THE DARK TOWER Ending

Roland kills the Man in Black, announces that the Dark Tower is finally safe, adopts Jake and moves to moder-day Manhattan. Movie ends with them having hot dogs, which Roland hilariously thinks are made from genuine dog and wonders which breed they were made from.

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hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/dark-tower-tv-series-sets-walking-dead-grad-as-showrunner-1026382
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Wasn't gonna watch this jew propaganda anyways t b h

Bravo, Sony!

Wait, is this actually another Sony movie?

Fucking kek why did ANYONE think this wasn't going to be total fucking garbage?

is this true or is OP just meming? it's a sony movie, so i can't tell the difference.

Is this real?

>everything in that spoiler

It's real.

Forgot to mention that Jake worgs into Idris Elba and helps him recite a mantra to save the day for peace and love.

Oh and lets not forget Elba kills all the kids on the other side of the portal

>Roland kills the Man in Black, announces that the Dark Tower is finally safe
u fuckin wot m8 r u fuckin gigglin sware me mam imma giv u such a slap for tellin lies

Holy fuck Matthew mcconaughey has nicely manicured nails in that picture. Jesus mother of Christ.

But the man in black isn't the main villain, he's just the crimson kings henchman.

I kinda heard Sony wants to build cinematic universe on its material. But they finished off the momentum.... Totally???????

fuckfuckfuckfcukfcufkfcufkfcfuckfuckfuckfuckfukcufkcufkcu

I'm not even surprised though

Amazing

Did they make sure the villain is white?

how many of the books will be in this movie?

DELET THIS

Absolutely, Jean Claude Van Senpai. They should have called the movie The White Genocide Tower, because that's what this movie literally is -- White Genocide. The j-ws can't resist demonizing White Men and shoving huge nigger phalluses (dicks for you low iq niggers out there) in our faces.

I don't even think they mention the Crimson King in this movie apart from a little easter egg thing

This can't be real

Well, it's not like the ending to this could make me angrier than the ending to the books so I don't know what to feel right now.

Based. Fuck these Hollywood kikes.

I wonder if smashing my face into a deli meat slicer would kill me

Sony was involved in the making of the movie, user.

>Literally all they had to do was a scene for scene adaption of the first book

The North Koreans need to nuke Hollywood, there is no redemption for that shithole.

This is some meta bait

This, holy shit. What the fuck were they thinking?!

I figured this is what they would do too, but in a way I'm glad they didnt now. This fanfic trash is perfect for black Roland.

No baiting here. I've been nofap for three days.

no way dude lol

This. The only real budget money would've gone to the flashback in Gilead. They could've even done a surprise twist where Roland saves Jake and nails down we've been watching a sequel the whole time if they wanted to go that route.

This shit was easy mode.

Of course, and its considered the worst job Matt's done in years.

THEY MADE A WORSE ENDING THAN BOOK 7

HOW

I mean yeah its retarded but what exactly makes it so bad?

How does the book end?

>Jean Claude Van Senpai

all of roland's friends are either dead or in a another universe

he kills the crimson king by having some retard from another novel use his power of literally erasing things from things from existence with his eraser (this character is introduced at the very end of the last book out of nowhere).

roland climbs the tower and at the top he learns he failed his quest because he doesnt have some horn that was mentioned once in a random flashback in the fifth book

roland wakes up at the beginning of the first book and we learn roland has made this loops hundreds of times before and always failed.

except now he has a the horn, idris elba has this horn

That's full blown retarded

It's really not as bad as people make it out to be.
Essentially what happens is it's revealed that it's not the first time Roland has made it to the tower. Each time he did, he had a different object he placed in it, then the time loop would start over again. It's an interesting concept that just got implemented poorly.

This was never going to be good so I'm glad it's going to be an entertaining dumpster fire instead.

I remember being so mad when I finished reading the series, fuck.

didn't roland become the man in black
so essentially he's chasing himself?

The crimson king fights roland with exploding sneetches from harry harry potter. klng points out these sneetches are from the harry potter universe and even writes it on a crate so the characters know

It really is the best possible scenario. No one will ever care about this nor will black Roland be tried again when someone else inevitably tries to unfuck DT ten years from now.

that sounds like bullshit, but I believe it

no he didnt become the man in black

but the movie implies he did become a black man

Carlos!!

To be fair King did put a disclaimer in the book that if we wanted a happy ending, to stop reading there.

ive seen increasing amounts of embarrassing false flags like this over the last week

...

I think the idea of the loop was cool and felt like an idea from the first book, most of last book was retarded though

Its even worse than I thought it'd be

>Each time he did, he had a different object he placed in it
That's not quite how it works. Each time he gets there he has lost the horn of eld along the way. He needs the horn to win, so he ends up back in the loop, to try and reach the tower with the horn.
Obviously he doesn't know he needs the horn.

That's why people got a little interested when promo shots showed him with the horn this time.

This. The loop opened a shitload of possibilities. If Roland ended up saving Jake, Mordred would never have been born, Roland would've had all of his fingers, and that Roland/O'Dimm showdown could've happened at the base of the tower.
King left the series unfinished.

Yeah, you could tell the last book was just King trying to get the series over with.

Sony was a mistake

If you pay a single red cent to watch this shit, you have forgotten the face of your father

A Stephen King movie with a terrible ending?

Wow that's fucking trash. This is King's magnum opus? Even The Shining it's better

You kidding me? I'm actually excited for this shitshow now

Definitely. It started going to shit badly after book four and by the time you got to seven King was just throwing paint at the canvas to see what stuck and sadly one of those things was writing his own dumb ass into the novel

>CIA nigger false flag
go glow in the dark in some other thread

somebody get this hot head outta here

A terrible ending, a terrible middle, and a terrible beginning.

In fairness The Gunslinger was baller fiction, specifically the original cut before he went back and added shit.

There's a reason the Dark Tower books got so popular in the first place. The beginning was actually great reading

>Literally all they had to do was a scene for scene adaption of the first book
That's not a movie you could ever make. You'd have to go to tv for that level of nuance.

What a day to be alive.

>They could've even done a surprise twist where Roland saves Jake
That would piss me off as much as the OP's scenario. And wouldn't be a twist for 995% of the audience anyway.

Most of it yes but the recursive ending in the epilogue that Stephen King says is shit and you shouldn't read is actually pretty awesome. Otherwise almost all of the last two books are trash.

Really only the Gunslinger was truly great. It's not a fantastic series.

You forgot that the Crimson king literally goes

>REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

The entire fight.

Damn dude that's crazy shit, be careful wit that out there btuh

>DUH ENDING

>REEEEEEEEEE FUCKING GUNSLINGERS

>Death, but not for you, gunslinger. Never for you.

>This is King's magnum opus?
Only King thinks that. Everyone else agrees it's The Stand.

There won't be a sequel. MIB is the main villian.

This. The Stand is head and shoulders above everything else he's written.

You mean Eyes of the Dragon, pleb

Never has an image fit so perfectly

Why? The consequences of that decision would change all kinds of shit. Susannah would stay mentally fucked, but wouldn't be pregnant with Mordred. Roland's search for the Man in Black would be harder and lead to more shit to get into. Mordred, not being born, would never shit all over book 7 by killing the Man in Black. Hell, as a thread saving Jake has potential, and Jake ended up coming back anyway. It wouldn't have undone the first book either. In fact it would show that the events of the first seven books influenced his looped decisions, like taking the horn with him instead of leaving it behind at Jericho.

>Eyes of the Dragon
Harry Potter tier

Still had a terrible ending. Only good endings King can do aren't endings at all.

>Why?
It's THE character defining moment for Roland.

As have I. These anti-white, jewish, nu-male cuck shills are real desperate. I wonder why? Is it because we're waking people up to their satanic system, exposing the baby raping cannibals in the democratic party, destroying cultural marxism (read: judaism), dismantling safe spaces, and making America great again? Of course it is. WE ARE WINNING. The Overton Window has shifted. White Genocide has been canceled. The shills can't handle that fact, and by god are they desperate, desperate like a non-based fag in a bathhouse. They can't handle the power of kek and his prophet God-Emperor Trump. Feels damn good, boys. Feels damn good.

If there are any cucks reading this, I have a little advice for you: man up, clean your room, and read The Art of the Deal. It's not yet too late for you, but the hour is close at hand.

Read the entire post. Roland's character had changed over the course of the book series. That's why he had the horn when it looped when he didn't give a shit about it last time around.

Wait, so this isn't a sequel to the novels then? I thought this was supposed to be the loop when Roland finally got things right, not some literal fanfiction.

Sony is apparently still thinking about making this a tv series, with Idris Elba reprising his role of course:

hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/dark-tower-tv-series-sets-walking-dead-grad-as-showrunner-1026382

Something tells me those plans will be shelved with what looks like a total fiasco at the box office.

>Read the entire post.
I did. I don't care. I don't like the "It's a sequel but character is a generic good guy now so he earns his happy ending" bullshit.

>Roland's character had changed over the course of the book series
Only because King hated writing the character he created and turned into a hack. The development was completely unbelievable, forced, and ruined the tone.

Only one way to find out.

>McConaughey is a fucking flawless, perfect cast as Man in Black
>make Roland - a man described as a Clint Eastwood doppelganger with steely blue eyes - a nigger instead of just aging up Neal Mcdonough a bit
>give them seven fucking books worth of material crushed into an 88 minute soundbyte.
>be astonished when it loses money like a cokehead with a gambling problem

Don't pretend Dark Tower wasn't shlock just because you happened to like it. Dark Tower turned into power of friendship shlock as early as book 3. Maybe as early as book 2.

>The development was completely unbelievable, forced, and ruined the tone.

And it's official canon. Should've backed a better horse buddy

I wanted it to fail for casting a nigger as Roland, now I am happy.

I expected this post, but was beginning to worry it wouldn't come.
Thank you, user.

>Move to modern day Manhattan
No, they move to Mid-World.

>announces that the Dark Tower is finally safe

what the fuck

Reminder that Viggo Mortensen was first slated to be the Gunslinger Roland Deschain, but due to him speaking out about Israel's occupation of Palestine he was blacklisted by (((Hollywood))), the Dark Tower project was later dropped by Universal Pictures and subsequently picked up by Sony Pictures in 2015, which in turn cast Idris Elba in the role.

He would've been amazing.

Not in this shit movie.

What's Derrick Zoolander doing in OP's pic?

The Stand is a good character study, but the ending is shit even by King's standards.

his Opus is It.