ABSOLUTE SHITE

ABSOLUTE SHITE

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i.4cdn.org/wsg/1501774560549.webm
youtube.com/watch?v=wK8kK4hY6PA
independent.co.uk/news/science/nasa-planetary-protection-earth-aliens-contaminate-space-moon-planet-mars-jupiter-salary-a7872066.html
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she is waifu tho

I agree. I wanted to walk out of the cinema during the first hour.

Made me want to rewatch Prometheus and pretend that Shaw survived and that Ridley had gone with his original idea of both Shaw and David arriving on the planet and meeting the other Engineers.

Fuck Daniels and the whole crew. I hate them so much

*clears throat*

>Made me want to rewatch Prometheus and pretend that Shaw
Her off-screen death and her eventual fate is absolutely disturbing and completely ruins any point of watching Prometheus (not that there was much point in the first place because it was shit too).

I couldn't delete this shit from my harddrive fast enough. The Alien franchise is forever ruined. We had two good films from more than 30 years ago now and that's it.

>people STILL think there is going to be a good Alien movie
that was 30 years ago, grow the fuck up already

get better waifus

absolute kino

>David didn't turn Shaw into an Xeno Queen to show her the ultimate love
Ridley can't even be do a good job at being a fucking hack
Don't let the bedbugs bit you though

women... am i right?

It was good but certain elements were neglected. They could have made Dr.Shaw's torture more impactive if he could see a snippet of her emotional reaction to the immense pain - to really get the horror across.

AND the engineer's society was the only reason we all watched this, right? We badly wanted to see what they had in mind and we got a whole 2 minutes of screen time. A severely neglected aspect!

Other than that the film was okay. The robot fight scenes were awesome, the alien lifeforms and their backstory was awesome, and the ending was great.

This needs to be set to music

The only result of something touched by Damon Lindelof (movie, episode and anything that follows up) is metastasis.
Better stop now.

I liked it.
SPARK torrent is out.

>the engineer's society was the only reason we all watched this, right?
Hyper advanced race of scientifically enlightened beings who potentially gave birth to all life in the universe.

Dressed in sack cloths.

>the alien lifeforms and their backstory was awesome
nigga wat? there was no alien backstory, just david making experiments with them.

One of my flatmates really liked it, thw other one and me couldn't stand how stupid the characters were.
>Sure, Mr. Roboto-who-obviously-is-involved-with-the-Alien, I will follow you down into that dark basement and put my face right on top of that totally harmless giant egg!

>Mr. Roboto-who-obviously-is-involved-with-the-Alien, I will follow you down into that dark basement and put my face right on top of that totally harmless giant egg!
Yeah I couldn't believe that bullshit. Anyone would have blown David's fucking head clean off his shoulders long before that. Everyone deserved to die because they were idiots. The movie was just fucking awful.

i thought he was gonna end up holding him up and David just reducing him and putting his head on top of the egg which was pretty predictable, but it was even worst

Did you read what I wrote? I want to pretend the original sequel to Prometheus was made and she didn't die off screen

>tfw I am imagining such an amazing movie in my head

"It's perfectly safe!"
"Oh, okay. You were creeping me out there for a minute."

>This needs to be set to music
Give me 10 mins and I'll do it

Here it is with music
i.4cdn.org/wsg/1501774560549.webm

Kek

>was expecting some SKA
>riff intensifies

Ya got me, 9/10

Nice

DUDE! LETS WALK ABOUT ON AN ALIEN PLANET WITH NO SPACE SUITS OR PROTECTIVE GEAR AT ALL. WHAT COULD GO WRONG? IT'S NOT LIKE WE HAVE A FUCKING ANDROID ON BOARD WHO WE COULD SEND DOWN ALONE TO SCOPE THE PLACE OUT AND MAKE SURE IT'S SAFE. DUDE!

youtube.com/watch?v=wK8kK4hY6PA

you rite

Why do people always say this? They KNEW the planet was suitable for human life based on the Covenant's readings. This is set in the far future, they didn't need to take any precautions. If any one of them had a helmet on when they walked out onto the terrain, I guarantee you they would have been made fun of.

I would have still sent the robot.

GUYS, HEY GUYS? DON'T COME DOWN HERE. JUST FOUND 100000 CORPSES OF A CIVILISATION. THEY WERE GENOCIDALLY KILLED BY THIS OTHER ROBOT I MET. HE'S BEEN DOING WEIRD GENETIC EXPERIMENTS AND ACTING ALL SHIFTY. HE ALSO LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE ME SO WHATEVER YOU DON'T COME DOWN. 'KAY GUYS?

>they didn't need to take any precautions
why not?

pottery

Aliens > Alien > Alien 3 > Covenant > Resurrection > Prometheus

>I would have still sent the robot.
"Hey guys' don't c...." *interference* "Ahem, come down guys it's fine. Everything's fine."
"Walker, is that you?"
"N.. I mean yes. This is definitely Walker. My hair just got really long. Isn't that weird? Anyway, everything's fine, come on down."

This would've made the movie more enjoyable.

I know, what's with the kiss between the 2 Michaels? Was that gay or just self loving?

Giant fucking letdown

If you met another version of you wouldn't you fuck you?

I'd at least give me a blowjob.

No, I would rape someone and make them catch him instead though

Yeah but Daniels was hot though.

Just because you can breath the fucking air doesn't mean that the vegetation that has evolved independent from human life won't give you the worst case of terminal hay fever you've ever seen. WE ARE ONLY ADAPTED FOR LIFE ON EARTH AND ALL OTHER POSSIBLE PLANETS WITH LIFE ARE BASICALLY STARTING FROM SCRATCH.

We're still dropping like flies due to diseases & parasites and we fucking evolved on this planet along side them. Imagine how terrible it would be if we hadn't. Death. Swift. Unavoidable. Death.

Aliens > Alien > Resurrection > Alien 3 > Prometheus > Covenant

Fight me

kek

This poster makes me sad. Could have been great, instead we got alien: gay robot with daddy issues in space.

Actually this. Of course this where all science fiction falls apart. If the gravity was only fractionally different to earth, we would fall over and maybe even have heart problems or difficulty breathing. And the microbiology of an alien world would run riot on us. Humans are inheritantly ties to the planet Earth - it's our life-support system. We'll never leave this world the way we are now.

alien = aliens > prometheus > 3 > 4 > covenant

By your logic the Covenant scanners should classify Earth as uninhabitable.

This is actually so wrong it is silly.

fractionally different to earth will not cause us to stop breathing or have heart attacks. anything from .3->1.2 shows no signs of issue.

Also, since our immune system removes anything that isn't close to what we have, a alien life forms would be quickly removed from our bodies - the only health risks from virus, bacteria, fungi, and so on are if it produces a toxin or causes such a strong immune response that our own immune system kills off good cells too.

The "Alien germs kills us" makes great storylines but is not much based on facts. We don't think about it since it a Trope that is as old as "War of the Worlds" when the real worry would be invasive species.

>We're still dropping like flies due to diseases & parasites and we fucking evolved on this planet along side them. Imagine how terrible it would be if we hadn't.
Most likely we wouldn't have any issue as they would be so alien that our immune system would reject them outright as soon as they enter the body.

New illnesses come from stuff that is biologically close to us (Mammals mostly, sometimes Avians). It not like we are going to get infected by something that infects say, tobacco plants or oak trees.

Please somebody put comedy sound effects on this

You're talking about a completely controlled environment on a space craft or space station.

On an actual alien world would be a whole different story. We've had the technology to travel to Mars for decades but we've never done it. NASA will cite budget reasons but the truth is they is the know it would be probably be suicide.

>Walker
This is what happens when you watch shitty cam rips.

Was Life, an Alien knockoff, better than an Alien film made by the creator of Alien?

>We've had the technology to travel to Mars for decades

A ONE-WAY trip, at best. So yeah, it would be suicide. NASA fucking comes out and say that, because we don't have the technology for a return trip unless we're throwing the world's resources at it.

According to Kermode, yes.

No, I am talking a active biosphere. Alien species will be so alien the chances that they have the ability to infect us is remote. As in a billion to 1 odds

NASA budget is under 20 billion dollars. A mission to mars (2 way) would cost about 100-250 billion dollars with current technology. Far less then say, the F-35 program, but how can you justify a mission to mars at say, 175 billion dollars?

one way is a lot cheaper, but no one was to okay it as it a long commitment to sending rockets every few months for some resupplies.

If you said "Mars by 2035" and commit 200 billion dollars to it, we could do it. But why in the fuck would we spend 200 billion on it?

Alien > Aliens > Alien 3 assembly cut > Prometheus > Covenant > Resurrection

very much so. I had a better time with Life then these last two "Alien" films.

>World resources
>200 billion dollars

That what, 10 fighter jets?

Kermode is building rage every time Scott gets closer to utterly fucking up the intrigue of Alien, if nothing else we can expect some kino rants

>we could do it. But why in the fuck would we spend 200 billion on it?
It's kind of depressing. Escaping the inevitable death of your own world - and ensuring the your knowledge of your species lives on - should be the ultimate goal of any scientifically enlightened race of beings.

Bitching about money shows how fucked we are but I hold fast the idea that sending a human to Mars and ultimately dying (either in transit or on the planet itself) would be a catastrophic blow to our psyche.

I honestly think we're stuck here. We're tied to this planet. We ultimately give birth to a new form of life like AI or we may begin to engineer ourselves biomechanically and then leave this planet, but the 'human race', as we think of ourselves now, will die here on Earth.

NASA is actually now recruiting to find someone to protect us from Aliens. I ain't even kidding.

independent.co.uk/news/science/nasa-planetary-protection-earth-aliens-contaminate-space-moon-planet-mars-jupiter-salary-a7872066.html

>Escaping the inevitable death of your own world

That won't happen by getting your ass to mars, though. You'll just die out a couple of months after Earth's governments descend into chaos.

I was thinking more about the long term picture. Even if we something the survive ecological or environmental environmental degredation of our planet, the whole solar system will eventually one day be fucked when the sun burns its fuel out and kills everything. You'd like to think we'd have our shit together and be hell and gone long before then.

I honestly don't understand what the problem is supposed to be with this movie. It might be a bit slow, but at least it's way less stupid than Prometheus. Sure you could question their naive approach in general and absolute lack of contamination security protocols. But other than that the story is believable enough for a horror movie and the acting fine.

Maybe it was not scary enough for an Alien movie? I can't really tell such things anymore and I'm usually not interested in horror movies.

HAHAHAHAH better than alien HAHAHAHA

The scientists weren't that dumb, but the creature was a joke, that shit teleported around the ship at the end i thought it was a venom movie trailer prequel of how he got into Earth

Yes and no.

If you have six people there, yes, of course.
get 100k people and mining the belt for resources Mars could easily live past earth.

Thing is, that there no drive to do so outside of exploration, and the commercial aspect knows they would be taxed to oblivion if they tried to collect space minerals.

One way to mars actually makes more sense, it much cheaper and mars has enough gravity and resources to at least survive with only a few key imports.

>Dude let's not wear helmets lmao
>Dude let's live on this planet covered in hurricanes lmao
>Dude there was a huge city out in the open we didn't detect lmao

Why does everyone who has seen the Alien franchise seem to be a shitposting retard?