How is it possible to not have a single flaw? How can something be literal perfection right down to the smallest detail

How is it possible to not have a single flaw? How can something be literal perfection right down to the smallest detail

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the lack of diversity is extremely problematic

Sam was a little too gay for Frodo

because you're autistic

Why do plebs love these movies so much?

I mean they're fine but I don't understand.

too white, if remade today, Morgan Freeman would be Gandalf and Idris Elba would be Aragorn

LONDON

...

>tfw this movie exists and is immortalized and there is nothing they can do to change it

Until patching a DVD becomes a thing

Return of the King - Extended Edition
>Merry and Pippin stoned as fuck at Isengard
>Gandalf and Co. meet up with them
Pippin: "We are sitting on a field of victory-"
>'sitting' intentionally pronounced 'shitting'

I'm still cringing over that

The dogshit Gollum CGI and complete lack of a final third let it down.

>patch notes
>v1.09
>fixed problem with too many white fucking males
>Gandalf is now georginalf a transexual sorceress
>Sam and Frodo now share a kiss on the eagle ride back over the fires of mt doom

'Pipe weed' is tobacco, not cannabis
And he has a pipe in his mouth when he says that so of course it sounds different

roastie

>elves
>men
>wizards
>hobbits
>dwarfs
>orcs
Seems pretty diverse if you ask me.

>Sam was a little too gay for Frodo

but that was actually true to the books

when Gimli tries to destoy the one ring with his axe in Fellowship

youtube.com/watch?v=sUrJdsN_-B0

How about Frodo fake dying every 20 minutes?

Why didn't they just build more rings?

fucking Hackson. that cave troll in Moria was the first symptom of the cancer that would metastacize and kill his later films.

It's not only the movies, it's the universe

It's a good adaptation but the books are still better
Specially considering the books are not that great to begin with

No, seriously, why didn't they just fly the ring to Mordor? You always get these "Sauron had air defense" but I just watched Return of the King last night and the Eagles fuck the Nazgul up, shit that 1 dainty woman 2chops the Nazgul's head off.

So great

Short answer: it would be a shit story

Tolkien can't write
Good worldbuilding though

>things plebs say

I know. I just explained it to you, my imperator.

>thinks Jackson didn't suggest in six films that people got high off Middle-Earth 'tobacco'

First movie was perfect

Second and especially third had too much action and dumb cheesy dialogue between gimli and Legolas, bad cgi too in some scenes

Eagles are sentient and susceptible to the ring.

>cheesy dialogue
That was banter mate, I'm guessing you're American

I know right. All movies need as many niggers as possible.

Nope. Guessing you're Aussie or British if you were stupid enough to enjoy that kiddie shit?

they could have just taken a boat to gondor

kek

>Tolkien can't write
Have you read LOTR? He's a fantastic writer

It's the single greatest fantasy film of all time. Probably won't be beat in our lifetime.

>eagles would've been corrupted by the power of the ring
>the nazgul

"why didn't they just use the eagles" Is reddit

Even the first suffered from flat characters and boring motivations.

The other two were "decent" at best.

>uses his worst work as example
Isn't this an 18+ board?

It's not like the eagles could even wear the fucking ring. Nor was it stated anywhere in the movie.

MINAS ANOR

No /teevee/ is actually 15 and up

>Dwarves are expert miners
>Dwarves built Moria, a huge fucking complex of caves

Why not dig a tunnel to Mt. Doom?

They were channeling the collective racial unconscious soul of the white european race whilst producing this kino, that's why it's so awesome and GOAT

the whole reason they got the ring into Mordor at all is because Sauron wasn't expecting it, he thought they were taking it to Gondor to use against him. If they hopped on the eagles Sauron would have bugged out and locked up Mt Doom and they would have been fucked. What would they do when they got there? Fight the entire orc army and Nazguls with a dozen eagles and the fellowship?

>literal perfection
oh sweetie no...

zero representation of minority, LGBTTQQIAAP+ and marginalised humans. advocates the segregation of races. portrays people of color in a negetive and hateful depiction

we have enough people legitimately acting like this in real life, can you fuck off with the roleplay?

Please no.

ANSWER ME TOLKIEN

You don't have to wear it to be corrupted by it

I hope this is bait

The effect would be still much slower, they could change eagles on the way to Mordor like Harry, Ron and Hermione did with the medallion. Hell, what the fuck would a corrupted eagle even do? They had no wear to even "take" the ring since it's too small. Swallow it?

Besides again, it was never stated in the movie how exactly it works.

>The effect would be still much slower
No it wouldn't

unless it is black, it isn't diverse, so take your problematic views and get the fuck out you shit lord.

Frodo clearly had an easier time dealing with the ring when he didn't wear it.

>Frodo didn't look strong-willed as in Bakshi's movie
>The Nazgul didn't look scary in wraith form.
>Arwen. All of it. IT WAS FUCKING GLORFINDEL NOT THAT ELVEN CHICK.
Rest is good. First one is the best, the other 2 have a bit too much CGI

What about their tax policy?

>literally called weed
>makes them jolly
>pretty fucking obviously weed if you read the books
what

>>pretty fucking obviously weed if you read the books
Confirmed for having never read the books

They were smoking weed from the Dunlanders, I recall.

>There is another astonishing thing about Hobbits of old that must be mentioned, an astonishing habit: they imbibed or inhaled, through pipes of clay or wood, the smoke of the burning leaves of a herb, which they called pipe-weed or leaf, a variety probably of Nicotiana.
>Nicotiana
It's tobacco.

Legolas adds nothing to the story other than stating the obvious, and that doesn't help when Orlando Bloom can't act.

Him and Liv Tyler were the only bad casting choices.

>Legolas adds nothing to the story other than stating the obvious

but it wasn't obvious that THEY'RE TAKING THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARDGARDGARD. they could have been taking them to Mordor or even back to Moria.

>tfw i unironically want a LOTR remake

Hobbits are a race that aren't effected by the ring that much, that's why bilbo had it for so long without bad effects

There are many flaws. For example, Legolas surfing the stairs with his shield. Or the blue filter they added to the BDs.

Even when you know it would be far worse?

This is one of the few instances where I love the book more than the films but the films are in my top films ever.

These are not Fellowship issues.

>Gandalf told in Fellowship he's smoking it so much it's affecting his perception

gimli was a stupid nigger in those films. in the books he was epic and powerful.

Why didn't the eagles just-

...

#NotAllOrcs

>ease and level of corruption is directly equal to how powerful you are
>hobbits are fucking nothing specks
>galadriel goes insane for just a second and she's a holder of another ring of fucking power
>boromir clearly influenced several times
>eagles are literally proud demigods doing a favour for what amounts to a literal angel, Gandalf

It's spelled out for you. No one but Hobbits should be near this thing.