Homestuck

I present you the three characters that ruined Homestuck.

And no, Vriska is just a plot device.

Home stuck is shit anyway. Back to Tumblr with you.

okay terezi was always fuckin obnoxious
and dave used to be fun but then he became a huge killjoy and that's pretty emblematic of the comic's decline
but wtf did dirk do

Jake

We're allowed to be here

I accepted retconned Dave enjoys having alien cock up his ass. I accepted he loves Karkat's bulge so much, his only source of nutrition on the whole meteor trip was from the genetic material fed to him through daily blowjobs. I have accepted that Dave is a faggot, and that he is proud of it. He is free to wear a rainbow flag around his waist while Karkat frots with him. They are free to make out while reading Hunk Rump magazine. They are free to 69 each other in fulfillment of Karkat's symbol. I have accepted Dave will never be with Jade, since she does not have alien balls to suck on. Dave is the epitome of homosexuality, and that I can agree that is canon.

That doesn't mean Davekat isn't really dumb though.

>dave ruined homestuck
more like homestuck ruined dave

NO YOU AREN'T YOU FUCKING FEMINIST TUMBLRITE. LEAVE. NOW

>all three characters were told by a different piece of lord english to 'ascend to the highest point of the building' (dave by bro[AR], terezi by gamzee, dirk by caliborn)
>all three carried lil cal up with them
>their final battle was together, against jack english, at the highest point of a building

Calm down there edgelord

No character ruined Homestuck. The writing did.

Drink bleach please.

Opinions on the name 'Imperi Posein'?

they chose a pretty shit place to fight desu
like the rooftop of a fuckhuge tall crypt
don't you think that's a little bit dangerous oh golly gee4

This troll whore needs to get fucked hard!

I want that troll whore to bend me over and fuck me hard.

name sounds a little too contrived

If you actually lurked these threads you'd know that we are extremely different from the tumblr fanbase you midnight shitposter.

We bitch about how it isn't good anymore and tumblr never realized it became not-good in the first place.

Is it possible for you to send a Paradox Clone into your session twice and have one end up as your guardian?

Draw her naked and I'll tell you

what happens if you kiss a dead doomed self from another timeline with your dreamself still around

>jack english's powers ultimately came from caliborn killing yaldabaoth
>when jack english was beheaded, his head exploded and killed yaldabaoth
pottery

Oh, geez, why'd you answer my question with another question?

what, you mean like, do the ectobiology twice?

do paradox clones have bellybuttons??????

they're both about having two of you in a session

>YOU CAN'T FUCKING DO THAT.
Do what.
>GO BACKWARDS.
This isn't backwards stupid. It's forwards.
After all the trickster shit happened.
>NO. I MEAN.
>BACKWARDS BY AN "ACT".
>OR I GUESS. AN "ACT ACT ACT"?
>ARGH. I HATE THE THINGS I'M FORCED TO SAY. AND ACKNOWLEDGE AS REAL. BECAUSE OF YOU.
I can go back all the act act acts I want.
The act act acts are kind of meaningless anyway.
Besides, trickster mode was getting obnoxious.
>NO IT WASN'T!
Yes it was.
>NO.
Yes.
>NO.
Let's not do the Equius yes/no thing.
>IT WAS GREAT. IT WAS THE BEST THING I EVER UNLOCKED. FROM YOUR BULLSHIT MONITORS.
>DON'T ERASE THE ONLY AWESOME THING. I EVER SAW THESE ASSHOLES DO. ASIDE FROM DYING.
What are you talking about? I didn't erase it. It was still a thing that happened.
Do you really think I have the power to make something unhappen??
I would have to be a wizard to do that. And as we both know perfectly well, magic is fake as shit.

I think we all know which character ruined homestuck

Well, yeah, that and that's basically what John did. I think, I mean, somewhat.
Yes? Oh, Gosh, I don't know. ;(
I guess. :/

If you just ectobiologise twice one of them's probably going to be a mutant.

Was the mutation ever specified? Wait, what if Dave/Dirk and Rose/Roxy are actually mutants and that's why their eyes are weird? :O

if they're albino then it would be super weird for nobody to ever mention it

Skin as white as a ghost!

Something about her design seems a bit bland. Maybe a gold belt and/or necklace? It looks like she should have more jewelry considering Eridan's and Feferi's outfits

I don't have any complaints about the name, though

>that one fic where John, Jake, Dave and even Dirk take turns on fucking Rose

Maybe they're just being nice since the only people who would think that would be abnormal would be John and Jane, maybe.

I've never read Homestuck, but that middle one with the horns looks pretty cool

did that guy ever post the sburb tabletop rules

wouldn't Rose burst into flames after like two minutes on her land

Didn't Karkat call them "pink" one time?

>dave
>white

maybe that's why she never did her land quest and tried to break the game

Depends on the amount of UV radiation. It might just have been the equivalent of staying indoors with fluorescent lighting

Even if they weren't albino, they'd still have weirdo eyes and that's enough to support my fanfiction bait headcannon.

Dirk had the most potential of the alpha kids, but ended up becoming an embodiment of everything wrong with the later parts of Homestuck (aka relationship drama that nobody should give a fuck about, shoving homosexuality in to appeal to the tumblr crowd.)
Wouldn't even be mad about Dirk being gay if he wasn't handled in such a weird "rapey" way.

>Vriska will never rape you
Why live?

can fluorescent light diffract like that
is there a scientist in the house

why was this beautiful land wasted so badly

Why would you be mad about Dirk being gay in the first place?

>When you pick a random shirt from da Goodwill an' scrawny-ass white kids start yellin' weird bullshit at you

...

why was jade's land so boring

Why was John's land so comfy?

Because he was handled in a weird rapey way that gave way to relationship drama horseshit?

I honestly feel like Hussie had no idea what to do with Rose after Cascade. I get the strange feeling that she was supposed to take Terezi's and Roxy's place guiding John, but that was scrapped when she became Kanaya's love interest, and Hussie had to build up that John/Roxy relationship.
Again, shipping is cancer to Homestuck.

It took me a second to remember what Jade's land even was; I probably would've forgotten if not for Sunslammer.

>Not liking Snow worlds
It was a shame that it all melted.

the two big reasons would probably be
1. expectations and headcanons created for Bro being invalidated
2. perception that hussie was pandering to a different group of fans
you can probably tell why bro being gay was controversial around here back in 2011

boy hasn't worked a day in his life to earn homosexual sex

I was honestly more upset about Rose being made gay.

Why do you think he had potential?

Rose stopped being interesting because she was originally THE snarky asshole. Then a whole race of snarky assholes appeared.

>those gold arm and leg coverings
make them cyan or dark red and we have a deal

Seriously, I am uncomfortably attracted by them for some reason

>being made gay
>implying implications

>that one fic where Latula...

>Implying implications about implications.
>Implying she was always gay.

Was in a very loving relationship?

I guess those John/Rose teases never existed then.

Say you marry Johndesce. How would the honeymoon play out?

WITH CRONUS!

What is bi, poly, or demi for $500 Alec

Yeah, Rose being lesbian felt cliche as fuck, which is kind of funny for a guy who said that he didn't do John/Rose because it was cliche.

Because he had such a strong introduction. You have this guy who's kind of like Dave, but he's far more intellectual in his approach to irony. Not to mention he tinkers with robotics and was built up as being this sort of puppet master. But then he actually enters the game, and is regulated to relationship drama. He ends up feeling mostly pointless after Dirk: Unite. Most of the Alpha kids do, actually, outside of Roxy.

...

>1. expectations and headcanons created for Bro being invalidated
So him not liking puss has that much of a devastating effect on headcanons? Dude lived surrounded by puppet dong and was clearly insane, I doubt he got laid much either way.

>I was honestly more upset about Rose being made gay.
Did you want her to get pregnant and have babies and shit with some dude? Who fucking cares. That shit is old.

>queer people never tease their str8 friends

...

The ones in the narrative itself.

>poly, demi
What the Heck, Liveblogger?

Also, it's more of a problem that she's a lesbian out of nowhere which ruined some of my favorite ships. ;/

Bisexuality is more common in women than men. Why do people always forget that?

>poly, or demi

>So him not liking puss has that much of a devastating effect on headcanons?
well yeah
because being a homosexual is an act of sincerity
damages his credibility as a master ironicist

Latula didn't find it disgusting when her stomach got inflated with violet semen.

women do that shit for attention.

It looks like it could be possible with blue, violet, and yellow as the CMY. The contents of the atmosphere and/or ocean might filter out some of the other colors, or the blue and green combine into cyan and the red and violet combine into magenta. Physics wasn't my forte, though, and doing spectra in chemistry was a pain, so if anyone else has inputs, feel free

It's a shame

Goddammit I was supposed to include the spectrum

here

>sending a msg half an hour after someone was last online
Double Dammit

The gloves and thigh guards feel really reminiscent of early MK ninjas to be honest

Don't like the gloves. Keep the footies though.

Anyone else remember when we all wanted RoseMary to be about sharp-tongued, classy lipstick lesbians?

Man, those were the times.

Still too much clothing

yeah

It's easy access

That's all that counts

cuckanaya...

Another failure of the writer
That rose is a qt

One of the many things lost when Mad King Fauntleroy ascended to his Throne of Lies and established the Court of Disappointment

You clearly don't remember the old days with Rose's horrifically xenophilic tainted womb.

>poly or demi
I usually give you a pass for Derscest but come on

Christ. That is almost exactly what I was thinking of, thanks.

MK ninjas?

>Did you want her to get pregnant and have babies and shit with some dude?

its still cucking even if its a huge squid

man when did liking threesomes become a /hst/ sin

How is Kanaya impregnating Rose cucking, user you're fucking meme'd the hell out