A Saudi girl, a Lebanese, and a Somali girl are on a plane. The plane was going to crash-land, so the Saudi girl said: "I'm going to wear all my gold, so they'd rescue me first."
The Lebanese girl said: I'm going to wear my short skirt, so they'd rescue me first."
The Somali girl said: "I'm going to strip naked, so they'd think I'm the black box."
Post Sup Forums jokes from your country!
WHY DID THE NORWEIGAN PUT BREADCRUMPETS IN HIS NOSE??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
IN ORDER TO FEED THE CROWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why did Americans have niggers while we have terroni?
Because they got to pick first! AHAHAHAHAHAHAH
dis shyt be racist yo
This is an actual joke here.
What's the difference between a black guy and a plate filled with shit ? THE PLATE
A german, a russian and an american are going to a magic swimming pool. The pool attendant says: "Name anything you want right before you jump off the springboard and the pool will be filled with exactly that, so you will be falling right into it and bathe in it."
The german shouted ot "Beer!" and landed in a pool full of beer
The russian shouted "Vodka!" and fell in a pool full of vodka
The american accidently slipped of the springboard and shouted "HOLY FUCKIN' SHIT!"
What do you do when a Belgian trows a grenade at you?
Pull out the pin and trow it back.
How do you keep a Belgian busy?
Put him in a round room and say that there is some fries in the corner.
...
Three men had married a nordic woman from Sweden, Norway and Finland
The man who had married the Swede said to the other "when we came home after the honeymoon, I told her all the chores she had to do at home. The first day I could not see anything happening, nor the next day could I see that anything had happened, but on the third day she had cleaned up the house"
The other man who had married the girl from Norway said "when we came home after the honeymoon, I told her all the chores she had to do at home. The first day I could not see anything happening, nor the next day could I see that anything had happened, but on the third day she had cleaned up the house"
The man who had married the Finn said, "The first day I told her all the chores she had to do at home. The first day I could not see anything, nor the second day could I see anything, but the third day, the swelling subsided so much that I could see the phone and dial 911"
classic
Two imperial Danish policemen, an experienced officer and a rookie, are on duty in Iceland in the 1800s. There has just been a revolt so a 10pm curfew punishable by death is declared for all Icelanders.
The Danish policemen are smoking cigarettes and chatting when an Icelander walks by, and the rookie policeman immediately pulls his rifle and fires the whole magazine into him, killing him instantly.
The officer angrily shouts "What the fuck are you doing!? It's 20 minutes to 10! You've just killed an innocent man!" to which the rookie calmly replies "No, I actually know that guy, he lives on the other side of town, he'd never make it in time." He was promptly promoted.
What was the population of Iceland at that time?
We have Belgian jokes too, desu.
>Why is there always a huge pile of shit in front of Belgian shops? Because there's a sign on the door asking them to push strongly
80 thousand maybe?
A local man is walking down the street in 1800s Copenhagen when he sees a man about to jump off a nearby tower and commit suicide. He rushes up the stairs and joins him on the roof.
"Don't do it!" The man shouts.
The jumper replies: "Why not? There is no hope for me in this cruel broken world and nothing to live for."
"That's not true, there is so much to live for, and you have to be the change that you want to see in the world," says the man. "Do you happen to be involved politically?"
"Yes, but that's exactly why, it just seems hopeless. I'm involved in the movement for freedom of speech, you see." Says the jumper
"Are you talking about the movement for freedom of speech, and freedom of assembly?" asks the man.
"Yes, the movement for freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, and the right to vote" the jumper replies
"Yes, fantastic! The movement for freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, the right to vote and the banning of torture!" The man replies
"Yes, it's the movement for freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, the right to vote, the banning of torture and freeing the slaves." says the jumper
"Aha! The movement for freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, the right to vote, the banning of torture and freeing the slaves in the United States? " asks the man
"No, in Iceland" the jumper replies
"THEN DIE, HERETIC!" The man replies, shoving the jumper to his death
>butthurt Icelandic jokes set in the 1800
U like?
Yes, I like woke truths about the Danes desu
I sadly don't have any more at the moment, stay woke friend.
What's the difference between a migratory bird and a southern Italian?
The bird goes north, prepares his nest, and then goes back south when it's cold.
The southern Italian goes north, does fuck all, and stays there.
I like this joke better with the Christian sects versions
I like this joke better when it was called palestine
what's the difference between a cat and a swede?
you brake when you see a cat in the road
What do you call 100 mexicans holding hands?
A spicket fence
>The Somali girl said: "I'm going to strip naked, so they'd think I'm the black box."
Black box is actually orange
A finn, a swede, a norwegian, an englishman and a chinese were sitting in a plane. After a while, the plane suffered damage and one of them had to jump out. The chinese jumped and shouted: "Long live freedom!"
The flight continued, until a malfunction wasy found in the plane's engine and one passenger had to jump again. This time the englishman jumped and shouted: "Long live the queen!"
The flight continued, until again a third one had to jump because of a leak in the fuel tank. The finn and norwegian looked at each other and threw the swede out of the plane while shouting: "Long live nordic co-operation!"
nice