I recently got shut down by a woman that I share a lot of interests in, even a sexual fetish, and after being denied a date, beyond dissapointment, I feel this urge not to talk to her anymore, like, whats the point? She's eventually going to find someone and our interactions are going to come to a screeching halt anyway, why bother investing anymore time?
Has anyone else be afflicted with this kind of perdicament? How should I handle it?
Pic not related
Do you bother putting any time into anything without a future? If so youre failing at life.
I do, but either women I'm not interested in sexually or women that are friends of my girlfriend or girlfriends of my male friends or social acquaintances.
Like, in your situation I would just cut the cord.
If you're interested in a woman, and you're both single and technically available, and you ask her out and she says no?
Ditch and ignore.
If this was a case of some girl in your social circle that you thought you might want to fool around with and she says no, you can just go back to being normal friends.
But if it's a girl you were getting to know, you just stop getting to know her and move on.
if you're not good a being friends with people as people, you're probably going to have shit relationships with people who are women who you will be using essentially for sex and to fill a gender role in dual gender relationship
this is the basis of why most marriage fail -- people can't see the person through the gender -- they "fall in love" with someone they would otherwise despise, or they can only feel motivation by sexual characteristics, which are, essentially, in half the population
Yes, I have platonic female friends. They have other female friends who I occassionally fuck. They too have female friends, who are possible future fucks.
Make as many female friends as possible, it opens up more potential fucks than male friends do.
You fucking retred.
op, tell us more about your relationship
This is an inherent subconscious fear of mine, thinking with my dick instead of my brain.
I find her to be an enjoyable person to talk to and have fun with, but it just feels strange and even desensitizing to just cut someone loose just because they have no interest in a relationship outside of just hanging out, which only get exacerbated when another person she does have interest in comes into the fray.
I always found it hard to be friends with girls because I'm obviously used to being friends with guys. So I want to treat them like guys, but they take everything personally. You have to walk on egg shells. You basically have to do nice chats and you might reach a point where you can do mild friendly insults, but you can never call her a pig fucker. There just no point. You can't be friends with them because you have to act like someone you're not around them. It's like keeping them around just to say you have female friends. Totally pointless.
>but dude all that pussy
Grow up.
OP just don't talk to the bitch anymore. Don't invest any more time. She rejected you so don't become a beta orbiter. Don't become the guy who buys her lunch and waters her plants while she's out fucking someone else.
I once banged one. Was weird afterwards
You sound like no better than the skags, desu m8.
We met online, on a fetish forum, and have hung out pretty solidly for the past couple weeks, had fun talking about interests, our mutually held fetish, and I recently asked her out on an actual date which she declined. Like I may or may not have conveyed, I like her as a person and having someone to confide in concerning my fetish, but after getting shut down, my interest levels completely flatlined and Im curious if this is supposed to be normal behavior? Cutting her loose just seems like a dick move, but it seems like the only reasonable option at this juncture.
>You fucking retred.
You where actually pretty close to come of as "cool".
>We met online, on a fetish forum,
What's your kink?
Also, you do know there are no girls on the internet?
user you're having a very common reaction, in fact women often complain that men stop talking to them when they realise they wont get sex.
If she actually had an interesting personality you wouldn't even think about dropping her.
Women on a fetish forum will be doing two things: Collecting male friends, and finding a rich handsome guy with his shit together to fund her life.
When gay men meet other men, they logically feel as though them having a mutual fetish means that they'll have great sexual chemistry together because sex is fun. It makes sense, right?
It's more complicated with women. We aren't trying to sexually get off all the time. We need to look up to a man to truly get off sexually, especially if it's in some sort of dom/sub relationship.
Women can, and will mold their sexual fetishes to attract the most men in order to find their ideal alpha mate.
What is your fetish, if I may ask?
Body inflation. Im not one of those people who actual inflates their bowels with aquarium pumps and the like, I think those people are taking things a little too far, but I do enjoy the feeling an inflatable latex suit or inflating a beachball under stretchy clothing. Mostly, its the sensation of pressure, awkwardness of mobility, lack of control that I find attractive about it. Not exactly the most common fetish though.
You're missing the point of the "no women on the internet" meme though lad, it means the fact that they have tits and a vagina doesnt hold sway while here because chances are, youre never going to see then or feel that vagina or boobs.
Pic related, some of my fetish fuel.
>Body inflation.
That's an interesting one.
My estimation of you has gone up.
Though, she actually kind of does. She's a successful CFO for a logistics company, keeps herself relatively fit, writes stories that are akin to our fetish that I think are pretty decent, knows a thing or two about guns and how to use them, and likes to race her Porsche on a local track from time to time. Shes a bit of a dork when it comes to superhero cape shit, but she does seem like a nice person, though this is why Im having this conundrum of whether or not to just cut her off completely or try to maintain some sort of friendship, which feels bitter even just thinking about it. Probably the reason Im going to go with the former option, even though it sounds like its going to suck for a while.
Sounds like you have the right idea. Move on, date someone else when you're ready and forget her.
No. Women are shit friends on the whole. For example, a group of male friends will spend the night with a hobby (watching the game, playing board games, etc) and will discuss politics, religion, sciences, local happenings, and other such topics. Women will frequently go to such events and either try to make themselves the center of attention, contribute poorly while never trying to improve, or "watch" while still drawing attention to themselves or staring like a specter. When the usual male topics of conversation come up, most men can disagree with each other but still consider each other friends, women instead are looking for a fight and try to convince others to remove someone from their group. Or they will talk shit about people all night (something men never really do).
Women are shit friends for men on the whole. Don't fall for their bullshit.
I could say the same shit that women do normie men do.
>and will discuss politics, religion, sciences, local happenings, and other such topics.
topkek. more like vidya, latest hipster garbage, and DUDE WEED for 90% of men.
I am not saying women are any better, but having friends worth talking to is about finding the rare few people you can tolerate and have enough in common with to have good interactions with.
Hey, it's Tom Preston everyone!
You should keep it cool for a couple of months gradually depleting the amount of time you spend with her, pretend to have an amusing life, if you can acquire a gf as a smoke screen. Then, if she shows initiative you should invite her to someplace where you can have the opportunity to talk and drink alcohol, after that try to get her to go into your place, there make an all out attack(be firm and persuasive, but not rapey) and either you will have sex or she will leave you forever, either way you tried.
I'm curious as to what would have been less enticing to hear.
He's right you know. Most men aren't that much better than women, they talk about the same asinine bullshit that women talk about, just different subject matter. It msotly happens when males gather in groups, Ive noticed. You corner one of them and you can generally have a reasonable disscusion about anything over a beer. Get a few other guys in on it and too many variables and points of view come into the fray and it all goes to shit. I thankfully have a few of these close friends that I can have these discussions with, though now that I think about it, I much doubt these kinds of discussions would be had with woman in question simply because we've talked for weeksand havent discussed one thing outside of each other.
While I'm surprised that you know who that is, believe me, he's regarded as just as much of a faggot in the inflation community as he is anywhere else.
no, i dont have any friends at all
>implying we want you to actually know what we're talking about
We literally put muzzles on ourselves around women, just like women do around men. Except were not utterly naive like you are apparently
Where are my tits btw
I am still very good friends with my ex's friends even though we broke up several years ago. I have had many opportunities to date a couple of them but I feel like it'd just make shit awkward.
Don't try to be friends with someone you were only initially attracted to physically/romantically. You won't get over her if she's always hanging around.
Everyone knows that.
t. Sup Forums
take this advice young op fagget
Ohh baby, a triple.
Im a guy, dude, the OP. Doesn't change my opinion though, being that I am one, I know how we think and fuction. I just try to steo back from it all and be the observer when I can.
I can post tits though, if you dont mind a forest of hair.
>I'm curious as to what would have been less enticing to hear.
A vanilla fetish; a socially acceptable peccadillo.
I've never encountered an inflation fetishist before. You're my first.
I doff my cap.
be honest to yourself about what you want. you wont waste your time with things you don't want.
manage your time. do you work? do you have things that you like doing alone? if you have time for those things but you also like hanging out with friends, what difference does it make whether its your bro or a woman? if you're only looking for sex and she isn't interested, you can still be friends with her, but you shouldn't spend your time trying to have sex with that person.
Meh, it is what it is. Its more fantasy based and not physically possible, but thats part of the fun to me, creating the illusion of the fantasy. It is a fairly rare fetish, Ill say that. Nowhere near as obscure as that one dude that jerks off to floor tiles, but not nearly as common as BDSM.
Also, not to mention, its a fetish mostly held by men, or men pretending to women, so finding an actual woman that also shares the fetish in the flesh is like the sighting of a White Elk or something.
I wouldn't call her a friend as such, just someone I watch gloriously burn her life down.
She's the stereotypical modern woman. In a "relationship" with a rich older guy that she just doesn't know why he won't commit, meanwhile sleeping with five guys every time they fight, and they constantly do because she's a strong modern woman who don't need no man, except when that man needs to buy her clothes for thousands of Euros.
Her life provides me with endless amusement.
As of recently, Ive quit smoking weed and starting working towards bettering myself and my position in life. I'm 27 and feel like I've wasted an incredible amount of time getting high and living on cheap thrills. However, perspective gained, Ive realized a few things that I want:
A better job, which Ive already started getting the works going on being an electricians apprentice.
Getting in shape, so I joined a gym, though Ive blown that off to hang out with this woman, so Ive fallen out of my routine
Finding someone who accepts me, for me and is willing to indulge me in my fantasies. This is frankly my biggest hurdle I feel, but its what I want. While it may sound kind of insane, my fetish is a part of my sexual identity at this point, and not having a partner willing to satisfy these fantasies isnt going to work out. I've contemplated trying to rid myself of it, but at that point, I ask, whats so wrong about it? Sure, its goofy as fuck, but its what I like and I would feel like if a woman were willing to indulge my tastes, Id gladly do the same for her within reason.
My biggest hang up though, I suppose is wome in general, I do not hold a very high opinion of them. One of my friends and few of my coworkers call me misogynistic because I think of them as vapid, untrustworthy, and easily swayed by their emotions. However, they never take into account that I don't have a very high opinion of human beings in general and the only difference between the men and women as a whole in this context is that I dont want to fuck men, simple as that.
I used to think I wanted a family and two kids, like my parents, with someone I love. Unfortunately, the future that I see is cloudy at best. Possible success, if I manage to become an electrician, but I feel like my will to achieve will slowly fade without any sort of goal outside of achieving material possessions like a home, guns, or other nice things.
Being friends with the opposite sex is degenerate. It's haram for a reason.
Close, but not quite.
While she does seem like a "modern woman", she also does pretty well for herself on her own. She drives a Porsche, owns her own home, and is the CFO of a logistics firm, so I don't think the money is the issue. I think more so the issue, is that she isn't willing to make plans with anyone so not have to move around any plans that she has made for herself. Its a rather selfish and lonely way to live IMO, but that's her perrogative at this point.
I see a lot of my sister in her, very career orientated, but at least my fat ass sister can hold down a relationship, even though the guy is considered a "trade down" in financial status.
Pretty much this.
The girls I'm friends with are people I've know since I was a kid, friends of my wife, or friends wifes/gfs. I don't go out of my way to make friends with women, but you just end up with some by living life.
this
Though, wouldn't you want your partner to also be your friend? My parents have been married for almost 35-40 years claim that they are each others best friends. While that may sound like bullshit, seeing who they hang out with and what they talk about while with other people, I could easily see that to be the truth, and who wouldn't want to their partner also to be their best friend?
This sounds a lot like rationalising being a beta bitch.
If she shot you down, she considers you fugly genetic trash. Do you really want to stay friends with someone who has no respect for you?
Go with your initial instincts. She's not worth the time, and if you keep hanging out with her (a) she'll think you're a creep, and (b) you'll just feel worse as "that cool chick you know" fucks a series of Jamals right in front of you (figuratively. I hope)
I have been genuinely friend with a girl in my uni, we're in the same course of civil engineering.
Now, since i've been working in buiding since i was 14 i have a lot of experience compared to her and most people in my course, I always helped her and never asked anything in exchange. She's a 7.5/10 but I never had any interest in her (i have a girlfriend), and shes actually fun and can handle banters really well.
Last semester we ended up together in one course, "ergotechnic and BIM management". I have loads of experience in that and literally babysitted her during the entire duration of it. Meanwhile for work reasons i couldnt attend the lessons of another course, Rational Mechanics, while she did.
One week before the exam i politely asked her if she could give me her notes.
She fucking refused, saying that i didnt deserve her notes because i never showed up at lessons.
I thought she wasnt this retarded. Goddamn its just fucking notes, i didnt ask for anal sex ffs
Well, that was kind of the whole reason I brought up the dicussion in the first place man. It doesn't sound like youre too keen to the idea of having platonic friends yourself, which I can respect because I don't have any. You're right though, Im done with her, there's no point in even continuing to act like I care, nothing will ever come about from any of it except dissapointment.
No. It's a waste. I've tried but we usually end up fucking. Plus women suck at rational, intelligent conversation, aren't funny & do boring shit.
>i didnt ask for anal sex ffs
that's your mistake luigi
maybe that's what you should have asked for in the beginning.
then, notes, of course.
Are you fucking serious?
From the sounds of it, Worst Korea has the right idea. Chances are, she may have wanted your dick for sometime and that's just her getting you back because you didn't notice her senpai.
i know her boyfriend, not the smartest guy ever but hes chill, hanged out with him a couple of times too.
why shouldnt I?
That response actually made me sad. For three years i've been hanging out with her and she just treated me like that.
She has a strong attitude but so do I and whenever she got mad at me i'd just ignore her or tell her to calm down or stfu. Thats why i was the only male friend she managed to keep i guess.
Oh yeah dude, it sounds like this woman wanted your dick BADLY and is pissed that you went with another woman and probably isn't completely satisfied with whathisface that she ended up shacking up with. What other reason would she have for acting cunty?
well, youre "friends" so you can call her on her BS.
and say, i clearly helped you with that other subject, (or babyshart, like you said) there is no reason for you to be that cunty over me asking for notes.
yup i called her a cunt right after, didnt talk to her since. It was a month ago.
One other girl in my course said she actually did like me during first year but i already had a gf.
I was tempted, once we talked about sex and she told me that she wanted do get "taken" and pinned against a wall and fucked for hours, but none of her previous bfs did that. Got a boner for 2 hours.
I actually talked to her about how i sexed my gf to get hints on how to do better.