More Reasons Why America Is Shit - Thread #55014015

youtube.com/watch?v=8w8AoMT5Y5k

>American exceptionalism builds a water slide
>decapitates kids

Why is American (non-military) engineering so fucking useless? Why are 'state-schools' allowed to offer degrees?

Other urls found in this thread:

linkedin.com/in/jeff-henry-9130501b
youtube.com/watch?v=tFrgXqYCgys
youtube.com/watch?v=56gYUxlRBHs
youtube.com/watch?v=cxtD3QOrNXw
youtube.com/watch?v=BUgg6nciY40
youtube.com/watch?v=mVgbkKSoOYM
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I genuinely wanna know hot he got 'decapitated'. I doubt he was fully decapitated, but if so how? That's a safety net, not a wire mesh.

Itd be strong as hell and he would have been moving very very fast

A

this a million times

Is this the "Religion of Peace" ride ive been hearing about?

Basically a bunch of typical American fat asses who got their petroleum engineering degree from Northeastern West Virginia Tech created a water slide between eating their afternoon Five Guys Burger and Fries and their evening ShakeShack binges. They didn't test anything properly and their American minds used fishing line and pipelines as a safety net.

What I heard, it wasn't the slide itself per-se, but the device he was on going down the slide that decapitated him. He came loose from the harness I think and the harness decapitated him.

That or I just came up with that scenario as it made the most sense to me.

Don't worry the free market will fix it. He died BECAUSE of regulations not due to a lack of them.

>10 seconds on the kids death
>rest of the video is about how cool the ride is

What the fuck

Probably the supports for the net fucked him up.

I first became aware of this about ten years ago, the summer my oldest boy, Bill Jr. died. You know that carnival comes into town every year? Well this year they came through with a ride called The Mixer. The man said, "Keep your head, and arms, inside The Mixer at all times." But Bill Jr, he was a DAAAREDEVIL, just like his old man. He was leaning out saying "Hey everybody, look at me! Look at me!" Pow! He was decapitated! They found his head over by the snow cone concession.

A few days after that, I open up the mail, and there's a pamphlet in there from Pueblo, Colorado, and it's addressed to Bill, Jr., and it's entitled, "Do you know what the queers are doing to our soil?"

I'm calling it as the kid was either in the front or the back, the weight distribution was fucked because amerifats, the thing caught air and his chin met one of the metal cross bars that holds up the net.

Also in the video, that helicopter shot, a ton of blood in the water at the bottom of the slide... dude def. had his shit all fucked up and probably riped his head off his neck.

Theres apparently metal rings spaced put to hold the rope nets up, he mightve hit one of those

Holy shit just look at that drop. Why the duck would you want to do that.

Are there no regulations there?

It'll get worse if Trump removes common core entirely instead of having it reformed by education experts

Five guys gives you so many fries

So, if he was sitting in the back, a weight shift that makes the raft catch air might put his tiny child neck in the way of a metal support bar at 45mph with the weight of two adults in front of him
I forget highschool physics, but that seems like the kind of momentum that could rip a head off

That's what I think. They look like metal bars that could clothes-line an airborne person. Such a stupid design.

Notice the blood toward the first launch area? Like the other user said, the craft must have become airborne and the kid's neck head must have hit the bar keeping the netting in place.

Why would a kid ever be allowed to ride that?

dude fuck off I just graduated from csu channel islands in water entertainment engineering

air resistence, he was going to fast and his head fell off

kek

Image you are riding in a car on the freeway going 65 mph and there is a "safety" net outside your window. Imagine now that you device to stick your arm into the net and net die its job catching your arm... However your still strapped into this car going 65 mph.

What do you think would happen next?

I noticed this too. God bless America.

Because it's fun.

...

I heard someone say they heard "Allah Akbar" but it was just the ride creaking.

BAN ASSAULT WATER SLIDES!

How did the kid die? Fucking formula one speeds don't mean nothing if you don't tell me that. That's some shitty journalism.

wtf I hate fun in the sun now #IndoorsWhores

>Why is American (non-military) engineering so fucking useless? Why are 'state-schools' allowed to offer degrees?

It sucks but I wouldn't lose my head over it.

>wouldn't lose my head over it
>55

>be forgiving and ever so tolerant Canuck
>shitpost

decapitation doesn't mean sliced off, his head could've been ripped right off if it was going fast enough
also remember he's a little boy, not a grown man

What do we know about their education?

According to the Verruckt Slid wiki, the slide was designed by Jeff Henry & John Schooley.

Here is Jeff Henry's Linkedin:

linkedin.com/in/jeff-henry-9130501b

I don't have a Linkedin account so I can't see if he has an education section. Any of you Linkedin fags help me out?

I can't find anything on John Schooley.

I'm curious what schools they went to.

>build dangerous ride
>find out you need atleast 400lbs for it to be safe
>load the raff up with a tiny kid and two skinny females
>surprised when he goes flying and gets his head tore off

if you let your child on these dangerous rides, you're a bad parent. why would you even take the risk? if i had a kid i would let he or she on the farris wheel much less this giant ass slide

i wouldn't let he or she*

>one accident happens on a very dangerous ride
>somehow means the entire country is shit

sorry canada but you will always be the poor mans america

the pepsi to the coke,the supermarket frozen pizza to a dominos and the console to a pc

a shitty version of america

i wanna see what his body looks like

I'm not seeing any education listed.

so he flew off i guess?

If that kid was airborn enough to hit one of those rings with his neck he was going to die anyway after freefalling to the bottom of that slide.

youtube.com/watch?v=tFrgXqYCgys

He probably has no formal education then. It looks like he started working construction out of high school.

My dad almost fell to his death on a waterslide at Aqualandia, a water park in Spain.

On another one he badly hurt his arm.
These are slides that are just straight drops down before the slide curves into you.

>supermarket frozen pizza to a dominos
but frozen pizza is better than dominos. pretty much anything is better than dominos.

Freedom isn't free you stupid faggot

Affirmative action is destroying American quality. We no longer put our best on top, instead we cut them down in an attempt to prop the bottom up.

there is a slide like this at a water park near my house that looks more dangeorus because it doesn't have a cage outside of it. it's like a slide you would see at a play ground except it's like 50 feet in the air.

I live outside of Topeka, and went down the slide in the summer of 2015, and I didn't die. Kid probably fucked up something.

>and I didn't die
I'm so sorry, user.

Water slides are shit tier amusement rides. You get slammed around, fucking road rash and chlorine water all in your nose and eyes. No thanks

I've been on that tarzan swing and everything they said about it was complete nonsense

Me too

That's not blood, that's rust. Watch a vid, and you'll see that the red/brownish looking area is the area they jet the water out of, which shows it's just rust.

>A FUCKING LEAF

Kansas City Native here, we don't have Shake Shacks.

the cage is what killed this poor fucker.

It's not the engineering. It's the (((businessmen))) that runs it that's at fault. Cheaping out leads to tragedies like that, like how the Chinks would build roads and sidewalks that swallow people (sinkholes).

No, I'm sorry, but you did die.

Yeah, but there is a five guys at legends. No in n out though

Maybe, but without the cage he likely would have flew out and died that way. Can't win because the ride is unsafe with the harness or the kid purposely getting out and standing up as rumored.

>built the most extreme water slide on the planet, not because they're qualified enough to do so nor because they've accumulated decades of experience in building water slides, but just because MURICA
>built a tiny, shitty net on top of the slide supported by metal braces holding it in place, too weak and not built in such a way that it stops the raft from taking off, but strong enough to decapitate the passengers if something goes wrong
>spent millions of dollars on building the slide, but won't even build a tailor made raft, just went to WalMart one afternoon and bought a raft that was on sale

Alright leaf let me tell you what happened.

>Basically some dickhead teenager working the ride lets this small ass kid on the ride with some small ass ladies

>The kid doesnt have enough weight to hold him in the raft and the two ladies also don't weigh enough to hit the minimum 400 pounds

>Kid is sitting in the front and after the first dip he flies up out of his seat just enough for his chin to catch the metal bar holding the safety net

>he's ripped from the raft and his body hits both ladies in the face breaking one's jaw and fucking them both up

>The kid then slides down lifeless into the exit pool

Sorta sounds like a wire cheese cutter slicing his head in half. Like the kind they use in Jewish Deli's up here in NY to slice deli meat with - L o L !!

How the fuck even did the kid get airborne in the first place?

...

The ride is isomorphic to the country.
Like Socrates's city-soul analogy.

Why does Sup Forums jump the gun on all news? The kid could've undone his harness or something fucking stupid like that. Most tragedies at theme parks happen due to people fucking around and doing things they should not be doing.

It could go either way, wait for more information.

youtube.com/watch?v=56gYUxlRBHs

thrills are nice, but who couldve have thought something like this would happened.

ALL rides can potentially kill you.

Source?

One of the first things you learn about building water slides in Roller Coaster Tycoon is that you never, EVER launch it down a steep hill and then bring it up a hill after that. Guess the engineers that designed this shit never played RCT.

>the kid purposely getting out and standing up as
I'm betting on this

I used to do shit like that on coasters until I learned that hard way

I was standing up in order to slap the beams that the rollercoaster go under, I broke my hand, that shit hurt

underrated af

>Basically some dickhead teenager working the ride lets this small ass kid on the ride

And if he didn't, the kids politician father is likely going to get you fired. All things considered the operator did the right thing.

I can't believe nobody snapped a pic of the head, it's 2016 come on people.

tfw there's no video

alot of videos people going on the ride show women being the operators

>I was standing up in order to slap the beams that the rollercoaster go under, I broke my hand, that shit hurt

How stupid are you?

They must have had a fat fuck sit in the front seat and the kid in the back, so when the raft went over the hill it swung the back up where the kid's head got caught between the metal bar and the seat.

I'm still surprised that it would decapitate it. Seems like it would just inflict a serious to fatal injury while keeping his head attached.

Also seems pretty basic with this ride that they would seat the heaviest people in the back. I guess Kansan retards don't think things through.

How many Canadians have landed on the moon?

Homesick mexican diaspora.

Oh here he goes again. Look at you Canada, posting on Sup Forums thinking you just said some smart shit.

Out of all countries that post here Canadians are the ones that piss me off the most. Their entire fucking culture makes no sense. What exactly is it that you do? Wear flannel shirts and slurp syrup?

If I think of America I think of guns, pop culture and freedom. Sure, lots of ignorant baboons but at least they wear their retardation like a badge of honor, use it as a cultural identity, their flag promotes the unity of the country with all these stripes and stars.

Germany is orderly, a country that prides itself on its rules and their citizens who follow them. It's also the country with the biggest responsibility when it comes to destroying Europe with its two world wars and government sanctioned refugee crisis. Their flag waves strong colors, black, red and gold. A dominant flag for a dominant country.

Russia is strong and stubborn to a fault. They live hard lives and don't complain about it. Obviously the entire country is pretty much a shithole but it breeds strong people who can take care of themselves. Their flag represents the cold, the white, the blue but also the burning passion in the red, it all comes together to signify that their country is bleak but there is strength in that.

But Canada, what are they fucking known for? Being "nice", i guess? Is that your role in the world? Being fucking nice? That's not an achievement. Everyone can be nice. It's easy to be nice. You just don't have to say anything bad.
So what did your fucking country decide to put on their flag to show the entire world what Canada is all about? A leaf. A FUCKING LEAF. You decided that you like to your shitty syrup so damn much that you might as well put the fucking leaf that it's made of on the flag. You don't even respect your own country so why the hell should I.

Men have the tendency to use he a women she. Who cares what sex the operator was?

I think he was sitting in the front, with two adult women inline behind him. The weight needs to be forward on slide-type rides to prevent the front lifting at drop points.

>Well my aunt is friends with the dispatcher who answered one of the 911 calls when it happened, the biggest detail I got are that his head somehow hit part of the net or one of the bars that hold the net up and hit him between his forehead and nose. wasn't his whole head but I can only imagine it being super bloody everywhere. And I also heard his head came down before the whole tube did, saddest part was that his little brother was actually waiting at the bottom for him. :/ The lifeguard responsible for retrieving the tubes at the bottom passed out as well and had to be taken to the hospital. That's probably the most information you'll get out of this. As for it to be tricky to happen just imagine going straight down at over 65 mph and hitting your head on metal... honestly should've PMed you this but I guess there will be other curious people here too, it's only the truth. RIP caleb.

Because its a nearly vertical drop, the sign tells you to lay down and then slide off.
I jumped a little bit and was airborn for a good 8 feet.

Why wouldn't you make it a plastic tube like any other fucking water slide?
Why make this fucking deathtrap?

i'm surprised cnn hasn't interviewed the women. tfw we'll never get a first hand account of what happened

The whole incident reminds me of this disaster

>babby's first amusement park accident
these are far more interesting

youtube.com/watch?v=cxtD3QOrNXw
youtube.com/watch?v=BUgg6nciY40
youtube.com/watch?v=mVgbkKSoOYM

When they leave details like that out, it means either a Muslim, a black, or a black Muslim was responsible.

Blame the guy working there all you want but you, as a parent, shouldn't allow your kid on there

Lol Canada! Hahahahahahaha! I love Canadians even though they are the most insignificant people to ever populate our planet.

Haha, not going to lie, this was a pretty well-crafted post from a fuckin' leaf.

Thanks, guy.

I think it just took the top of his cranium off, so technically not a decapitation.

>2016
>parents actually parenting