Cartman saw a vagina irl before you

>cartman saw a vagina irl before you

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Does it have to be a spread one?
I've seen a couple of real life vaginas during figure drawing

This all works together

How do I lose belly fat in 1 week?

I need to know...for a friend. A 296lbs friend.

That's okay.
It's not like I was ever expecting to see one in the first place.

Did Heidi trick him though? When he was walking around on Mars those vagina structures still had balls on them. I could see Heidi trolling him by attaching some fake balls.

I touched the neighbor girl's vagina a few times as a kid, don't know if I actually saw it. Did see my stepsisters once when she showed us.

It means Cartman is bi

I'm 27 i have fucked a little more than 50 girls even though i had spend at least 12 years with different gf.

The easiest way to get pussy is to have a gf, girls love when guys cheat with them.

Do tell.

burn more calories than you take in.

Losing weight is not pleasant. When you're doing it right, you feel hungry, because you're eating at a slight calorie deficit. Your body will not like being asked to burn fat. It will like actually burning fat even less. The only thing that ever alleviates this is getting "runner's high" or the repeating endorphin rushes of a good workout that you enjoy.

Stay strong, fatty ding-dongs.

But how do you get a girlfriend though?

>50 girls even though i had spend at least 12 years with different gf.
>a new/different girl every 3 months

shameful. I would have respected a dozen, maybe two. You have no taste or class

What is there to tell? Kids are curious.
We played doctor and I had to touch her for whatever reason because she was 'pregnant' and I was the 'doctor'.

I remember that I was actually on top of her at one point and 'trying to have sex' as much as a little kid is able to, absolutely no idea where I got the idea to do that.
Basically when I tried it just felt like I needed to pee so I ran off to the bathroom, that was it.

>smiling
s l u t

so what? are you really proud of yourself?

Joke's on you I saw a couple of hookers' vaginas that I was too drunk to fuck.
Haha!

Don't think I took a close look at the vagina of the prostitute(s) I had sex with. Was a classy place where they made you wear a rubber so I assume it was okay.

You can't
Depending on how fat are you it will be in the medium or super long run
but this guy got it

She is trans. Or at the very least has a penisgina.

Fucking manwhore
Girls aren't attracted to your dirtied dick

Will she dick him down?

I totally missed this scene somehow

He didn't though.

it was last episode during the rewind to when he called ghostbusters unfunny because of the chicks

Nah, if you eat good foods like egg, fish, chicken etc you should stay satiated

You also stop craving shitty foods if your diet is good

So we've seen the penises of Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Token, Tweek, Craig, Stan, Kyle, and some other boys. But Trey and Matt didn't have the guts to show Heidi's her-gee. Cowards.

why is it okay to show male underage genitals and not female ones?
I always assumed most pedophiles are gay men?

The human body is pretty good at regulating its own caloric intake. Junk food and synthetic stuff deliberately tries to fuck that, leaving you hungry despite high calorie intake.

Sleep full nights. Eat healthier food. Eat less food (or LOTS of veg). Increase aerobic work. Drink more water (less juice). Avoid "diet" memes.

Literally. Do the same shit as thin people.

Jokes on you I was raped when I was 16 by a chick when I was drunk as fuck

There we have it folks.

Matt and Trey have had an entire episode with the boys all waving their underage dicks around, but they won't show a little girl's vagina even during a scene that went by in a literal second.

They had less to go on when making fun of GRRM for this.

They tried to get it by the censors but they flat out refused.

not working for me

i've lost weight as in if I get on a scale the number is lower
my pants also dont fit me anymore so my waist slim

but my gut and man titties won't go away no matter how much i've been losing

honestly if I could just get rid of the man boobs id be happy

how none of my pants fit properly anymore even with belt and the fat still here is baffling

Because dicks are funnier than pussies.

Stop making excuses, you fat fuck.

honestly if I knew id have to buy new work clothes id have not bothered

it was a waste of time and effort for no gain

Sauce?

Skin isn't fat. Skin is skin. You have to lose skin the old fashioned way, that is I have no idea how people lose skin.

Couldn't they use axes as well?

Find a TDEE (Total Daily Energy Expenditure) calculator online, find out how much you burn roughly at a sedentary state, and eat less calories than that.

Each pound is about 3500 calories, so for example if you ate at a deficit of 500 (not a huge difference for even a average healthy weight man) a day you would lose a pound in slightly over a week.

If you increase the deficit, you will lose weight faster, but if you go too hard you might struggle and end up relapsing, so ease into it.

Buy a food scale, they are not that expensive, and weigh and log all of your food. Do not eyeball anything, most people are very inaccurate.

Try to eat filling and lower calorie food. Veggies, protein, meats, eggs, good stuff. You can allow yourself to eat a treat now and again, but it should still fit into your calorie limit for losing weight. It is probably best to just go cold turkey with junk food in the beginning.

If you choose to do exercise, do you reward yourself with food. A candy bar or 2 can negate all calories lost from a workout.

Also keep in mind that "calories burned per workout" is complete "point singularity sphere in a frictionless vacuum" tier nonsense. Your metabolism will remain elevated well after a good workout (40+min hard cardio) as it repairs and rebuilds, and as a bonus it will suppress your appetite to reduce food intake.

The only humans who survived the ancient famines were the ones who could reduce their calorie use the fastest. Muscle is the FIRST thing to be lost in a diet. Less muscle means less energy gets used, which is how people rebound. Exercise is always important to getting in shape.

Not true
I raped my 15 year old babysitter when I was 5

Like pottery.

Honestly they look, feel and smell weird

He didn't. Vaginas arent anything special anyway, its more about the woman's body and that soft flesh.

Penises are much better, seriously.

>Stay strong, fatty ding-dongs.
You just triggered me, I want to eat those stupid cakes now

I'm used to mine but I don't want to touch another man's dick
cum also tastes worse than puss

>eat less food

No
Don't do that
what are you saying

Wow. Literal flavorless poison. Enjoy being a gravity slave fatty.

Nah, they're great honestly. Nice and strong looking even the smaller ones. Cum taste great btw. You just sound like a fag.

>flavorless
I agree with the poison part but if it was flavorless I wouldn't be so fat

> Has literally never eaten good chocolate before
> Has literally never eaten good cake before
> Has literally never eaten good whipped vanilla creme before
Ya nah. Your choice of food is shit and your body reflects that by becoming shit. STEP UP YOUR GAME.

Or at least eat some higher quality candy. FUCK.

>gif
Really?? Is it 2003?

Youre gross. Have some self control. Replace candy and sweets with fruit. It taste better anyway. Also dont eat fries, chips or drink soda. Youll lose 100 lbs.

> but if it was flavorless I wouldn't be so fat
It's actually the opposite. Flavorless food leaves the appetite dissatisfied, so you end up eating MORE. That's BAD.

Tasty food is VERY important.

Spoken like a true virgin.

Nope, I've slept with more women than you probably will your whole life back when I was a Chad and the novelty of it has worn off. Vaginas arent attractive by themselves mate, stop watching so much porn.

>The noise playing during the fast forward/rewind bits was the lie he told her being played in reverse

Reminds me of the episode where he stole Jimmy's joke but legitimately thought he come up with it because of how ridiculous his memory of it was. Obviously not the case here though since he knows its a lie.

With a knife

If that was true America would be losing the war on obesity to gruel, not MTN Dew and pizza.

How will Heidi react to the inevitable reveal of his shotty comment?
Will she cry?

It will mean little to her compared to being lied to by someone she trusted.

>She hated the new Ghostbuster too
>Is only mad at Cartman because he lied to her
Calling it now

What Cartman thinks is the worst thing in his email history is literally nothing. Heidi tells him it's okay to have an opinion.

The actually horrible things that he's not even thinking about are what cause her to drop his ass and never look back

Pretty much anybody who's not blind has seen one before.

Y'know, because of the whole birth thing.

>inb4 cesarian

no, your momma did not get to wear her panties while they cut her open

That wouldn't make sense though. Everyone knew Cartman was a piece of shit before he tried changing his ways last season to the point where they figured he was full of shit up until his social media access was murdered.

No ones going to brag about seeing their own mothers vagina other than Shadman user.

Well no, the axe goes *in* the wound.

The flashlight was a hilarious touch.

>other than Shadman
Is there a story here? Morbid curiosity

Google "Shadman mothers day"
Or better, don't. It's exactly what you think.

What did he need the flashlight for, anyway?

>irl

It's a cartoon.

I've fucked 2 girls and one of them was a hooker.

>tfw all three times a didn't cum

Maybe I should stop fapping so much. Or be sober when I have sex. Or at least not almost passed out drunk.

It's cartmans real life.

He also stuck his penis in a boys mouth and took pictures before me.

He stuck another boys penis in his own mouth and took pictures.

That's literally the joke.

Both happen.

He stuck his cock in Butters' mouth but he didn't get the picture. Stephen interrupted him.

I just realized this guy is the biggest troll of them all.

youtube.com/watch?v=-56XZJSQfxc

You should really do something about it.

His last name literally meaning "Betrayer" might have something to do with that.

Really?

translate.google.com/#da/en/bedrager

Interesting

Vaginas are gross and unfunny. Penises are cute and funny.

Why does he need a flashlight?

Trolltrace is a terrifying concept and probably not far from being reality.

No he didn't. I'm not a normie by any means but come on. I'm a virgin but it's because I'm morbidly obese and I physically can't actually get inside my girlfriend. I can pleasure her pretty well with my hands though.

Go ahead, make fun of me for being fat or whatever.

This is some weaponised autism.
>there are people who genuinely haven't seen vag
>there are people who've never been kissed
I mean, I hate myself but sometimes boards like Sup Forums REALLY cheer me up.

Holy crap.

You're almost as defensive as you are fat

So Sup Forums, what was your gf in 4th grade like? don't tell me you didn't have one, every 4th grader in south park other than kyle has had one.

They had to have found that before they started this season, because in the final chorus it goes "And the maiden threw herself from the high tower", no doubt inspiring their Danish athlete's suicide method.

The last woman to sing is a qt3.14

Does it count if you can't remember it?

>tfw i had to pay $5 cover charge to see a 40 year old single mom stripper flash her pussy on stage
>tfw it technically counts

IE eat less fatty, Download an app like myfitness pal you can search for fast good shit there and have all the macros