Last 2 books were close to 1000 pages

>Last 2 books were close to 1000 pages
>Only about 200 pages of plot progression between the two of them
>The other 1800 pages consist of people eating breakfast or fucking
THE AMERICAN TOLKIEN INDEED

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LOOK AT HIM! Of course he'd write about eating breakfast all the time you silly faggot

Nothing really happened in LOTR outside of walking to a mountain so it's not really a fair comparison

Since when is Tolkien not american?

He's african

Mods, this isn't TV related

You know something else thats fucking annoying? Whenever people eat in the goddamn books the grease or juice drips down their chins and all I can picture is this goddamn fat fuck eating. NOT EVERYONE GETS FOOD ON THEIR FUCKING FACE WHEN THEY EAT GEORGE UNLIKE YOU YOU PIECE OF SHIT.

>inb4 "the sight of their arousal was arousing" copypasta

>my favorite genre fiction writer is better than your favorite genre

Read some decent books.

Don't forget shitting

FAT

>if he were born today hed be like ninja or his white trash gf
id read that version of LOTR

/lit/

Since always? He was from the UK (born in a colony located in Africa). How did you not know that

Tolkien is to creative literary genius what Martin is to hack pulp idiocy. They both so far surpass anyone else in their field that they will be remembered 1,000 years from now as a kind of yin and yang of fantasy, a Manichean duality of speculative letters. For every sublime, luminous beauty that Tolkien has gifted the world, Martin has cursed us with a tedious, banal ugliness. It is unfair to compare the two directly on any one point, because Martin is in every way the anti-Tolkien, patently sterile, parasitical, and inferior, but so much so that he becomes a monument in his own right, and counterbalances Tolkien. Could one exist without the other? Tolkien obviously could. But it is only by the contrast that Martin offers that we can truly appreciate the full depths and heights of Tolkien. Our understanding of Tolkien would be incomplete if Martin had never set pen to page. It is through only the abject failure and futility of Martin that we can approach an apprehension of the true scope and scale of Tolkien's hitherto inconceivable greatness. Perhaps this is what Tolkien had in mind when he wrote about the Music of the Ainur. If Tolkien is a subcreator in the image of Eru, truly Martin is like unto Melkor. It is only reflected in the awfulness of the one that we can fully see the goodness of the other.

He grew up in England dude. That's where he developed his love of the countryside that eventually inspired the creation of the Shire.

Tolkien was shit tho

>Tolkien manages to wrap up his epic magnum opus to define fantasy literature as a whole in less than a year within 3 books
>GRRM takes two fucking decades and has still not finished his hack pulp sexual cuckold fantasy

i dont watch the series

did they ever adapted this part?
youtube.com/watch?v=QmKhGqWcJGY

WE

WUZ

>Most of Tolkien's friends died during his service in The First World War
>GRRM got a few paper cuts while doing clerical work during Vietnam

What did you expect?

What?

LOTR was the product of decades of work, what would now be called world-building but what was then just Tolkien amusing himself by inventing languages and imaginary histories. That's why no other fantasy work can match its depth.

He wasn't faster at all. But he didn't have anyone waiting for him like GRRM has had for 20 years.

>Tolkien manages to wrap up his epic magnum opus to define fantasy literature as a whole in less than a year within 3 books

Tolkien had been working on LotR since the The Hobbit in 1937 and it wasn’t published until 1954, 17 years later but both works are based on writings he’d been doing since before WWI.

>She was sopping wet when he entered her. “Damn you,” she said. “Damn you damn you damn you.” He sucked her nipples till she cried out half in pain and half in pleasure. Her cunt became the world.

>And suddenly his cock was out, jutting upward from his breeches like a fat pink mast.

>The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.

>Sunset found her squatting in the grass, groaning. Every stool was looser than the one before, and smelled fouler. By the time the moon came up she was shitting brown water. The more she drank, the more she shat, but the more she shat, the thirstier she grew, and her thirst sent her crawling to the stream to suck up more water.

>The three men were erect. The sight of their arousal was arousing

AMERICAN TOLKIEN

>He grew up in England dude. That's where he developed his love of Islam that eventually inspired him to be a fat pedo.

>The other 1800 pages consist of people eating breakfast or fucking

Hemingway and Proust did this all the time.

>The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.

A good simile, just vulgar.

he's a hack fraud. ASOIAF is the literary equivalent of the tv show LOST stretched out over 25 years. None of the faggot plots in the books will be resolved in a stasifying way and nobody cares about where the characters will end up as you can see by the show. Everybody wants the big reveal. The grand enchilada. They want to see how MArtin will one up everyone and resolve the plots but he fucking won't. It will be gay as fuck and not as good as you think it will be even if the fat fuck miraculously manages to conclude the series before the heart attack gets to him. Everyone wants to know what the big enchilada and how it will play into the grand narrative: what do the others want? What does Euron want? Who is Azor Ahair? What does Rhollor want? Why are the seasons fucked up? Who built the seastone chair and the five forts? What is Asshai?What do the children of the forest want? What's lilfinger's master plan? What do the faceless men want? What does the iron bank want? What are the weirwood trees? etc etc and how will all of this shit tie in with the epic final narrative. All of it is gay the enchilda will be as shitty as the smokemosnster reveal in the last season of Lost. GRRM is a hack fraud but as any good hack fraud he knows how to hook the audience with the enchilada that will provoke countless and countless months and years of youtube and forum autism which is the authentic asoif experience. It's like the big foot with the four fingers statue in LOST. Why the ?FUCK is it there? It's there because the hack fraud knows that there has to be an enchilda. The lazy fuck even went as far as to just steal other people's enchilda's like Lovecraft who is actually good at mystery and worldbuilding GRRM just stole shit even the names: old gods, deep ones, mystery cults black magic, dark lands, cannibal lands, weird beyond the wall shit wooooh...wwooooo most of it won't be resolved and the shit that does get resolved will be shitty basic and mediocre.

Truly the Tolkien of our generation.

Who actually reads shit like this and finds it entertaining.

Maybe the only entertaining fact about his books are that they're shit?

When I watched the first season of GoT I couldn't stop thinking to myself that this was the most rediculous shit I had ever seen.

Proust did it to reflect upon his life and bring back lost memories. GRRM has absolutely no reason for putting eating on every other page. It serves no symbolic context.

WHITE

So, do you think the series is adequately trimming the fat? There's absolutely no indication of time passing. Aging, event progression, he'll, even hair growth. I love the story but even the most elementary aspects of storytelling have been left out here. It's pretty insulting.

epic, I like it

>B-but muh tax policy

The rest of the books will never be released. Martin will be forgotten shortly after the show is over. Tolkien is forever.

*hell

> not liking the Kings Moo
Faggot! You will never dine with the Drowned God

Post superior dark fantasy

Say enchilada one more time

5 books and we still don't know anything about the Westeros tax policy

Is this just a few choice excerpts, or is there a lot more? I'd like to read his work for the laughs if there's more like this.

>ywn have a year of intense creative drive, spending every day calling forth that mythical dreamworld whose presence you'd faintly felt ever since you were a child

>it's only a trilogy!
>well actually it's five books!
>t-two more and i'm done guys i swear!
fuck this fat fuck
D& D have no idea what they're going because GRRM doesn't either

How do white people feel when their "culture" was all actually thanks to Africans?

...

You have to understand. GRRM never intended to finish ASOIAF. He thought he'd work on it until he got bored, then ditch it for something else. Then suddenly, after a decade of writing in relative obscurity, HBO turns his books into the next big pop culture thing, and he's stuck with massive pressure to finish a series he has no interest in.

But now I think his motivations have changed. GRRM is a bitter man. His books are a way of forcing that bitterness onto the reader. He wants you to fall in love with a character, then kill that character. But something happened that he didn't expect. People fucking loved it. People loved the misery. Now he sees that if he gives people a happy ending, they love it. If he gives people a sad ending, they love it. The only way for him to truly make his fans miserable is to never finish, to leave them waiting expectantly on new books that will never come.

At last I truly see. George RR Melkor. The whiny cunt with daddy issues who wanted to make his own world and fucked it all up for everyone.

>The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.

I don't remember this line, where's it from in the books?

DRAGONS

Ryan Gosling?

NEDDDD BY GODS NEDDD FLYING EAGLES BUT NO TAX POLICIES. ATLEAST THERE ARE ELVISH WHOOOOORESSS

Joe Ambercrombie is good at storytelling until he gets to the end. Every book he touches has an absolute shit ending. The man thinks that he's oh so hip by defying fantasy tropes by writing absolutely random unsatisfying endings. The fucker adds Sopranos tier endings to his books and thinks he's fucking cool. Ruins otherwise good stories.

>He found a line and pulled on it, fighting toward the hatch to get himself below out of the storm, but a gust of wind knocked his feet from under him and a second slammed him into the rail and there he clung. Rain lashed at his face, blinding him. His mouth was full of blood again. The ship groaned and growled beneath him like a constipated fat man straining to shit.

Thanks.

JOE, STOP WRITING THESE SHIT ENDINGS AND SHUT THE DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR

>great characters all over the place
>adds a shitty edgy nigger bitch that completely fucking ruins everything

You actually think Tolkien is a good author? Fuck. You ARE a man child

kek dont post shit like this, I might actually read it.

GRRM is an actual writer tho