop climate change denial"
>bill shuffles over to adam who is sobbing and then produces a orange from his lab coat and show the crowd
>the crowed "oooooo"s at the bright orange object and claps a bit
>bill gets right in adams bloody face and asks him
>"hey adam what kind of science is climate change"
>adam is clearly scared and fucked up
>the crowd gets angry. shouts of "answer him" and "coward" are heard off stage
>adam manages to get out a "s-sett"
>"Whats that adam what did you say?"
>adam passes out from the pain of hours of torture
>bill immediately squeeze the orange on his face and he immediately wakes up screaming
>"THE ANSWER YOU PIECE OF SHIT WAS ITS SETTLED FUCKING SCIENCE ADAM, CLIMATE CHANGE IS SETTLED SCIENCE"
>adam continues to cry
>"folks some people just dont learn"
>Audience laughs and it turns into standing ovation
Walks onto stage holding a beaker
Other urls found in this thread:
youtube.com
grist.org
twitter.com
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How is this motherfucker not a Jew?
>Looks like a Jew
>Talks like a Jew
>Thinks like a Jew
>Acts like a Jew
HE'S A FUCKING CRYPTO-JEW
...
...
...
>memetexting on facebook
absolutely embarrassing
UPVOTED!
Why the hell is his neck so small
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lmfao
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...
this is like big bang posting / sheldon posting
I approve
we need oc
please contribute
hi /sci/
nye posting is on par with louis ck posting
come on guys wheres your OC
Adam Savage publicly stated that he believes in climate change multiple times
>Bill Nye shows up on stage riding a Segway with periodic table decals plastered all over it
>crowd cheers and starts chanting BILL BILL BILL
>"Alright guys, we're gonna do some SCIENCE!"
>crowd erupts into a frenzy
>electronic dance music starts playing as Bill mixes two flasks of identical looking liquid and produces a blue solution
>the audience is turning genderfluid nonbinary as he's doing this
>"As I mix these two compounds, I want to remind you that, just like this liquid flask I'm holding, race is a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT!"
>chants of Black Lives Matter roar through the audience, whites are checking their privilege en masse
>suddenly a voice from the back of the audience says, "But I have data proving there's differences in IQ between the races!"
>the music stops
>the crowd turns immediately silent
>"Who said that?" shouts Bill Nye as he steps off his segway. "Who fucking said that?!"
>A lone white male stands up in the audience, with two charts showing intrinsic differences between the races
>"The facts speak for themselves! Blacks have lower IQ even when adopted by white parents!"
>deathly quiet tension in the air
>suddenly somebody starts chanting "Hate facts, hate facts, hate facts!"
>the crowd joins in
>they start encircling the white male, their chants getting louder
>a Pansexual Fairy Sprite starts screeching and hissing in demonic tongues about privilege
>this is the signal for the crowd to rush the poor white man and tear him limb from limb
>as this happens, Bill Nye drops his pants and starts masturbating at the carnage, using the flask he was holding earlier as an anal pleasure tool
>the audience joins in and partakes in a massive orgy of semen and the white male's blood
>in the midst of this, an AfroAsian queerkin finds the papers used by the white male and burns them with his bong lighter
>crowd cheers at this spectacle
>Bill Nye shouts, "That's science!"
>roll credits
no he didnt
>It's season 3 of Bill Nye Saves the World
>The highest rated show ever
>The show is so successful it has ushered in a new era of prosperity for the United States
>The roaring 20s are happening again
>Season 3 has been great
>Everyone loved it
>99.7% of American households report watching it
>Religion has been wiped off the face of the earth
>Climate change is real and everyone donates to the Bill Nye Fund to help stop it
>The US government formally recognizes 853 genders, with more added virtually every day
>Trump got lynched last year, and now-president Degrasse Tyson personally held the noose
>The audience holds its breath in anticipation of the season finale show
>He enters the stage
>Crowd goes wild
>400 babies are conceived and immediately aborted
>"Who's ready for some science?"
>Collective orgasms can be heard across the country
>"Because today"
>World peace would have happened if it wasn't already a product of the show by season 2
>"We"
>The crowd prays to nothing in thanks for this gift
>"Are talking about"
>A Mexican family vaults the border wall as ICE agents cheer them on, the show playing on a massive TV screen embedded in a nearby hillside
>"How race"
>The four remaining Christians in obscure parts of the world commit suicide
>"Is actually not real"
>The 104% LGBT crowd gives a standing ovation
i like this
>400 babies are conceived and immediately aborted
audibly keked hard
BILL NYE THE (((SCIENCE))) GOY
please guys i am cracking up
> Sneaky music comes on
> Bill tip toes out from behind the curtains around the stage.
> The audience says "Huhhhh??" in a collective gasp, not knowing where Bill is.
> Bill is in his Nyddler outfit, what could he be up to?
> Tip toes behind little 8 year old girl in the crowd.
> Bill taps her on the shoulder and she turns around
> "ITS SCIEEEEENCE TIMEEEEEEE!", Bill says as he punches the little girl right in the nose, breaking it
> The audience gasps as the girl screams, blood splurting from her nose
> Music suddenly changes, whats happening? Bill is transforming
> Bill rips off the Nyddler outfit and reveals his classic Bow Tie outfit
> "Ooops! That was just my body was identifying as the evil twin, The Nyddler! Science folks, science!"
> Bill begins to laugh and the audience laughs with him and begins applauding
> Electronic dance music comes on, and Bill dances his way back to the stage
> Record scratch, cut music, zoom in to Bill's face
> "Lets get serious!", Bill says as he turns his head sharply towards the camera
> Bill pulls out out a torch and lights a flame
> "This may look like a fire, but its actually a result of a chemical reaction!"
> Biiiiiig ooooooohhhh from the audience
> Electronic dance music comes back on
> Bill freezes, then throws the torch to the side
> Bill begins dancing, as the torch lights part of the set on fire
> The crowd gives standing ovation as they chant "BILL! BILL! BILL!" (The little girl still bleeding)
> Members of the audience begin to catch fire and die as Bill is dancing away in the back
> The audience, despite being on fire, continues to clap and chant Bill!
has anyone's career nose dived faster without raping someone?
Daily reminder that climate change being caused by humans has yet to be proven
I like this
I missed Louis Cuck King threads, this has been a nice reprise
holy fucking shit dude.
I thought i was doing a good job
>the number of female nurses is ok though, thats just how it is
>the number of male garbage collectors and roofers is ok though, thats just how it is
better, its good for the northern hemisphere
>there's more science in shows for kids in the 90s than a science show for "adults" in 2017
Why are you faggots even making threads about Bill Nye. He is obviously beta cuck incarnate. And probably a fucking jew shill
stop complaining. Its the dawn of a glorious new meme
Alright, so what happened. Why are there Bill Nye threads everywhere?
Tru quote
Libbies went a little too far with their "entertainment" and now even normies are starting to become suspicious
Ah, the face of the communism shows itself.
>being so contrarian that you abandon any form of rationality
wew lads
bill nye is a meme, but you guys are retarded
His new Netflix show turned out to be an undercover tumblr operation.
And by undercover, I mean they are waving their gender neutral genitalia in your face.
Stay triggered cuck.
>only 853
Thats a far cry from INFINITE. Didn't you see the marble episode?
>A beaker is tossed onto the stage from somewhere
>A cloud of smoke fills the area, which Bill steps out of
>Crowd cannot believe their eyes, begins chanting BILL BILL BILL!
>"ENOUGH! I have to show you something, something very special."
>Crowd "Ooooh"s, begins flapping their large healthy arms.
>"Today I prove without a doubt that there are Infinite genders. INFINITE! What a big number, huh?"
>"Tyson please bring the bag"
>Neil Degrasse Tyson hurries over with a large sack
>"This bag contains marbles that are either blue or red"
>Audience is concentrating intensely trying to process this information
>"NOW WATCH as I grab TWO marbles from the bag without looking"
>He grabs a red and a blue marble.
>"AHH! A CIS MALE!"
>Crowd screams
>throws the marbles on the floor like there diseased
>"Whew, that was close! You see a person can have any number of sex chromosomes from 2 to well...Infinite! A spectrum of genders!"
>"Lets try again, hopefully I get something GOOD this time", Bill chuckles
>He grabs a large handful of red and blue marbles.
>"Yes. Now this here is a genderqueer demifluid intersectional bisexual transage otherkin.
>Crowd cheers so loudly it vibrates at the resonance frequency of concrete
>"Not again. Every time", as he grabs his emergency oversized quadcopter drone and disappears out through the new hole in the ceiling.
...
Goddammit. I'm so sick of this shit.
Our country is falling behind everyone else in education because we keep propping up all of these mediocre women for diversity points while all of our male geniuses and prodigies are buried working in warehouses and accounting because the American education system unfairly favors girls over boys.
Female scientists and geniuses are outliers, minorities. Women average out. Men cover the entire spectrum. As a gender men produce more geniuses on average than women do.
...
kek saved
>colbert walks on stage
>audience applauds
>Heh oh, yeah, sure, yeah hehe.. uh..
>audience quiets down
>So uh, heh, uh... so, yeah...
>puts hands in pockets
>Hmmm, uhh..
>paces towards camera
>Yeah... so... umm...
>a slight growing hum can be heard from the crowd
>... Donald.......
>the audience collectively prepares themselves with such force that it sucks all air out of the room, producing an environment similar to the vacuum of space
>colbert licks his lips slowly, the saliva immediately boiling due to the difference in pressure
>a few people begin to experience dangerous side effects, some go unconscious
>colbert, unphased, closes his eyes in dismay as he prepares to speak once again
>... Trump.
>the audience's collective groaning sigh causes the room to rumble and the building's foundations to sway
>dust drops from the ceiling as the rumbling continues, light fixtures drop to the floor and shatter
>the shards of glass shoot out towards the crowd, killing several people instantly and leaving some with gaping wounds
>a large glass of water on a stand drops to the floor near a broken light, extending the current
>one of the stage crew accidentally slips and lands in the puddle, taking several thousand volts into his body and frying his brain
>the rumbling ceases immediately
>colbert smirks
>I mean, really?
>the audience laughs as the dead crewman's body catches on fire in the background
Your reckless burning of fossil fuels may have halted the next ice age, Mr. Carlson...but I'm about to show your four children just how COOL settled science can be.
>atheist pod
kekkle doddle do
>Marie Curie
You do know that she's a fake scientist and used her husband's work as her own, right?
It is obvious that she didn't know jackshit about nuclear radiation by her death. She worse a radium pendant around her neck and died from radiation poisoning.
saved
I still fucking hate these liberals thinking that liberalism is in any way leftist.
>half the population is women
Wait, how do we know that? Did we ask everyone in the world what gender they identify as? It really depresses me knowing we polled the world and at least half of the people identified as cisgendered. I thought we had evolved. I thought science had won.
all leftists deserve free helicopter rides desu
It's the same shit and you all deserve helicopter rides.
Why is she such a smug slut?
Does this """"""""""""""""""scientist"""""""""""""""""""""" completely ignore sexual dimorphism?
Men get into science because they're biologically predisposed to like technical things more than woman do.
This is the definitive Bill Nye copypasta, everyone else go home.
It's exactly the same. It happened when the leftists stopped caring about the working class and started calling them "uneducated bigots".
>Walks onto stage in front of 4 mannequins with assorted sex toys attached to them.
>Hip music begins playing from the DJ dressed as a banana
>Music softens
>"It's 2017!"
>Crowd goes wild cheering, hooping and hollering.
>Grabs the suction cup dildo off the first manequin and drops pants.
>Crowd begins Arsenio Hall chants
>Wearing womens crotchless panties.
>Shoves dildo up his ass and begins fucking furiously.
>Crowd begins chanting "Bill, Bill, Bill, Bill"
>"All the primitive notions of tact and shame no longer matter, because its 2017!"
>Crowd furiously applauds
>Begins masturbating his flaccid cock.
>Crowd begins masturbating with him
>"We are now in a time that all degeneracy should be encouraged and welcomed"
>Crowd begins fucking each other
>Cock is now fully erect, it stands like a 3 inch heat seeking missile, which is massive by liberal standards.
>Crowd collectively cums
>Bill begins to cum, as he cums he yells "MUH GLOBAL WARMING!"
>Bills cum covers the audience like a firehose.
>"And that is what will happen when our Ice Caps melt next year, there will be no place to run and hide from the coming disaster"
>Crowd gives standing ovation
>Banana turns up the music
>Bill runs over to banana and begins dancing
.Gif related.
Spoken like true politically-illiterate classcucks. Liberalism is a right-wing ideology, the people you call Conservatives are actually liberals and so are the people you call Liberals. They're both right-wing capitalists.
That's liberals trying to divert the discussion from class. It's actually documented that the FBI was behind subverting feminist movements and turning them into the idpol-infested garbage bins we know them as today.
> And probably a fucking jew shill
>>"probably"
user....
>classcucks
Ahhh here we go.
Found the delusional marxist teenager.
Taking over the means of production will not benefit you. You won't gain any increase in consumer goods. The working class already consumes 99% of all consumer goods. Taking over the means of production will not magically change this.
Just stop being a socialist already. For fuck sakes.
It's just a tv show you morons
>That's liberals trying to divert the discussion from class
There literally isn't a single party or a movement talking about class struggle.
You know who does, and who does accept the working class and gives them a new sense of purpose and pride? National-Socialists do. The future right, m8.
People completely forgot he said this
This is just a thread on Sup Forums you dongus.
Has one man ever triggered Sup Forums so hard so quickly? There's like 7 fucking threads up.
We just need a way to synthesize Nyeposting with Baneposting
This is way too good.
You're a big cisgender.
Why does television trigger the neckbeard so?
>bill nye opposes and scaremongers nuclear energy
>cleanest, safest, and most realistic alternative to coal and oil
>literally more people die from falling off of roofs installing solar panels than from nuclear energy
>this guy is supposed to be a science educator
This triggers me more than gender politics bullshit
Your point being?
>There literally isn't a single party or a movement talking about class struggle.
That's because the discussion was diverted...
THERE ARE 14 FUCKING THREADS UP ABOUT BILL NYE RIGHT NOW
JUST MAKE A FUCKING STICKY ALREADY
This. I cannot take seriously anyone who claims to support "alternative energy" but opposes nuclear. That IS the alternative energy.
Where did all the Nye memes come from? Did I miss something?
...
people died from radium poisoning all the time back then. hell, lipstick used to be made partially of radium.
fucking dunce. and others stole curie's work btw.
Has humanity peaked degeneracy? You know what...Nevermind, I don't even want to know the answer...