How do we fix the X-men books?

How do we fix the X-men books?

Stop making stories about the fucking O5.

Fuck Jean, fuck Cyclops, fuck Beast fuck Iceman fuck Angel.

To fix something first we need to know the problems, list all the problems the X-Men books have.

By following the most generic super villain plan ever; we destroy them, so we can start over.

>Stop making stories about the fucking O5.
They need to be sent back, nothing less will do

Make them Inhumans instead.

the universe feels smaller than ever, the books don't have clear themes and styles

2011 wasn't a good period but it was better than the current status quo

This
Also quarantine the series
Separate it completely from the main marvel universe the whole anti-mutant thing starts to fall apart when people lose their shit over the Fantastic Four and Spiderman

But then again Marvels citizens are and have always been one parking ticket away from saying GAS ALL SUPERS
pic only tangentially related

Her legs are twice as long as the rest of her body.
and I'm definitely okay with it

Not just that retarded time displaced O5 but all versions of O5 just fuck them, the time displaced ones actually came from an alternate dimension boom now they died in an explosion, Cyclops was right but then he was wrong but then he was right and wrong boom he dies in another explosion, Iceman Beast and Angel are written in some corner and forgotten about because WHO GIVES A FUCK

>Separate it completely from the main marvel universe
Fuck off.

Get rid of the O5 I don't care how
Tell Perlmutter to fuck off, Fox has 19 years worth of Claremont to work with alone and they haven't even gone into space yet.
Give the writing duties to somebody accomplished with a vision. They just had to chase off Hickman and Remender didn't they?

Get Lemire away from team books

Three words.

Everyone
Is
Gay

Address the fact a lot of the problems are caused by the Mutants overreacting to non-Mutant moves.

Charles will never get anywhere with humanity as long as he doesn't own up to this.

He must publicly condemn the extremist mutants.

Nothing, Xmen are great

Stop telling shitty stories. Make the X-Men interact with the Marvel Universe again. Give the "Feared and hated" bit a break every few arcs and put a few more instances of Marvel Civvies not being complete gobshits all the god damned time.
Seriously, a few Stevie Hunter like characters could go a long way from making fuccbois like shut the fuck up.

Get a creative and talented writer and artist team on them, and let them go buck wild on this shit.

Everyone's been Space Phantoms since Decimation.

I'm tired of the X-Men's wishy-washyness.

Just call extremism what it is and be done with it. Save yourself a lot of trouble Charles.

Beast was fine until a few years ago

People aren't even reallt anti-mutant anymore, that's the problem
that's why they tried mixing it up with more current social issues and just generic villain shit

'sup Bendis

Let's keep their current direction and have three X-books.

First one dedicated to classic mutants who are adults. They stop complaining about politics or dumb shit like the Inhumans. They become a regular Superhero team with adventures on other countries or space or in general just save the world.
Second one dedicated to Young mutants. Classic approach for teenagers. More light book. Basically a book for teens with teen themes.
Third one for 90s edgy mutants. This one focus on all the political bullshit you want. Inhumans, Xavier dream, racism or whatever politics they wanna persecute at the time. Since these are violent edgy characters, they're more fit to be the feared mutants they always tell us exist.

Rules:

Rule 1: Don't repeat characters between books. If Iceman is on book 1, he can't be on book 2 as well. Kill the copies of every character who has it. You want gay Iceman? fine, kill the adult one and be done with it. You want cosmic Angel? keep the adult one as a separate fucking character.
Rule 2: Don't bring back the characters who left the franchise. The fucking place is already too crowded. If characters like Rogue or Kitty found new places to be, don't bring them back. It will only make it more difficult to handle so many characters between books. As a matter of fact, try to ship out more characters.
Rule 3: Stop creating fucking new characters. I don't know why anybody complains about the lack of new mutants. Fuck that. We have so many already, we have to kill them in buses. Let all the new characters be Inhumans, who gives a fuck. If you're writing an X-Book, you're focusing on characters that already exist. If you're a diva and threaten to quit or whatever then fine, create ONE. The limit is one, and it better be fucking important to the goddamn story, otherwise why the fuck are you overpopulating a franchise that is alredy small to begin with.
Rule 4: Stop making mutants fight mutants. I know hero vs hero sells lots of shit, but it doesn't have to be between mutants. People is sick to death of that. Make them fight the Inhumans, Avengers, FF, GotG, New Warriors, the Goverment, LGBT, Africa, liberals, whoever you fucking consider the good guy. But not among themselves. It's dumb that the only thing an endangered species do is fight among themselves over what their dicks say.

That way we can have some interesting X-Books while following Marvel's dumb rules for mutants.

None of them sound like a "main" book

Yes, give us more shark.

Slow stuff the hell down.

Stop introducing mutants en masse and "Batman Begins" their butts.

I want to see them well-developed as characters.

BUILD TIME WALL

Have more of spiderman coming in to call them out on their shit.

>Rule 3: Stop creating fucking new characters. I don't know why anybody complains about the lack of new mutants. Fuck that. We have so many already, we have to kill them in buses. Let all the new characters be Inhumans, who gives a fuck. If you're writing an X-Book, you're focusing on characters that already exist. If you're a diva and threaten to quit or whatever then fine, create ONE. The limit is one, and it better be fucking important to the goddamn story, otherwise why the fuck are you overpopulating a franchise that is alredy small to begin with.
Grant Morrison did a good job with his OC though

Not being in constant near-extinction status mode, not focusing on the O5 or "classic" characters and giving that sense of a growing, changing group of people you used to get back in the 80s, not having constant events, and getting people who can actually fucking write team books.

Most of these, however, would necessitate that X-Men sell the kind of numbers they did back in the day when New Mutants of all things could get dozens upon dozens of issues with a crossover here and there at most, and that's just not fucking happening. If you brought back Generation X now, for example, it'd die on the vine after 18 issues at most.

The market isn't healthy enough for the kind of great X-Men stories you remember. Sales may be up in some areas, but they're not steady. Dropoff over time is so drastic that nothing can last. Even the big books need constant shakeups.

Yes do this.

Bendis killed X-men

Get a real writer on there and sales will shoot back up to ASM levels

Evil Klaus Nomi?!

Nope. Bendis numbers were didn't trail off into the netherworld, but problem is, even with that, it's still not enough to stay away from the Marvel model as is. For the current kind of market, Bendis' X-Men sales would've even be considered pretty damn solid, but they, like literally almost everything else, are bolstered by events, crossovers, and all kinds of bullshit meant to engage with the ever shrinking core market.

Changing the writer won't fix your problem here. It might boost sales a little. To get the kind of thing where you could read X-Men for 100 issues without a half-year long event interrupting shit every goddamn year, the entirety of the market, not just Marvel, would need a drastic change.

Mind you, even 80s comics sales as a whole were way down from what they used to be before the 70s crash.

ASM sells great, but it too cannot be its own thing, it's trapped in the same prison as X-Men. Constant, constant events, crossovers, no sense of really being its own book and having the room to tell its own story while existing in a larger universe. Everything ties in now.

A change of a writer might improve the individual quality, but it can't fix everything. You're talking both an editorial and industry issue.

Oh my god I can totally see it.

Perlmutter, please.

>Beast was fine until a few years ago
I DON'T CARE

IS HE O5?

THEN FUCKING NUKE HIM

Bring back Cyclops, stop pretending any other character is worth a fuck in that role. Kitty isn't a leader. Storm isn't a leader. Wolverine was never a leader. Don't make him field leader, he's the guy who sends teams places.

Ditch the other O5. Dig up some random collection of old "new mutants" and try to build them up, or kill some off whenever the fuck.

Stop making everything the end of all mutants ever. Fuck off with the inhumans shit: no one cares. Let the X-men make some progress against the whole in universe "fuck mutants" thing for once and let it stick for a while.

You know, let them have fun and shit.

How can Bendis have killed a franchise when he didn't do anything with it.

Is this about Cyclopsfagging?

>Bring back Cyclops, stop pretending any other character is worth a fuck in that role. Kitty isn't a leader. Storm isn't a leader. Wolverine was never a leader. Don't make him field leader, he's the guy who sends teams places.
nah, bring back Xavier

He brought back the O5

They killed and brought him back as often as they did Jean. No more Xavier.

>Kitty isn't a leader.
She's leading an important team currently. If she's gonna go back to be overshadowed by Mr. Punch Dimension again, then hope she never goes back.

>brought him back as often as they did Jean.

More often.
Jean's only died like, three times.
Xavier's died like, 7.

Killing off Jean would be a good start

It's a status quo thing

Stories just work better with him being in the position he is in

Magneto also needs to go back to being an actual villain

Can we even do it with Marvel's current attitude and the market as it is? (and by that I mean, what fucking market?)

When people outside the old-guard core think of the X-Men or even Marvel, they think of the TV/Cinema screen incarnations of characters. Let this sink in; Jessica Jones, fuck, even Foggy from Daredevil, is more recognizable to anyone with a Netflix subscription than literally any of your favorite/the biggest heroes who haven't had a TV appearance.

How can anything that doesn't resemble these teams and characters thrive, when the larger market is these people getting into comics? They want the MCU Avengers. They want Jackman Wolverine. X-Force, what the fuck is that, why is Mystique a bad guy? Where's Xavier? This is different and it scares and confuses me.

It hurts, because I love X-23 and am actually finding her run as Wolverine to be promising... but I know she is going to be back as a supporting character in second-rate team books within a few years, unless she takes over from Wolverine in the cinematic team.

Pick up Morrison's vision.
Enough with the fucking angst.
Might have to kill Quesadilla first.