Have you ever tried stand up comedy?

Have you ever tried stand up comedy?
how did it go?

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Once.
Two sets at a Michigan club.
Nailed it on white night, bombed on black night.

Tried it in 2010 at an OMN. Got booed off the stage during my first joke. I didn't even get to finish it. This was in San Francisco. It wasn't even a bad joke. It was about how certain cultures have no true human feelings and eat dogs. I didn't even specify.

I do stand up regularly at a local club in NJ.
I do fine, helps that the crowd is mostly white.

Hacks.

I've thought about it, but I'd have to try it in a town I'm just visiting, because I couldn't bear to bomb in my own town. I've listened to Steve Martin's audiobook about his stand-up years, and I'm a huge fan of stand-up comedy. I think I'm funnier than a lot of the hacks I see on TV, but then, I'm sure everyone thinks that.

Stand up comedy isn't Sup Forums
fuck off

I've never done it, but I keep a text file of routines that I write in if I think of something funny

Never know when I'd use it but at least I'm prepared

I've tried lay down comedy, all of my exes seem to think I'm hilarious.

Im pretty funny, I do it from time to time, but unfortunately in this day and age you have to be famous to book gigs. Need TV credits, or lots of followers and stuff. I know one comic had a video go viral and used that fame to leverage shows across the country.

youtube.com/watch?v=MCFgja50dos

Ayy i do the same.

At least when we bomb we'll do it properly.

wow you guys write ideas in text files what is this the future

copyrighted please do not steal this routine

Once when I was 13, it was at a family wedding reception mostly one liners like you know what they say about men with big feetbig socks you duffers as any one would expect I was heckled by a drunk uncle who used to write jokes for rove ( an Australian comedy talk show)

Don't Australians kill hecklers by custom?

He was spared of his life exclusively by their blood bond.

Not stand up, but I improved a comedy skit.
Got a lot of laughs and made me realize I want to be an actor.

Also sold a futerma joke to my brothers mate who was a semi successful comic for $10 it was a can I get your autograph sign it out to eBay

I'm getting sick of being made fun of, josh

People can be funny, but not have good delivery.

You can work on that, though. And if the delivery never pans out, then can become a writer (assuming actually funny)

>Starting off with a racist joke
wew lad

would you?

Sadly by custom I couldn't spill bloody with out compensating the bride and I left my citizenships right to indigenous land at home that day

you guys ever notice how asian food tastes better after you nuke it? the people are the same way!

I do an hour long show Monday-Friday

Keep in mind, you'll likely not be as bad as this guy.

youtube.com/watch?v=xqX0Z4NeT9o

what mic in SF?

I think I can be pretty funny. I used to act a lot, and I think I can deliver a line in a way that lands. Not 100% of the time, but nobody can land every joke. I think I could do some funny material, but it's hard to judge yourself. I'm scared I'll be like A-Log and go up and do a bit that's only funny in my spergy head.

youtube.com/watch?v=B7_C6G194nE

It was great until everyone realized that we were actually genuinely trying to play music and they all left.

>Writer for Rove heckling anyone

I always thought that if I did stand up high on pot that I would kill. And I have always been grateful that I never followed up on that.

I have the satisfaction of knowimg his alcoholism destroyed he's marriage to a well of lady and now the turkey delivers meals to the elderly as his only form of income.

I did fairly regularly for about six months. They used to have a free open mic/comedy workshop once a week, with the idea that you'd do your set and then get criticism and feedback afterward. I never got any kind of feedback at all. So either I was the single greatest comedian to step onto a stage because everything I did came out perfect and required no workshopping, or I was so bland and forgettable that nobody could bother to come up with anything to say. I stopped going after a while; it's been about two years since I've done it.

However, I thought did really well once. The mic was happening before the bar had their karaoke night, and since I was a new guy and didn't know any of the local comics, I had to go dead last, after all the comedians had all fucked off and gone home. Luckily, though, the bar was full of regular "civilians" (?) who were waiting for karaoke and already had a few drinks in them, so they were much nicer than a room full of comics who refuse to laugh at anyone on stage.

Brainwash

Would have guessed, that's a good mic, people get boo'd but usually comics have the balls to stand up for their jokes and not walk off. Was tony hosting?

Shit nigger, he didn't molest you or anything he just tossed some bants your way at a wedding when you were pretty much only surrounded by family anyway.

100% didn't fase me I just find other peoples suffering funny to a degree

yea I did a stand up on cheese and gagged on stage

Tony's a good guy. I'm writing a joke about this thread right now btw, it includes my feelings about you implying that I'm ball-less.

Cool, Im Oliver Graves, Ive actually done stand up more than once unlike you're cowardly ass who quit after one go of it.

Nice makeup. Did it come with AIDS, or did you have to get that on your own?

Of course, and i fucking hate her.

ur shit senpai
youtube.com/watch?v=pOgOJpeTjbc

I got up on stage and started screaming about my vagina and shoes! LOL! I slayed them.

HAHAHAHA

You're a funny guy

will be doing it this summer
any advice?

I did try once. All i know were racists jokes. I got booed off stage 7 minutes in. word spread around campus that i was racist, i even got suckered punch twice on separate occasions because of this

What the...?

Listen man, I plan to do it again, that's why I'm scribing jokes right now as I solve captchas, but I don't want antifa throwing molotovs at me while I'm just trying to express my unique views and entertain. So I might have something to say about certain religions being a little more violent than the others, is that really a reason to shout so loud and constantly during my set that I cannot do anything except leave? Is that really a reason I should receive death threats even though no one in the audience should have known my real name, mailing address, or email address, or facebook or instagram?

Tony is cool as fuck but I don't know what kind of jokes you're telling where you aren't getting pelted by Tide bottles before you quit and never come back.

two years later you're still shit desu
youtube.com/watch?v=WleJL8it8m4

Be funny.

Almost every time you do an open mic where the crowd is nothing but other comics, you're going to eat a big bowl of shit. That's normal. Comedians are assholes. They don't want to laugh at anyone else in the room; they want to be "the funny one."

Learn to read the room. You'll eventually start to notice trends. Comedians (at least in my city), for example, hate "jokey" jokes. They don't like set-up/punchline one-liners.

All the people ITT who claim they are funny, why have I not laughed at a single fucking word you have typed? You have a captive audience in Sup Forums and you can't even type a half decent story about your misadventures into the world of comedy? Every single one of you is a talentless hack and I award you no (you)'s. good day to you sirs.

3 years later you're still pretty bad tbqh famalam
youtube.com/watch?v=exYWd3vRsvA

Because they're all full of shit.
Stand up comedy isn't even funny.
Memes are the only thing that make me laugh.

Each (You) is a laugh. is currently the funniest person in the thread. You're now up there, too!

>Memes

You're a terrible person.

Cool, sucks Im not for you, but Ive been on funnyordie and won comedy competitions, lets see vids of your sets.

OK, now I don't believe you. All this happened based on performing once at brainwash? These things cant be connected.

>funnyordie
really made it big lad. very impressive.

Compared your streak of success on Sup Forums, fuck yea.

You would have to be almost cartoonishly homosexual to turn this down.

I wonder how a stand-up routine would look like on each board?

>Sup Forums
So, niggers right? and (((them)))? white genocide, islam is bad. fuck SJWs. ">x" ">white". Thanks you've all been great, heil hitler!

>Sup Forums
*word for word rendition of bane plane scene that receives a standing ovation*

>/r9k/
how's it going guys, do we have any non-virgins in the house tonight? Ah, yeah you in the back, GET OUT THE FUCK OUT NOW

Meh.

You aren't funny. Stop trying please

>hash tag pepsi
>*huge laugh*

Normies are this easily amused? Fuck i could be a comic

>cartoonishly homosexual

I like that, I'm stealing it

Take that back. NOW.

>/r9k/
*comic begins crying and reads from an elaborate manifesto blaming women for all of his woes before opening fire on the crowd with an AR-15*

>Sup Forums
*Comic displays large photograph of James Harden, crowd laughs uproariously for hours*

>I always thought that if I did stand up high on pot that I would kill.
DO NOT fucking do this.
My asshole friends smoked me up knowing I would bomb. Instead ask for a shot or maybe two of booze to get lose. Don't smoke pot unless you're just there to watch.

now this is funny and topical user. do more

>Sup Forums
Does a lot of nerd humor, does endless routines on how good BvS was

>/adv/
Is a woman, isn't funny

>/toy/
Prop comic, still funnier than the woman

>Sup Forums
*invalid shits its diaper and throws into the crowd as a souvenir*

Sup Forums


>says random thing


Sup Forums


>talk about game


/lit/


mention book

Have some dignity.

>/cgl/
see Amy Schumer special

Stand up sucks. All open mic is bad and most touring comics are mediocre. Every set up and joke you can think of has been done a million times before. Only go into comedy if you have some autistic affliction that gives you a brilliant mind.

>don't try anything! EVER! just sit in your mom's basement letting life pass you by like I did. A REAL man.

Oh, so he had no regrets when he died? Don't even know why we're having this thread, then.

Continue sucking cocks.

If you don't regret anything, you've wasted your life.

i have a weak spot for jewess

Uh disregard my post, please. I thought I was replying to the Philip Seymour Hoffman thread.

youtube.com/watch?v=5xsaMcw69D8

baka

Don't do political/racial humour unless you know your crowd.
Say some leftist went up and joked about killing straight white cis men at a trump rally, obviously would be booed.
That's how normal people feel when you make jokes about "certain people".

Whoa whoa ease up there, tiger, I already explained myself, no need to go global thermonuclear war on me!

>I was 19 at the time and that's the oldest I've ever been at that point of time in my life

Without hesitation

i'd make white babies with her for sure

>jew
>white