>be me at a BBQ
>guy who I haven't seen since I was like 30 says hi to me
>didn't remember him at first but realized that he was my cousin's bf when I saw him last
>start talking to him about what we're up to in life
>say I just finished my first year of college
>tells me he wants to be a chef and get his own food truck
>seems really excited about it
>tells me he'll be the one at the grill for the BBQ
>wait a while until the first round of burgers is ready
>get one
>it tastes dry and too salty
>guy asks me how the burger was
>"It was a little too spicy. Not like hot spicy but too much flavor"
>realize how I'm fucking up
>"...but that's just me though. I don't know"
>phew, what a save
>later hear him call at someone
>think he was talking to me and turn around
>"No, not you"
>goes up to other guy
>"You like the burgers?"
>"Yea, it's good"
>"Not too spicy?"
>"No, it's fine"
>realize I should've just said the same thing
I went back for another burger in good faith but it turns out he burnt the next round. I took one of the less burnt ones and ate the whole thing to hopefully show him that I didn't mind his grilling. He probably hated me.
ITT: Times when you acted like Curb Larry David
Other urls found in this thread:
>be alive
>hair starts falling out
>curb_theme_music.opus
Oh this story again.
You should hate him and be proud of it
>haven't seen him since you were 30
>just finished your first year of college
How fucking old are you
>literally stealing my true story/past thread word for word
For what reason, OP?
third time i seen this the past couple weeks. OP is a faggot
>avoid calling people ever
>just write mails
>mute mobile at all times every time
I FUCKING HATE PHONES
Get a life and maybe you won't be on Sup Forums so often that you see threads multiple times, shut-in losers.
>posting the same thread over and over is okay
Fuck off
If you weren't such a fucking loser with no life you wouldn't even know that the thread was posted more than once.
>two people I knew died in relatively close time
>friends of friends, not really close with either of them
>still go for moral support
>awkward as hell because everyone around me is crying and im just sitting there
>"omg, what did you like most about eric"
>uhh...he really could bring the room together
>legitimately said that, not even thinking it through
>small town, one funeral home, they had both wakes one day after another
>on the second day, we're leaving and I see the same ushers that I had just seen 24 hours before outside
>"will you be joining us again this evening"
>assume he's being a smart ass, I chuckle and say "no we're leaving for good this time"
>get out to the car
>friend turns to me and says "you know he was asking if we were coming to the brunch the family put together later that afternoon? because you just laughed in his face and said no"
>youtube.com
on the plus side I got my friend to laugh for the first time in weeks
>paying humans versus zombies in college
>im one of the last humans
>very paranoid, carrying 3 nerf guns on me at all times
>just talked to a friend who was a zombie in the cafeteria
>the rule is no shootouts in places like that or the library
>hear fast footsteps behind me, think im about to be ambushed because hes a sneaky cunt like that
>turn around, gun in hand to a pretty cute arabic girl in a hijab
>we both chuckle, and I say sorry I just thought I was about to be shot
>she gives me the dirtiest look and walks off
>it doesnt hit me why until a few hours later
>
If you weren't such a fucking loser with no life you wouldn't be posting the same pathetic greentext story over and over to get validation/attention from strangers.
For
Too late, you look like a retard.
For
Too late, you look stupid.
thats pretty funny user
this is some twisted levels of projection
Or maybe you should get a life.
>>assume he's being a smart ass, I chuckle and say "no we're leaving for good this time"
I don't get it.
Its not a brunch if its in the afternoon. Thats a linner
That's a bingo!
>be government spook
>discover a giant robot has landed in America and is destroying the military forces sent to stop it
>remind commanding officer of nuclear equipped submarine at our disposal
>plan to lure the giant to a remote location and nuke it
>hippy beatnik tells commanding officer giant is harmless and just attack because we are attacking it
>grab radio and tell sub captain to launch missile
>officer informs me that the missile is locked to the giant's current position
>asks me where the giant is
>humans versus zombies
>in college
what?
joke's on you, I'm a bot programmed to point out copypasta threads.
>14. The use of scrapers, bots, or other automated posting or downloading scripts is prohibited. Users may also not post from proxies, VPNs, or Tor exit nodes.
Not the smartest thing to make a joke about.
not him, but he stated that he was a bot.
Being a bot isn't against the rules, right?
user thought he was saying "so what are you coming back ANOTHER time" but he was really asking if he was returning later for another event, to which he laughed and said no
it happens, especially with freshman. By the time you are a senior youre so over everything nothing is fun anymore. We used to play with balled up socks because apparently a neon green toy is too intimidating
>tfw I pet several pairs of socks from my female classmates and fapped to them
were the socks good looking?
yeah, gym socks, plain socks, those little half socks girls wear with flats
>awkward as hell because everyone around me is crying and im just sitting there
all funerals for me, even close family
>tfw little girl relative looking around at church notices you and stares for a while then talks to her mother and she turns around at looks at you and gives a disgusted look
why me
>didnt shed a tear during my grandfathers funeral
>felt numb the entire time
>go for a walk with my dog a few weeks after
>break down out of nowhere and lose it
>still feel guilt for being a statue during his actual funeral
D-did you keep them?
It takes a while before it hits, nothing to be ashamed of. My grandmother died a month ago, and leading up to the funeral it didn't really hit me, I hadn't seen her in a year or so. But on the actual funeral I started bawling like a motherfucker. But I didn't cry at all at my other grandmothers funeral, it's weird shit.
What program uses the file extension .opus?
Hup.
Yup.
I think it only happens when it is someone you're truly close to.
Wow, are you going to let call you a loser?