Take me to your leader!

>Take me to your leader!
what do?

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>MOOOOOOOM

Bullshit movie.

>you found us and will grant you one wish, but we will fucking kill you for no good reason

I am the leader. I declare war.

We will fight to the death.


Then lie back as degeneracy is destroyed

call moot ;_;

PART time

Stick their head in the toilet and flush it

They were killin' commies like good redblooded Americans, bro.

Take it to the nearest synagogue

If I anwser seriously then obviously you call the police who will then forward it up to the relevant authorities.

But an alien civilization with the technological know how to get here would not be so retarded as to show themselves to the first random dumbshit human they meet. They would probably study us first before deciding to make contact.

fpbp

tell them I'm Canadian and hope for a quick death

Dumbass Alien no one rules me except myself

take them to Charles Barkley so I can hear him say, "what iz dis, dis iz juss radickuhluss" just before they murder our entire species.

>He mad a quick trip to Mars

>take me to your leader
>takes him to recep tayyip erdogan

Lead it to my basement.

Racks a shotgun shell, fuck off to the moon ya space niggers.

I am that leader.

My authority above all human's matters the most.

Here are the targets you should exterminate.

>what do?
Take em to the Sheriff.

fpbp

Ask it for its preferred pronouns

>Know English
>Does not know who Obongo is
Dumb Martian, I have no leader but myself my property.

Bend them over and do them in the ayypussy. Make weird hybrid race.

Try to fuck it. Suck his nipples

>implying he doesn't have trumps cell phone number

DUDE AYY LMAO

>Try looking around 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue up in Washington D.C., for the tall black guy. Big ears. Can't miss him.

Sup Forums has desensitized me to a point where if I were to really meet an extraterrestrial life form, the first thing I'd say after shitting my pants and pissing is

"ayy lmao"

>Tell them Obama is the President, show them picture
>"Seriously though...take us to your leader."

Grab one of those fuckers and torture/rape it until they come exterminatus earth

>take me to your dealer
10/10

...

>>Take me to your leader

Guys, what if when aliens land "ayy lmao" becomes a slur?

direct them to israel

AYO HOL UP

Trump

I take them to my altar of KEK.

>looks left
>looks right
>let me tell you about the jews

those arent aliens. they are future gooks. grays and all variants are just future gooks. big eyes small chin . they tried to make animu real but the slanted eyes couldnt be phased out and their heads got big when they colonized marz and traveling through time you need to take into account the movement of planets and the solar system so you have to do it in a space ship

so ima demand a copy of TES7-9 and season 2 of one punch man

you're not alone

I wonder, what would aliens think upon seeing earth? Considering that they're more advanced than us to even get here, they must also be smarter.

How would they react to seeing all the propaganda and globalist trickery? I'd imagine it being somewhere along the lines of

>holy shit xetkl, look at this planet
>oh wow kpork, that's fucked
>yeah lets just get the fuck out of here

....!!! So much motherfucking win!!!! lol

I am the leader, how ever the people are currently in revolt against me
I would greatly appreciate any assistance in putting them in their place.

t. one of those bums in Warband that keep crashing in lord's halls

Surprised nobody said this; I'd show them Sup Forums.

Show them this picture

Honestly this

It would probably be considered some kind of greeting to them as well

Are Japs the shitposting KANGZ now?

Step aside Aus

"Go home space niggers, we're full!"

Take out knife and kill.

take them to my leader
hopfully they kill obongo
trump negotiates killer deal, get some of their tech, reverse engineer it, build our army, wreck alien's shit.
trump declares himself emperor of new interplanetary army, all supporters leave earth to fester with the liberal degeneracy.
come back in 10 years to see how the muslim world is doing

w-whats warband?
i dont even..

Mount&Blade: Warband

>For each of the factions, there is a claimant who believes that he or she has been wronged and should rightfully be in charge. They can be found randomly throughout the map, trying to raise support for their cause. The claimants will never be found within the borders of the faction for which they are the claimant, and are only found in the keeps of other kingdoms. Talking to a traveller and paying 30 denars will give you the location of any claimant.

>he doesn't know Warband

Do what they want. Provide them with information to the best of my ability. Hope I either get immortality or a trip off this rock for my assistance.

Fresh off the boat, from reddit, kid? heh I remember when I was just like you. Braindead. Lemme give you a tip so you can make it in this cyber sanctuary: never make jokes like that. You got no reputation here, you got no name, you got jackshit here. It's survival of the fittest and you ain't gonna survive long on Sup Forums by saying stupid jokes that your little hugbox cuntsucking reddit friends would upboat. None of that here. You don't upboat. You don't downboat. This ain't reddit, kid. This is Sup Forums. We have REAL intellectual discussion, something I don't think you're all that familiar with. You don't like it, you can hit the bricks on over to imgur, you daily show watching son of a bitch. I hope you don't tho. I hope you stay here and learn our ways. Things are different here, unlike any other place that the light of internet pop culture reaches. You can be anything here. Me ? heh, I'm a judge.. this place.... this place has a lot to offer... heh you'll see, kid . . . that is if you can handle it.

new pasta?
it's gay

why did they use that take?? you know... the worst one

youtube.com/watch?v=Tn5ywPFetAY

no user! not our secret bubble blowing technique!

Fresh off the boat, from reddit, kid? heh I remember when I was just like you. Braindead. Lemme give you a tip so you can make it in this cyber sanctuary: never make jokes like that. You got no reputation here, you got no name, you got jackshit here. It's survival of the fittest and you ain't gonna survive long on Sup Forums by saying stupid jokes that your little hugbox cuntsucking reddit friends would upboat. None of that here. You don't upboat. You don't downboat. This ain't reddit, kid. This is Sup Forums. We have REAL intellectual discussion, something I don't think you're all that familiar with. You don't like it, you can hit the bricks on over to imgur, you daily show watching son of a bitch. I hope you don't tho. I hope you stay here and learn our ways. Things are different here, unlike any other place that the light of internet pop culture reaches. You can be anything here. Me ? heh, I'm a judge.. this place.... this place has a lot to offer... heh you'll see, kid . . . that is if you can handle it.

Immediately try to find a hole suitable enough for my dick.

They gave her what she wanted. She just couldn't process it and it literally fried her brain.

What did she want?

>WHOA DUDE YOU GUYS KNOW ABOUT KEK?

Determine their political views and then decide.
>if Liberal, kill
>if Conservative, show videos of Adolf Hitler and ask them to model their crafts after the Nazis, then commit the next holocaust

>a wild rabbit comes up to me begging for some of the carrots I'm carrying
>I force the rabbit to eat itself to death
>"I just gave the rabbit what it wanted"

Did any aliens ever say that, really? I think it is just a meme.

maybe greet them with a heil salute too, why not

this

but you will double take 3 times you cant deny that

Unzip, here put this communication device in your mouth.

Raep.

First I have no leader.
Second even if he meant about the human race in general, we also don't have an unified leader
Third, if an alien tries to talk to a simpleton like me instead of studying our race for years without being seen, he wouldn't be doing it for the information he asked, it would surely be a test of my behaviors.

All in all if aliens ever come to earth they'd probably end up knowing a lot more about us than we do.

I was thinking something pretty much along the same lines.

Although instead of asking for their help restoring me to power, I'd just leverage my position as that-guy-who's-friends-with-the-aliens into a sort of quasi-world leader position.

After all, if I tell people that the aliens have appointed me to oversee their contact with humans and that if people want some sweet alien technology they'd better do as I say, it's not like anyone is going to challenge that. The aliens will believe they're dealing with earth's leader, and the humans will believe they're dealing with the aliens' ambassador, and as long as no one catches on both of those will for all intents and purposes be the truth. I'll tell the aliens that it's a huge taboo for outsiders to speak to anyone but the leader, and I'll tell the humans that the aliens only trust me and will incinerate anyone else who tries to talk to them. Hopefully by the time anyone gets suspicious I'll be too entrenched in my position to be removed.

She wanted to know everything as far as I remember. Then her head 'sploded

>"Just goto 725 5th Ave, New York, NY 10022, United States, alien friends. Our leader will be waiting there to greet you."

"YES!"

it's more like giving a dog chocolate, really.

>ayy lmao
>not ayo lmao
One job.

Since this is an Alien thread im going to shill for the Political Alien Youniverus. Him and Unicom have taken interest in earth

youtu.be/8bSyVY2oBas

youtu.be/GnYCOFfdb7s

first non-omitted reply best reply!!!

What movie is this?

Filthy Xeno's!!!!

Assuming they understand English and not some gibberish I can't understand. Tell them the world has no official leader but our country's leaders are in DC. Then like a good host I'd ask if they would like some water or some of our food while they put in coordinates or some other shit

>Take me to your leader!

Point them to the direction of Israel

drop my pants and try to fuck it.

*unzips pants
"my cock is my leader

>Theoretically, I'm the leader
Hope they buy it and take me on a cool space adventure with space negotiations. Theoretically I can't prove anyone else exists but me.

Who?

If you fuckers managed to get here from another galaxy, you could have landed at the fuckin parliament or some shit like that.

>He doesn't put the claimants on the throne to weaken the kingdom
>He doesn't exploit this to get other leaders to declare war on them
>He doesn't use the wars to make a profit
>He doesn't swoop in when all sides are at their weakest and crush any resistance
Strategy tier: pleb

No, it's like force feeding a dog so much food that it dies. It's not like they gave her a single haiku and she died of alien memes poisoning.

Fuck that, they suck.
Make me the new leader. :)

>ayys lands in the PH
>take me to your leader
>brings them to the slums
>try to rob them
>ayys declare war on earth
Please don't land here.

...

>alien memes poisoning.
Did she see Baneposting before it existed?

...

Therefore the correct answer is to kill them.