Looks like pork is back on the menu boys

pagesix.com/2017/05/16/amy-schumer-splits-with-boyfriend-ben-hanisch/

Good for him!

I'm glad he came to his senses

How do adults break up in real life?

Is this the end of Amy Schumer?

Which actresses would you marry for their money?
My answer: all of 'em

Thank God. Now she tell a bunch of new stories..... I mean, jokes, about fucking a bunch of random dudes and awkward drunken one night stands.

If she had only kept that mangled tit out of the movie it would have topped $200 million by now.

fingers crossed

i dont even hate her i dont even know her that well and ive never seen anything shes in but she looks like a cunt

How the fuck did this movie make 20 million dollars in its first week and who gave Amy Myvaginasmelly a 40million budget movie

Slowly become disappointed with each other until someone has the balls to pull the trigger. By this point, the woman usually already has the next guy in mind.

>comedy about 2 annoying bitches
>goldie hawn is the pretty one
>$42 million budget
how the fuck did this get greenlit?

>pork
I'm Muslim, so naturally I want to explode inside her.

DUDE
VAGINA JOKES
LMAO

wtf? i hate smellyvaginas now

desu with how retarded audiences are nowadays surprised to only made that much

>King Arthur Falls on his Sword

Man, she has aged A LOT, even by white girl standards. I think she's still pretty, but man, she had such youthful beauty in her early 20s.

>even by white girl standards
Dumb meme.

he was just keeping her warm for round seven with jeselnik anyway

>How the fuck did this movie make 20 million dollars in its first week
mothers' day weekend

Nice title, OP

Imagine being Goldie Hawn, all damn I a famous actress who got her start on a comedy tv show and I was hot as fuck. And you have to look schumer, with her fat pork ass, in the face and treat her as some sort of equal. This flavor of the month shit who is famous for "breaking beauty standards" aka eating cheetos and chugging coke, and you have to act like she is some sort of equal to you when no one will remember her 5 years from now.

Man, jews sure do love ghosting cash to their friends. $42mil for a fucking character comedy is insane.

Can you imagine all those disappointed mothers in the audience?

wait what

Its not her fault.

Its those damn alt-right-wing Redditors again!

>Can you imagine all those disappointed mothers in the audience?

mums typically have shite for taste in my experience

I really hate this meme. I'm not even white, and white girls age the best, by far.

Most latinas get fat. Most blacks and Asians (both the yellow and brown ones) look like trannies past the age of ~30. A lot of the brown Asians and blacks also just explode in terms of weight. This is especially bad problematic for the blacks, as there are generally very few attractive black girls to begin with.

The yellow asians sill have a bit of prettiness, but there's an unshakable feeling that they have a cock hidden somewhere, and I know I can't be the only one that feels this way. If you don't have a fear of a hidden penis, then yeah, I guess the yellow Asians would age well. Blacks, absolutely not.

Sure, there are a handful of exceptions, but white women (in the broadest sense) will generally age the best, bearing in mind my thoughts on the yellow Asians.

most autistic post i've ever read

Many sources say that looking back, he rates the relationship 1 out of 5 stars.

you must be the newest person on Sup Forums

Time to pork some pork

Lol no, go back to Sup Forums

Found the minorities.

White people age best? Where did you get that from?

You probably haven't. Most minorities would have agreed with my post, since it is all fact (except maybe my irrational fear of hidden yellow penis). It tends to be the nu males who buy into this meme of black girls being attractive. Literally every black person I have ever spoken to about this agrees that white girls are more attractive. If someone genuinely finds black girls to be more attractive, or feels that they generally age well, then they have a weird sexual fetish not practiced by the majority of the population. Its like a form of being gay I suppose.

Going outside.