Hello, Sir! Alone again this week? I have your fresh batch of popped corned right here. Careful, it's hot!

Hello, Sir! Alone again this week? I have your fresh batch of popped corned right here. Careful, it's hot!

Careful with the lip there Robert

You've insulted me for the last time Robert

I love you Robert, the other day some cracker was behind the counter, DON'T LEAVE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE ROBERT YOU'LL ALL I HAVE!!!! LEAVE AND I'LL TIE THE NOOSE I SWEAR!!! aaaa hahahah *cries*

Why don't you hook me up with one of your white bitches with a fat ass?

Joke's on you, Robert. My date is already inside waiting for me!

> he had it ready for me
I don't deserve you

hi robert, yeah no one wanted to see Born in China with me. yeah, again. thank you, do you think you can ask the ushers to kinda chill again this week? maybe i can make a friend in the theater talking about the animals. i won't be too loud or anything, i promise. yeah that's fine i understand. thanks. enjoy the mov- fuck.

ROBERT GET DOWN

>Careful, it's hot!
y-you too.

...

>theatre patron
but HWHYYY

Oh, hello sir, I was just visiting with your daughter. She really liked the popcorn.

that would be so embarrassing REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I didn't know you a trained masseur Robert!

Thanks helping her relax, she has a big date with Chad tonight!

...

WHAT A BRO, POPCORN IS ON HIM TONIGHT IM SURE.

Oh carry on then.

>heading out to the cinema
>mom stops me and asks me to bring my little brother
>he suffers from severe down's syndrome and is only my half brother
>reluctantly ask if he would want to accompany me to the theatre
>"oh yeah bro i'm ALWAYS DOWN" while giving a thumbs up
>he says this in response to almost anything for the last 6 years because it made us all laugh once before
>not sure if he even realizes why we found it funny that one time
>whatever
>arrive at the cinema and it's the penis inspection opening ceremony
>of all fucking days
>ringmaster challenges the crowd for someone to step forward for initial inspection which is performed publically on stage for everyone to see
>before i can stop him my little brother shouts his catch phrase
>hooded druids appear behind us and drag him to the stage
>the crowd chants for him to reveal his dirty little retard dick
>he has no idea what to do and shows everyone his asshole instead
>ringmaster begins whipping him and demanding he take out his dick
>brother is confused and upset now and starts spreading his cheeks even harder, hands shaking from straining so hard
>more whipping
>crowd begins to throw consessions in a riot
>the whole theatre is in disarray
>someone opened the falcon cages and bird shit is landing everywhere
>security grabs my arm and asks if i'm that retard's handler
>get thrown in the barracks for three months with my brother who's newest bad habit is spreading his ass cheeks as hard as he can when you ask him a question
>miss his old catchphrase

i still haven't seen suicide squad

w-which way to the bathroom?
>I'm sorry, sir. Could you repeat that question again for me?
way to the b-bathroom..
>One for time for me a little louder, sir. I beg your pardon.
um.. never mind.. sorry

Robert, are you aware that young lady is currently in a state of undress? I trust you will do the honorable thing and help her find her clothes post haste. Good day, Robert!

Find a single flaw with Robert

He doesn't actually work at my local kinoplex

But I only got a boy...

>someone opened the falcon cages and bird shit is landing everywhere

this isn't canon, frig off

>Sir, Jules has informed me that you have refused to consent to the mid-film penis inspection, is this true? Please note that these tests are MANDATORY and you will not be readmitted into the theater until you cooperate.

Careful, she's hot.

moot?

You've always been good to me black employee that hands me free popcorn who I never did get the name of. I will always remember you in my heart and possibly my penis.

woah this is a rare robet

>ringmaster

I lost it.

I love Robert threads. I wish they were faster tho

...

>would you like to upgrade to an extra large Guardians of the Galaxy cup, your son would definitely love it!

Wait, is this the guy who's in those theatre PSAs before movies or something?
I don't lurk Sup Forums enough to know this meme.

You can become my son when you're ready,Robert.I know having Dad sounds exciting but please make you're for the commitment of marriage

test

Robert?

you don't get to bring crab legs

yep