Who would win?

who would win?

Dan

DAN

Probably Dan. Fry if he had 100 cups of coffee in his system. Xavier if the contest was a Shakashuri Blowdown.

Damn right

Dan 1v1 and all at once

My Money is on Dan for being an angry fucker, but what if Hanks family was threatened? Would he surpass his anger?

You know damn well Hank would win if they were actually fighting. A propane tank to the head will do pretty much anyone in.

Dan, no question.
He may destroy himself too, but he will win.

What if they insulted Ladybird and propane

Damn, I forgot about Tim.

Dan would win even if they all teamed up.

Dan would use the propane for the bomb he'll set off.

Dan.

Hank. He would tie the long hair on their head to the short hair on their ass and kick them down the street

Xavier, hands down. That nigga been through some shit.

Hank DESTROYS giblet heads

>All these people saying Dan
Xavier would win, and find peace afterwards

Honestly

Dan

Xavier is the only real danger to Dan, but after the first encounter, Dan would come up with a plan to make Xavier fight Xavier while Xavier watches from a rooftop to go in for the kill and snap Dan's neck only to find out that Dan was Xavier all along and Xavier was Dan making Dan the winner.

>Please,
>WALK AWAY (walk away...)
>I can't be responsible for what I'll do if you beat me to death.

Fry, by sheer luck.

Dan's from what show?

hank smash

Bojack is 1200 pounds and roughly the size of a human. He could probably slaughter them all with his density.

Dan Vs.

Hank Hill.

Dan

Mark, Fry or Dan. They're the three most successful and witty there. Mark deals with crazy shit daily. Dan has the bloodlust and a life experience of schemes. Fry is a happy go lucky space adventurer.

Bojack if everyone is unarmed. He'd be unlucky enough to live another day.

didn't mean to reply to

I feel like mark is too nice to be a real danger

>implying he'd ever let himself die
He's pulled out of all sorts of horrid situations. Depends on the context of what 'winning' is.

This maybe personal bias but Fry, he has been in physical danger a lot more than most of those guys and come out on top.

My boy Dan

>TAKE THAT!
>TASTE THE PAIN!

Ah, it a quizical conundrum about fictional fights.

Only Adolf Shitler would pose such a frank query. Well Mr. Nazi, I've got a question that will break your concentration. What makes you think that I wouldn't win Hanz down?

My know how and my "no, how" have led me to win the chance to lose many fights. Victory is hollow prospect. A man could mine it for years and nary a canary would bore fruits of labor.

I have already beaten your fist in with my face more than several times. There's no need for you to taste the pain, I've already swallowed my share of the load.

>people actually think Fry, Mark, or Bojack have even a shot at winning

dan is the instrument of some pagan war god of some sort. he can't lose

Hank, if they made him mad and he said he was going to kick their asses.

Fry, too many godlike beings are interested in him and there's no doubt going to be time travel shenanigans if he actually dies.
>Bojack kills Fry
>Fry returns with a Scooty Puff Sr.

Other than that Bojack, he weighs as much as a horse so he's got some insane muscle density.

Obviously NOT Tim who's suppose to have the body of a child and never displayed any significant feat of bravery of strength in the entire series.

Beavis if probably the second weakest after Tim.

Xavier always gets his ass beat and has never really shown a capacity for violence.

Bojack is the biggest of everyone, but is old and out of shape.

Dan is diminutive in size and strength, but cunning and ruthless.

I don't know anything about F is for Family guy.

Fry without worms/coffee is always shown to be lazy, dumb and pudgy.

I gotta give it to Hank. He's brave, relatively fit, and has demonstrated his ability to kick ass on numerous occasions.

Definitely Dan

>has demonstrated his ability to kick ass on numerous occasions.

Has he really?

All the times I've seen hank fight, he wins just because he intimidates his opponent.

Dan and Bojack. Bojack is a horse after all. 1200lbs.

He's obviously not 1200 lbs, he's only a head taller than Todd. The animal form entirely a stylistic design. Princess Caroline isn't the size of an actual cat now is she?

>1200 pounds
I thought he was a man-sized horse, not a horse-sized horseman

I'm confident that if he was presented with enough of a challenge, his stubbornness and spite would incite a session of preptime bullshit that would rival Batman.

And as we've all seen, preptime will destabilize any such debate.

The misuse of propane would make Hank more powerful than you could ever imagine.

>What makes you think that I wouldn't win Hanz down?

Perfect.

All I can think is that all these characters would be great for a Poker Night game.

Arthur Reed

Beavis would win by not bothering to compete

It will come down to Dan vs. Hank, and Dan would probably win.

Hank was punched by an ex Dallas cowgirls lineman wearing a superbowl ring and shrugged it off. Hank is tough as fuck.

His surname is literally horseman

also he says in the show that because he weighs 1200 pounds it takes a lot of booze to get him drunk

>also he says in the show that because he weighs 1200 pounds it takes a lot of booze to get him drunk

They also had a scene where Todd won a lawsuit against Disney because of a typo. Oh and nobody could recognize a child in an overcoat for because jokes. A lot of wacky dumb shit played entirely for jokes is said in Bojack.

Bojack clearly doesnt weigh 1200 lbs.

What ever happened to Dan Vs? Were the threads good here

beautiful. this is pretty much what i was imagining. xavier would win just cause he would start talking before you realize it, a bunch of time has passed and you're in a completely different place and you forgot there was ever a fight

I'm convinced that no in this Fred actually knows Frank other than OP. Frank would win. Mother fucker was in Korea.

WHO THE FUCK IS THIS DAN

>I'm convinced that no one in this thread actually knows Frank other than OP. Frank would win. Mother fucker was in Korea.

>Mother fucker was in Korea

and? He's a middle-aged heavy drinker who lives a sedentary lifestyle.

He'd sooner kneel over from hypertension than kick ass.

Who the hell is middle left.

Dan.
One way or another he triumphed over murderous shit like demons,cyborgs and supervillains.
Hell, I'm sure he could take on Death itself if the life of Mr. Mumbles was threatened.

xavier renegade angel

I think it'll be an ending fight between Dan and Hank

This and by then Hank will already be in rage mode
Also dan can't kick an ass that does not exist

Dan, only because he wins out of spite.
Also he survived a black hole/wormhole and going back in time. He's also worked for and beaten Satan/a high powered demon.

tord obviously

Xavier. But only because he would be trying to get them all to get along, and inadvertently murder them all because he is terrible at trying to help.

would dan still win if he was a girl

>clearly

It's a cartoon, he isn't real. In the cartoon however he is a horseman who weighs 1200 pounds and thus consumes huge amounts of liquor.

If he's not not real than he obviously can't win the fight.

me: 1
You: who cares

Xavier would win but if Xavier doesnt interrupt

Of course

Dan. No debate.

Everyone else has some semblance of ethics, Dan has none.

...

Nice one.

Dan

He would be planning to kill everyone even before they met.

Xavier has inadvertently murdered pregnant men, pregnant women and babies. Beating the rest of the group would be child's play

Bojack is a humanoid horse. Didn't he claim to weigh 1200 pounds?

It's also worth noting that Hank deals with assholes like Dan all the time, and usually comes out on top. Though, the same could be said that Dan deals with people like Hank and usually manages to win out.

I think this battle might come down to whether they get help from from their respective entourage. Can Peggy, Bill, Boomhauer and Dale match Chris and Elise?

>regular ass people vs Elise
Come on.

Elise is OP

Burger contest

Who creates the better burger

She does got outsmarted all the time though.

...

Only by irregular wacky shit. From mundane all the way to super tech she is in her field.

I read it in his voice.

hank probably has better fundamentals and due to his prestige class gets a significant bonus to his cooking stat while using a propane-fueled device. similarly, the properties of cooking implements change a great deal depending on air/water pressure, which is significant if you recall that spongebob does most of his frying at the bottom of the ocean- though a specific depth isn't mentioned- so we can assume he's used to frying at a certain depth and in a matchup where he's on the surface he not only would have to contend with this difference but also the facts that he has previously dissed texas- which also would also give hank an advantage, as pride is at stake, as well as the danger of rapidly desiccating in a dry clime. of course, if the match is held in bikini bottom hank would drown.

The sponge cooks with pure love.

Spongebob has shown proficiency in cooking in various locations underwater though, so for all we know he might be super adaptable and be able to fry at any degree of pressure.

We dont cotton to freaks around here

fuckin a

>of course, if the match is held in bikini bottom hank would drown.
kek

This doesn't make sense. You have 1 guy that has done some impressively destructive shit and 1 who's been shown he can't take on anyone in it along with some mid-tier people. Is this just a stealth fanwanking post?

>1 who's been shown he can't take on anyone in it
who?

>he's watched Tim but he thinks Butthead is Beavis
what is wrong with you