/calvin/

Calvin general. Other monsters may also be discussed ITT, but only so long as they are actually scary. Frankenstein's monster discussion is not welcome ITT.

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Was it malicious intent or survival instinct?

survival instinct

That's what I thought too

He was the ill intent.

so how exactly is that tiny plant like fucker scary?

I could've sworn that the only reason it went on a killing spree was because it was hurt by the atmospheric accident in the lab?!

Nothing ever hurt it. It only started be truly aggressive when it grew enough to attack effectively

What's it called when you swat a mosquito?
Calvin's violence was only ever either accidental or retributive.

>What's it called when you swat a mosquito?
A waste of taxpayer dollars.

>nothing ever hurt it
near the beginning of the film the doctor guy left it alone and some sort of pressure malfunction thing happened in the lab that made it go dormant for a while. Also the guy kept shocking it with an electric shock tool

I thought so too but they say in the movie that Calvin likely rekt the entire Mars before , so it's just how it rolls

Name of movie? Is it just called Calvin?

and Hobbes.

I considered watching Life, but everything I see about it makes me think it's not worth bothering with.

...

What's the difference?

Weren't there any fucking knives on that station? They could have shanked it a million times when it got close to attack.

And you guys laughed at the axe in Prometheus.

This is why the ending isn't upsetting. Calv just isn't a threat on Earth. We have plenty of knives around. The fishermen who unleashed him probably had 5 or 6 wakizashis on their persons.

There's no difference. That's the point of the film.

He grows and every cell is every type or cell so its basically a brain muscle that can snap your bones and such. It also grows damn fast!

It could always land in the UK.

fucking niggers

maybe you missed the part where they said that every cell of this organism is independent, you can't really kill it unless you destroy all of them

fucking nigger

You missed the part where it can't survive on earth.

heh

why wouldn't it survive on earth ?

right-wing politics

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>but only so long as they are actually scary
Does that mean calvin doesn't count? He was kind of scary until after he killed reynolds. Then he was just a boring butterfly.

But the UK is knife central.

It's not, it's a huge fucking disappointment. Laughably bad science, fairly shitty character writing, and the most boring fucking "menacing alien" ever.

And the LE TWIST is as generic as it gets.

Calvin only seems dangerous because It's octopus tentacle monster design its hundreds of times more dangerous than a human body in space.

once it gets on land, hell even water he becomes vulnerable to physics humans are much better suited for. All you'd need is a shotgun to subdue the thing, We're also in the day and age of practical military grade laser weaponry. Nothing survives the a beam of death hotter than the sun.

>Nothing survives the a beam of death hotter than the sun
Calvin would. Also he's right behind you

Why it never splits?

Forgive my ignorance. Is this a show called Calvin?

I don't know what kind of fantasy world you're living in but here on earth we don't have laser guns which can shoot beams that instantly heat things to millions of degrees.

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Is the show called Calvin or not, faggot?

Thank you, I for one wished they kept him that size (pic) because while he is not menacing looking his ability to fucking go into any nook and cranny would have made the film more suspenseful instead he became generic tentacle evil thing.

>dude it's only as smart as the script needs to be lmao
It's an alright movie while you're watching it but thinking too hard about it later isn't a good idea.

he / it was agitated by electric shock, he isn't invulnerable
(ill admit i looked behind me)

hope you're joking or like 90 years old

>thinking too hard
Thinking at all more like.
Literally everything goes wrong and there are no redundancies.
These are possibly the most retarded "smart" people I have ever witnessed.

Uhh, Calvin won. The non-Calvins were the ones who were only as smart as the script needed them to be.

The corona is above a million degrees. Get educated.

Yep, I hate that directors need to make people so stupid to advance the plot. There is so many ways the film could have done things but chose the deep fucking way cause shit I don't know.

What? I'm talking about how Calvin can disrupt complex machinery deliberately (a voice over makes this clear) but can't figure out how to open a hatch with his super strength.

I meant derp way. I guess the deep way of it means fucking your brains out on how stupid the film went.

Don't reply to tripfags.

Don't derail threads.

Well, poking a hole and twisting off a cap is way easier than making the connection that if you pull this level the door will open. But yeah, during the spacewalk attack when the captain woman's coolant is fucked, there's a very specific voice over from the black scientist man saying "It knows what it's doing".

I thought maybe the movie was going to go with something like it learns information from people it kills but nope it's just another inconsistent movie monster. Fuck Calvin and fuck black scientists.

Yes yes you're the same guy from last night. It's still stupid.

I hated that there were MULTIPLE "oops we did X but now we don't have enough fuel left for Y" crises.

Because doesn't every astronaut worry about fuel efficiency and remaining delta-v like, every fucking minute they're doing their job?

It'd be like a deep sea diver suddenly going "holy shit I'm surrounded by water"

The movie was okay to watch, but in retrospect Calvin is one of the least interesting movie monsters I've ever seen.

>Every cell is eyes muscle and brain so he's perfect at all those things!
>When he's mouse-sized, he's stronger than an adult human man and can break his whole hand!
>He runs from fire, except he's invulnerable to fire.
>Can survive, operate, and kill in vacuum, effectively indefinitely
>Knows the layout of the station's innards perfectly so he can kill anytime
>No weaknesses LOL

how could NASA hire such stupid astronauts?
>yfw diversity hire
>yfw the black guy is the real villain

>he still thinks a million degrees is hot
Modern day lasers easily heat things to 5 million degrees+

It's more like a deep sea diver encountering the most frightening thing they had ever encountered, unexpectedly, and using their oxygen backpacks (or whatever those things are called) to spray oxygen in the terror's face or to jet away then being low on oxygen because they're oxygen backpacks were depleted.

Yes, now show me a functioning laser weapon employed by any military which does that job on a portable scale and we will be back on track with the premise you proposed.

You son of a birch, now some Hollywood asshole is going to make the deep sea diver with split personality movie. Starring Jen Lawrence and voice over of Will Smith the second personality with a fear of water.

Big dumb CGI barnacle. I couldn't get into this movie because of how fake CGI looks.

>I hated that there were MULTIPLE "oops we did X but now we don't have enough fuel left for Y" crises.
they wanted to make a balance of sci-fi and horror but they had to sacrifice the sci-fi.

Take away the living in space for to long and the way too smart aspect and he would have been perfect in my opinion.

The CGI was fine for the monster in my opinion.

You forgot
>Every cell is eyes muscle and brain
>still makes himself a head and face for some pointless reason and moves around as if he has one front part and one back part even though he's started out as a starfish
Would've been scarier if he was an alien comb jelly to be honest.

It became kind of off when he grew bigger in size.

dislikes: Lincoln park, coca cola, and old movies (bleh :((( )

>so long as they are actually scary

This is not scary. It's a fucking amoeba that turns into a squid.

a 10kW laser can be mounted almost anywhere man..... your concept of a laser gun is so archaic i cant even

If the movie had turned out to be a venom prequel, would it have been kino or just a lame twist?

>kino

Fuck off, retard.

If it was then it could have played with the whole taking over a person's body thing. Which what I was hoping it was going to be but nope generic squid kid painting thing up.

Let's get real for a sec

It was better than Alien Covenant. That doesn't mean it's good, but still.

Calvin and Hobbs: The Space Wars

>now show me a functioning laser weapon

You can buy hand held lasers from China that are powerful enough to blind permanently in a millisecond and will give third degree burns in a second from meters away.

Given the jelly like structure of this thing and his reaction to a shock weapon it seems enough to keep the fucker hurt.

> laser weapon employed by any military

These are actually just getting deployed along with railguns.

> on a portable scale

It's really not far away from reality. The biggest problem is that they're just not that useful. Laser is also easily defeated by fog and smoke.

But 100kg of battery on your back and some tinkering will net you an actual laser weapon. You can do this at home with parts from China, they're not (yet) restricted. It's just that nobody bothers.

You can youtube search for people doing smaller scale versions of this and hand held tesla electricity "guns" too. Sci fi weapons are real they're just impractical garbage next to a gun.

>when Calvin managed to hide in the nigga's pant leg sucking his blood for like an hour unnoticed in spite of already being the size of an alligator

>Calvin dindu nuffin
Spotted the nigger

You still haven't provided any proof of your initial claim, friendo. Feel free to do so at any time.

It did play with that thing. Teased but did not execute.

>100% muscle mass
>100% brain matter
>100% dedication
>100% power of will

Yeah which is all well and good but it doesn't work the way that guy was implying.
>Practical millitary grade laser weaponry capable of producing a beam hotter than the sun (over a million degrees).

Is there ever a clear reason for why he didn't tell them about it?
His dialogue kind of suggests that maybe he felt sorry for the thing because it just wants to survive, but that falls apart considering it's killed two people, one of which was a close friend.

>why he didn't tell them about it?
He literally didn't know it was there. He's paraplegic - no sensation in his legs

It was literally "calvin was a good boy, dindu nuffin"
He very clearly knew from the start.

niggers always lie and seek the most destructive outcome of any situation

Tease is not playing. But just to know what part are you talking about.

No he saw it in the same room as them after they had vented the rest of the station.

How come whenever something crashes to earth from space in modern movies, it happens in that location?

>Not just slicing it up with a kitchen knife after it broke his hand

>Not venting it into space immediately when u detect malice

They could have at least established that you can't kick or punch the thing to death.

I doubt you'll accept ANYTHING I'll give you but here is it just for laughs

youtube.com/watch?v=N-SCnrmRrKg

it heats up metal so quickly the metal explodes. It can be mounted on the back of a truck, in a plane, on a boat.

just imagine what it would do to Calvin. It would be almost laughable to watch such a creature try to survive weapondry not even the Gods of old could imagine

Dude, Calvin would survive the fuck out of that weak shit. Also he's right behind you!!

That giant structure is hardly portable.
>not even the Gods of old could imagine
I guess you never heard of Archimedes' mirrors.

>you can just open the door to the containment lab with no interference on what was designed to be a firewall in case of humanity threatening life was found
>lmao were going to catch a probe hurtling at ungodly fucking speeds with an arm attached to the space station which could cause catastrophic failure and vacuum of the station if it ripped the fucking arm off
>lmao the very first samples of dirt from mars just happened to contain dormant life (which needed oxygen to survive once it was woken back up, apparently)
>lmao were just going to slam a soyez into the station and hurtle it off into space OOOPS our seals were shit lmao i guess we just risked destroying the space station and having the alien life fall into the atmosphere lmao!
>LMAO I'M USING A FLAME THROWER IN A SPACE STATION, WHICH IS ABOUT THE EQUIVALENT OF USING A FLAME THROWER IN A FUCKING SUBMARINE

>That giant structure is hardly portable
lol I knew it, whatever dude, if you actually cared instead of just being obtuse you'd of read on how it was portable as fuck in its 2014 design. And how in its current 2017 iteration, it's 5 times more powerful and even smaller


also LOL comparing lasers to reflecting the sun, sorry old man your days are over

Wew, spicy boy. You are just all kinds of upset right now.

>not just having the lab be an independent module that can be detached at the first signs shit is going fucky

Why didn't Ryan Reynolds just stick his dick in Calvin and yell POOPY COWABUNGU and wink directly into the camera and freeze time to say, "Well, I bet you're wondering how I got into this situation right now"

you're not the first or last person who has argued with me about laser guns on Sup Forums. It baffles me how many people still think of lasers as roy rogers shit. It makes me rage hard

You lost the argument and you lost hard. Go back to reading comic books, idiot.