FREEZE ASSHOLE

>I WANT YOU TO FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS CAREFULLY
>FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL BE MET WITH EXCESSIVE LETHAL FORCE
>YOU WILL CROSS YOUR FOREARMS BEHIND YOUR BACK AND TOUCH YOUR WING BONES WITH YOUR FINGERS
>HOLD YOUR HANDS IN THAT POSITION UNLESS ORDERED OTHERWISE
>NOW SING YOUR NATIONAL ANTHEM AND SQUAT TO ITS RHYTHM
>GET A SINGLE NOTE OR MOVEMENT WRONG AND I BLOW YOUR BRAINS OUT
Do you survive? I don't because I don't know the Canadian anthem very well.

>*dabs on the hater*, instantly creating a blast of force that knocks him onto the ground
>I-I S-SAID F-FREEZE, ASSHOLE
>proceed to connect Bluetooth speaker to my phone
>P-PUT IT DOWN OR YOU WILL BE SHOT
>enter "party rock anthem" into search bar
>NO WAI-
>*hit play*
>OH NO NOT AGAIN
>*officer begins to move against his own will and starts following my movements*

>*hits that whip*
>every negro within a 300 mile radius instantly fails pain on their upper back

>*WHIIIIIRRRRRR*

>because I don't know the Canadian anthem very well.

Head on back, Chang.

>NOW SING YOUR NATIONAL ANTHEM AND SQUAT TO ITS RHYTHM
Ah, I got shot.

>*hits that yeet*
Yea they hate but they broke though (They broke though)
>*officer beings to fly into the air*
And when it's time to pop they a no-show (Where they at?)
>*cop's weapons all fly into a giant flying pile*
Yea I'm pretty but I'm loco (Yeah I'm loco)
>*windows shatter*
The loud got me moving slow-mo (Shhh)
>*dogs begin barking*
Ayo Tweetie, where the hoes bro? (Where the hoes bro?)
>*cars explode*
Ayo Keys, where the hoes tho? (Yo where the hoes tho?)
>*all cops in the state suddenly fall dead*
That other nigga, he a bozo (He a bozo)
>*begin glowing*
It's M.A, you don't know hoe? (You don't know hoe?)
>*all whites in the Americas and Oceania combust*

O-oi maamme, Suomi, synnyinmaa...

wtf is a wing bone

>SIMON SAYS TOUCH YOUR NOSE
>SIMON SAYS DO A SPLIT
>TOUCH YOUR FOREHEAD
>SIMON DIDN'T FUCKING SAY *BANG* *BANG*

*teleports behind him*
Nothing personnel, kidd...

...

...

Rollin

...

*squats*
*hits that dab*
>WHAT ARE YOU D-
*WHIIIIIIIIRRRRRR*
>OH NO NOT AGAIN
>HELP! IM BEING SUCKED IN!
>NOOOOOOOO!
>FPBLBLPPFPHP
>BRRRP BRRRRPPP
>*BUUURP*

rickiddy roll

>*Slowly reach hand behind back, right down to my pants back pocket, and unfurl my Israeli citizenship as I pull it out*
>"At ease, soldier. You know what this means"
>*SWAT Operative recalls Black Ops lecture 9.11 about the apprehension of Chosen agents on his soil, lowers his rifle*
>"Stand down, squad. Sorry for interrupting your shekel counting, sir."
>A monitored National Park eagle, serial number 6,000,000 flies into the window and perches on his shoulder
>Hava Nagila plays in the background

PARTY POSTERS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT

rolllll

>patrionism
kill yourself

...

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