Be at LCS with buddy

>be at LCS with buddy
>looking at the massive wall-spanning rack of new releases
>buddy and I making small talk while browsing New issues
>suddenly, buddy's face goes from content to extremely disturbed
>color drains from his face
>I ask him what's wrong
>an incoherent mumble is all he can respond with
>take a look at the comic he was skimming in his now weakening hands
>I instantly make out the white impact font on red background
>MARVEL
>my blood runs cold
>frantically, I pull the comic from my buddy's lifeless hands
>I'm deathly afraid but I just have to know
>bottom corner
>the six letters hit me like a moving train
>BENDIS
>blood spurts from my orifices as I lose consciousness
>wake up three weeks later in the hospital having fallen into a coma
>I ask if my buddy is okay
>doctor says he was taken upstate to an asylum after he paid five entire dollars for 25 pages
>mfw

My LCS has nothing but piles of Civil War 2 and shitty tie ins because nobody is buying them.

Meanwhile Rebirth titles sell out completely every week. It's hilarious how bad Marvel is these days. I feel bad for the artists forced to draw this shit nobody wants to read aside from speedreading delusional fanboys

The funniest thing here is that neither you nor any of your buddies would ever know what's wrong with Bendis, Slott, Austen, Millar, Liefeld, Land, Deodato etc if your stupid asses weren't bombardiered with compiled images and chin/blogposts about it. Think for your stupid ass self.

How do you know they didn't? Why are you so mad?

Memes are powerful things. Dozens of Dudes and Ladies from the Internet have made careers by telling viewers what to think of cartoons, comics, video games and other media.

Have you and your friends tried *not* reading Marvel? This seems like a 'tongue on a frozen flagpole' thing, an easy problem to avoid.

>Marvel apologist gets easily triggered by the truth

Must be a day ending in -y.

I hear Omega Men trade has been selling really well. This fills me with hope.

Shoo shoo company wars faggot

...

>Millar

His stuff always sells well.

>c-company wars
no one even mentioned DC though. Take your meds user

>doctor says he was taken upstate to an asylum after he paid five entire dollars for 25 pages
And I'll bet half of those pages were repeated panels.

Why would you come to a blatant company wars bait thread to defend your precious Marvel when the only retort you have is "go away company wars fag"? Is it because you have to be completely retarded to read Marvel these days?

Half the pages?

>I was only nine years old
>I loved Bendis so much, I owned all his comics and merchandise
>I pray to Bendis every night, thanking him for the dialogue I have been given
>"Bendis is love", I say, "Bendis is life"
>My dad hears me and calls me a faggot
>He is obviously jealous of my devotion to Bendis
>I respond "I'm a faggot?"
>He says "Yes, you're a faggot"
>I say "But I'm not gay"
>He says "I meant faggot as a generic insult, not to call you gay"
>I repond "It's still pretty homophobic"
>He punches me and sends me to my room
>I am crying now, because I wasn't finished talking
>I go into my bed and it is very cold
>I feel a warmth moving towards me
>I keep feeling a warmth moving towards me for 5 panels
>I feel something touch me
>2 page spread
>It's Bendis
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear, "Wanna read my latest comic?"
>"Your latest comic?"
>"Yes"
>"You came to my room to show me your latest comic?"
>"Why else would I come?"
>"I thought you were gonna have your way with me"
>"You're 9 years old, anyone who could possibly think that would be twisted freak"
>"A twisted freak?"
>"Yes"
>"Can I just read the comic?"
>"Go ahead"
>He grabs me with his chubby nerd hands and puts me on my hands and knees
>I'm ready
>I open the comic for Bendis
>He wasted several pages on characters eating and doing nothing
>It hurts so much, but I do it for Bendis
>I can feel my brain tearing as my eyes start to water
>I push against his force
>I want to please Bendis
>He laughs a mighty laugh as he ignores established continuity
>My dad walks in
>Bendis looks him deep in the eyes and says, "It's all over now"
>"Who the fuck are you? I'm calling the cops!"
>"You were suposed to say "It's over now?""
>"Fuck you, what are you doing with my son?"
>"You're no fun"
>Bendis punches the wall and leaves to write about his waifu some more
Bendis is love, Bendis is life

Dat salt doe

i was tempted to buy civil war 2 only because it was the number one and it looked nice

but then i saw the price and said fuck that maybe another day

True.

Look at how many people here praise absolute mediocrity that is Soule, Pak, Lemire, Percy or Abnett. Not to mention absolutely shit tier "artwork" of Sorrentino and Janin/Aco. Fucking Johns is an assault on any brain with an ability to think for longer than 2 seconds at a time.

Nobody here praises Souless, he's garbage and deserves a bullet to the head.

Lemire has turned in very good work in the past though.

...

I don't like this image because there's a lot of the same stupidity its making fun of in there, but it's sacriledge to point that out because "dude irony lmao"

For example?

Guess you weren't here for his stint on Thunderbolts, Swamp Thing and Red Lanterns

Yet to read Essex County and th rest of his early work but all of his capeshit was either derivative or straight up shit

Alias, Power and Daredevil are Bendis at his most Bendis.

Essex County is the only Lemire work that I really liked.

Sweet Tooth lost me and Underwater Welder was trash IMO.

You're defending Bendis, Austen, Land, Deodato and Liefeld so don't talk about quality.

There's practically no difference between Loeb's works all throughout his career except at some point he got a bit bitter cause of we all know what. You can read Long Halloween or you can read Hulk, it's the same nonsensical bullshit showcase of artist(s) and characters.

Miller's problem is that traditional cape fans are too thick-headed and canon/powerlevel-oriented to appreciate his later work, and ironic/satirical works only "count" when they are explicitly named in the indicia with "genre: satire"

Superior, like Huck and Jupiter Legacy etc are terrible mechanical writing but they get a pass because they're "not mean-spirited"

And so on

So you just admitted you entirely lack reading comprehension and critical analysis skills in general and really wouldn't know a piece of shit from an apple if you weren't told the difference.

Ok.

I can agree with Loeb, I'd say he's the weak point on there. Any other creator I can name at least 5 worthwhile works, but Loeb only has that and... COTU?

With Miller, you're so focused on explaining your theory of _why_ people don't like him that you're entirely missing the point. Do large amounts of Sup Forums hate him and tell people to stay away from him? Does he have works that are still worth reading? If yes, then he and his works belong on there.

What would you say are the mechanical problems of Superior?

No.