Haha what a loser r-right no one could be this sad in real life surely

Haha what a loser r-right no one could be this sad in real life surely...

How long you got left till you beat him?

I'm 24 but I think I'm asexual. Or gay but afraid of the social stigma.

do you masturbate to gay porn?

Not really. I just think about kissing or having sex with dudes sometimes though.

If I were him I would have intentionally double-made sure I would remain a virgin just to go against his stupid friends. Same thing I did in high school. Not saying I could have definitely have gotten laid if I wanted to but even if I could I would have not, just to do the opposite of what my idiot classmates wanted me to do.
Though to be honest as an adult I will lie to anyone who wants to know if I'm a virgin (except my 3 closest friends). I'll just say I had sex at a party where everyone was getting drunk.

That is a bit gay to be honest family

I know, I'm just afraid of the social pressure against gays in my area and I'm not that interested in sex or being with someone in general so I'm just gonna stay single and lonely probably.

all males who have fapped have committed a gay act.
touching a dick is gay as fuck, thats a womans job.

Thank goodness I lost mine when I was 27

Its a shame you cant be how you want. Do you like girls too? I like women, as in, pictures of women, but the thought of dating and all that shit leaves me cold

He was more asexual than virgin. If it were realistic the gilf would've dumped him after his deathgrip syndrome got in the way.

10 more years. The loser had way more chances than I did. At least I have reasons, this guy had no reason.

>thank goodness

but you missed out on the best years of sex .. age 17 to 26.

Did you tell her that you were a virgin?

Luckily I lost mine at 14 to my 15 year old girlfriend so I never had to grow up a virgin

Asexuality is a meme

So there is still hope ?

How do you pee?

Not them but I changed to holding it with a downward v shape. More stately this way.

I've known 2 girls in my life that I sort of wanted to be romantically involved with maybe, but only the dating/watching movies together/cuddling part. I don't think I would really enjoy having sex with a woman. And I'd probably have to just rely on physical stimulation to get a boner but even then it would probably suck, no pun intended.
I also kind of want to meet someone for whom we are both mutually the most important person on earth to each other but that's probably impossible.

I know. I fucked around a lot during my teenage years but never actually had sex. Wasn't even a bad looking guy, just too shy/awkward or whatever.

Yeah, she didn't believe me though.

We're all gonna make it bro

Why don't I experience sexual attraction then? please explain.

You might have fucked up hormones, user.

Also, same, yes I do find them attractive in photos and when they dress well and all that.

How is that different than saying "I'm asexual"? ._.
Asexuality refers to the result, not the cause.

"There's someone out there for everyone," they say.

Really? The logician in me does not think this is possible.

That someone they are talking about is a cheap prostitute with low standards I think.

Same here. I am physically attracted to women but sexually attracted to men. I have had sex but think it's pretty overrated t b h so I just stay celibate.

I dunno, I was just attempting to clue him in on a possible reason why he doesn't have any sexual urges.

T-t-t-thanks

>I am physically attracted to women but sexually attracted to men.
Nice, high five! Not saying it's necessarily a good thing but it's cool to know that someone else feels the same way.

Wild and free

10 more years

What about the hooker with a heart of gold that will fall in love with me like True Romance? And then I'll kill her pimp and we'll runs this possible? off to Cancun? Is this possible?

I hate that trope, prostitutes are garbage.

Wow that really made no sense, fucking typing how does it work

Fake, where is his staff and pointy hat?

i wonder how many 40 year old virgins actually exist. it's easy to get laid, but it's easier to not get laid.

Lost it a month before I turned 24. I was a shy kissless virgin. If I can do it you can do it to.

kek. Didn't he have some weird stuff in his room though? I haven't seen it in ages so I forgot.

in that case it kinda makes sense, if she wasn't lying slater was like her third trick.

prostitutes are also mostly victims, usually they were abused and manipulated by their pimp before becoming one

Good job user. I also think that a friend of mine claimed to be a virgin at 25 or 26 and he was dating some chick recently. Though they broke up and he's a Catholic so he may be saving for marriage.

1/4th of the japs above 30 are still virgins.

Anyone ever go to the hilarious IMDB board of this movie when it still existed?

>8/10 threads were just people crying about being virgins
>this guy named Bowser who hated that women just like "bad boys" so he thought they should be enslaved and men should be assigned one so he could finally get laid

>this guy named Bowser who hated that women just like "bad boys" so he thought they should be enslaved and men should be assigned one so he could finally get laid

so you never wash your dick?

If sex is needed to be healthy, shoudn't we get welfare hookers?

>tfw you realize Elliot killed some dudes and chicks that weren't attractive at all
>tfw you know that if he had run into you the day he lost it he would have killed you too even though you are a virgin like him
I will never feel anything for these mass killers. I always think they would have killed me too if I was just unlucky to cross paths with them as a stranger on that particular day.

I'm just waiting for 3D CGI VR sex.
>inb4 it already exists
Not it doesn't, stop saying it does. Sure there are some attempts like 360ยบ porn but it's not what I mean, I mean a hyper realistic, purely interactive, CGI sex experience.

oh no I'm so sorry lol

I think its the element of touch that is most important. At the very least we should get state-funded cuddle-buddies.

>tfw not felt the touch of a woman for years

Is this movie good? I loved it when it first came out but haven't seen it in like 8 years.

Bowser sounds like /ourguy/

I still think it should have ended with him not having sex, or it should have gone over a bit more after the woman inevitably breaks up with him. He didn't get too much character growth anyway, it was basically Peer Pressure: The Movie.
Idk if it was just not accurate or if people like him really exist. I think guys who are virgins at that age either don't care about "finding the special someone" or never find it.

This thread makes me want to kill myself.

Don't, you will miss a bunch of kinos that will be released in the following years

If by "weird" you mean "collectibles and toys", yeah, I think so.

>tfw a co-worker walked into my office one time and told me he thought about me while he was watching The 40 Year Old Virgin because I had a few Star Wars figures on a bookshelf

Like what, more capeshit and disney blockbusters?
I'm ending my suffering right now.

The more virgins that kill themselves, the more unique and special I feel.

I can still fuck 17 year olds

Lost my virginity when I was 18

lost my virginity when I was 19

I lost my virginity when I was 20

Lost my virginity when I was 21.

You can't lose if you don't play.

>Be 18 have super sexual two year rlshp with big titted cutie
>Dump her at 20 'cos emo scene girls
>They're nuts. Realize most women are terrible at sex. Fuck I miss cutie even if she never wore make-up
>...
>12 years later
>handful of failed one night stands with friendzones willing to fuck but not rlshp

Would rather be pure virgin wizard than crap battlemage.

>tfw 37 year old virgin NEET with no friends

lost mine at 23
haven't had sex since (i'm 34)

Maybe try to join a charity group where there are people your age

>15
>gf who is now wife is also 15 but 10 months younger than me
>says she wants to do it now because she knows she'll want it more when she is 16 but will be statutory rape
and that is how i lost my virginity to my wife at 15

how the fuck are you still a neet at 37

I don't see myself following a different fate than that user, tbqhwyrnngl.

26 years old here.

I had a solid lie about losing my virginity at 18 but at this point it's just as embarrassing my friends thinking I haven't had sex for 8 years.

you have wizard powers, that's likely much better

how would you survive

I guess by relying on my family and making some few bucks by selling drawings or some shit. My mom's cousin is 40 something and she's currently a NEET, has been for a while. She lives on the wealth of her family. I don't think the rest of the family appreciates her lifestyle but she's my role model. She's like a hippie bohemian chick. She seems to be having a good time, especially since her father died and she inherited his house because the rest of the family let her move there.
Idk if I will be lucky as her, my parents keep telling me I should get a job. But they aren't too strict. I'm 24.

well, in america you can survive with gibs checks for the treatment of meme diseases, like carpal tunnel syndrome.
t. europoor who've watched sopranos and noticed how janice survived

ITT: "I'm not a failure with women, I'm probably gay or something..."

lmao, fucking losers.
Well, I guess that just means more pussy for Chad (i.e. me)

I never claimed not to be a failure with women or that it didn't bother me. I admit to that AND add that I may be gay.
>implying stuff

I wonder how many people posting in this thread even watched this movie. He was portrayed as a mostly normal guy while his friends who regularly had sex were annoying and obnoxious

she's very fortunate then
other than your parents, who are most likely only getting by on SS by the time their "child" is in his late 30's, you're going to be very hard pressed to find someone who's going to give you a free ride for more than a month
steady disability payments aren't quite as easy to get irl as the tv makes it out desu

Sex is overrated.

What the fuck is this post?

how were they annoying and obnoxious?

It is, but you should still have it at least once to understand all the hubbub.