Gather round Sup Forums, and I'll tell you the story of Candle Jack. It begins a long time ago, in a dista

Gather round Sup Forums, and I'll tell you the story of Candle Jack. It begins a long time ago, in a dista

>dista
Dista what? That's not a word! What were you going to say!? What story were you going to give us!? We can't accept this kind of weak start. If you're going to talk about some kind of entity, then we need to know! What is this Candlejack!? What do you have to tel

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I think there's a thuuuumbtack under my fanny.

>fanny
LONDON!?

This is important.

Elkton Maryland.

How in the world is Boco ever important?

Candlejack
This meme stopped being funny about a week after it started. Faggots.

Shit the fuck up Boco

Man, I can't imagine the dedication you had to finish that post while being tied up.

He's been posting on Sup Forums since about two weeks before it was created; I'm pretty sure the board would collapse if he disappeared.

Perhaps he made a deal. Or perhaps it was Mr. Jack himself posting.

Beetlejuice
Beetlejuice
Beetlejuice
Candlejack
...HA, nothing ha-

Pfft, why would you even try for Beetlejuice. Candlejack is much better...oh cra

If we keep going like this we won't have anybody left to post on this board.

I have an idea. Hey Candlejack, did to know that the Hekawi Indian tribe was a long time joke from Johnny Carson and that the F Troop cannon was a Model 1819 Walking Stick?

Boo.

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This meme sucks. You still have to hit enter for the comment

That's not scary, just saying boo. We haven't even seen you yet.

Scream.

Can we please not bring this meme back? The Candlejack shit was hardly funny the first ti

I'm new, I came from tumblr. What's with all this candlejack shit. I don'

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Everyone knows Candlejack posts the comment for you and is even nice enough to solv

I'm gonna need more rope.

AAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!

I sometimes wonder if his name isn't actually Candlejohn, and he only kidnaps people because he hates the being called Jack.

The candlejack meme is too fucking old. Just let it die alread

Hey Sup Forums, wanna go and grab a mint?

NT LAND, I AKU, THE SHAPE SHIFTING MASTER OF DARKNESS, UNLEASHED AN UNSPEAKABLE EVIL! BUT A FOOLISH SAMURAI WARRIOR WIELDING A MAGIC SWORD STEPPED FORTH TO OPPOSE ME. BEFORE THE FINAL BLOW WAS STRUCK, I TORE OPEN A PORTAL IN TIME AND FLUNG HIM INTO THE FUTURE, WHERE MY EVIL IS LAW! NOW THE FOOL SEEKS TO RETURN TO THE PAST, AND UNDO THE FUTURE THAT IS AKU!

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It must be a lot of fun being one of those hands.

That one guy by her head must be embarrassed, though, look at him struggling to even make it through the wall.

OH SHIT IT'S CANDLEJACK EVERYONE RU

Forget the rope, I'm going to go charter a bus.

What's a mint?

No, seriously, they give no indication of what a "mint" actually is, except that it's apparently very filling and you need to lick your fingers afterwards.

BELIEVE IT...OR NOT.

A mint is where they manufacture money-- originally coins, but also paper. As a building, a mint would indeed be very filling, and the finger-licking is probably to the ink for the bills getting everywhere.

An interesting note: while all kinds of money are made in a mint, we say that paper money is "printed", while coins are still "minted". "In mint condition" originally referred to bills that had not yet become rumpled or dog-eared, as though they were fresh from the mint, though the term has since come to mean any item that is still in a state that seems fresh from manufacture.

Oh.

Okay.

Who are you to tell my story? Just about everything there is wrong.

At least Candlejack is nice enough to post our posts before he ta

I love that joke. It's like that thing with, you ever see F Troop where they say "Agarn you're going to wear this dress" and Agarn is all "I'm not wearing that dress, I'm not wearing that dress" and they wipe and blblblblbl and Agarn's wearing a dress

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