How do I not get hoodwinked into having a kid

How do I not get hoodwinked into having a kid

always wear a condom, never commit to marrying a woman

Don't throw the condom out. Flush it down the toilet

this thank you

Freeze some sperm at a fertilty clinic or sperm bank, idk, then get the procedure to be sterile, enjoy the rest of your life.

What, will bitches steal the semen from the fucking trash.

be ugly

shit i guess i did it

If you have to ask how crazy women are, you've never been in a relationship, or gay, senpai

its in the nba player manual brah

>mfw gf broke up with me because i wont commit/my "untreated" ptsd issues
>mfw im happy i dont have to deal with her emotional shit
>mfw ill never grab that booty again though
>mfw i cant remember if i flushed that last condom a week and a half ago when we drunkenly fucked

oh well

I was gettin a blow job once and I caught the bitch spitting it out and rubbing it into her pussy

vasectomy my man
but never tell her, just continue to fuck her raw every night until the day she realizes

then get a new one

...

...

Hey brad what's my sloppy seconds taste like?

that seems like a compliment to me though

Don't hoodwink yourself into thinking sex is worth it in the first place, or thinking that a condom is some magic pass that ensures consequence free sex, or that a woman can't ruin your life if you don't get her pregnant, or that a woman can't, fairly easily, push you into marriage if she really wants to.

You know what kind of homeowners burglars love? The kind that hide their valuables from burglars - saves the burglar a ton of time and risk because they know exactly where to look for stuff to steal.

REQUESTING GREENTEXT STORY ABOUT THE user THAT TRICKED A BITCH INTO TRICKING HIM THEY HAD A CHILD, BUT IN REALITY HE HAD A VASECTOMY DONE AGES BEFORE.

Vasectomies can be reversed. So you could get one, and undo it when you actually want to have kids. As a bonus, if she says she's pregnant you can be sure it's not yours and that's she's a cheating bitch.

bumping for that image, I need it lads.

Bradley is a clear improvement, women like her love the socialite life and Ronaldo spent his days at his mom's house. Good on her.

The process to reverse is supposed to be extremely painful. Just bank it.

...

...

don't have it sorry
my devilish mind came up with this all on it's own

>mfw for some reason i can get hard, but never cum when im fucking some chick
>mfw ive faked every orgasm with the last 3 girls i was with

loser, your question should be how to make enough money for kids plural.

Beat you by 5 seconds gypsy

snip snip

Please, I really need that image, I'm sure some of you know the one I'm refering to. My memory is hazy (I think it was a greentext story, can't confirm 100%), but it was about this user who had a vasectomy and never told anyone about it.

He got into a relationship and the bitch thought she could get away with the usual and so (((she))) got pregnant LE SOMEHOW :DDD, and he decided to play the long game and deliver the sickest burn in the history of roastie burns.

wrong pic

Thanks, hivemind. I will never not love this story.

Scroll up numbnuts.

Simmer down Sven back in the shed with you

Something i'll have to keep in mind.

that one makes me sad though. Every person involved in the story is pretty scummy

Guess I'll never follow my own advice

The greatest love story of our time. 10/10

nigger relax, I posted that before seeing the reply.

fuck. This story right here. It's just so beautiful, I'm sure it must be a fake, I mean it can't get any more perfect than this. To see someone so scummy finally get their comeuppance.

If any anons don't want to have children, please be like this man. I want roasties all over the world to have this exact same experience of having planned all your life to be a leech and have your whole plan crumble down in less than 5 minutes. It must be the greatest feeling ever to catch them like that.

Makes me diamonds, familia.

Eh, the guy never said he wanted a long-term relationship or kids. He was upfront about his intentions.

jesus christ

>must be fake
That's actually one of the believable comeuppance greentexts though. Girls trapping guys they didn't know had vasectomies is depressingly common

Yo is there something like this forreal?

Wouldnt flushing the condom risk fucking up the plumbing?

>the guy never said he wanted a long-term relationship or kids

does not mean

>He was upfront about his intentions.

I don't care about the kids. I'd love to have kids. What I'm worried about is the woman and how she may try to ruin everything for me.

Never have sex with a woman in a country you are a citizen of.

Fwiw, they have a massive 10x15 ft screen at water purification plants that's pretty much just there to catch used condoms, and they're piled on like 3-4 inches thick.

>I want roasties all over the world to have this exact same experience of having planned all your life to be a leech
yet you still see /r9k/, and that means a good deal of Sup Forumsacks, complaining about how they can't find a good 50's style stay at home wife

if only there was a way to bring these kinds of people together. How much better would the world actually be

>how do I ensure my biological failure

I think you already have.

Wait, where can we get that manual? Google is not revealing the manual's location. Why is it so easy to find manuals online for the military but not for the NBA?

Yes it's for real. I lived next door to James harden in the dorms. In future NBA player world their "wives" are their high school sweetheart that "accidentally" got pregnant and they are given a free pass to smash pussy in college

...

Sure, legally speaking. But fucking a woman over a long period of time and acting like you have no further obligations is the height of selfish degeneracy.

Women don't exist for our mere sexual gratification. It is disingenuous to hide behind the "Oh, well we verbally agreed there was no commitment here, so I'm in the clear".

Women will wait, hoping you'll change your mind. It's in their biological nature to want, need to reproduce. If they don't already have 2-3 pets (and even then) they probably need to have a baby at some point.

The person who wrote that story admitted that it was already very obvious the woman wanted children. What she did was shitty, no doubt, but taking advantage of a woman who is eager to reproduce just for cock-yuks is equally shitty.

Like the other person said, everybody in that story is pretty scummy.

>Women don't exist for our mere sexual gratification.
And men don't exist to be solely women's providers.

I've been letting my beard and hair grow for a while and I look like a mess, but thanks to your post I know what to do

As long as he didn't lead her on and was upfront about what he wanted out of the relationship, he didn't do anything wrong. If she wanted something more, then she could've chosen to end the relationship.

Your argument is that mutual agreements to fuckfriendship is sexist against women.

End your life with a lawnmower.

Castrate yourself. Or better yet kill yourself.

Bradley Cooper is a known closet faggot.

Irina Shayk fucks Putin

>use a condom that you brought, not one she has
>flush it or take it with you
>get a vasectomy
>don't get roped into being a beta

what

>bj
>condom
???

>But fucking a woman over a long period of time and acting like you have no further obligations is the height of selfish degeneracy.

No, you're wrong. If the woman wants more she should demand it. Each sexual encounter is its own isolated event, just because you have them repeatedly DOES NOT ENTITLE YOU TO A LEGAL/FINANCIAL RELATIONSHIP.

Sounds like a fulfilling life this piece of shit leads.

k

That's just your dick telling you it knows better than you. Listen to your dick.

>getting this mad over someone calling you numbnuts for being a retard

He said a mean thing on the internet, I was very triggered :( the least I could do was respond!

Those people are double-thinking retards.

I'm just happy someone got the punishment they deserve. I have no interest in marrying someone, I prefer solitude tbhfam

Don't flush it down, but take it with you.

Are you a nigger? Fucking kys.

until you have to pay child support for 18 years

>Women will wait, hoping you'll change your mind

So they made a choice to continue despite knowing the intentions?

All their fault then?

Everything aside that seems like a beautiful jacket and shirt.

I bet he does lead am awesome life.