It's Robert's day off

>it's Robert's day off

...

Hate it too. Tyrone doesn't please my wife like Robert does

robert got popped!?

>tfw they ran out of plastic spoons for your popcorn

>it's Robert's day off

>they charged me 13 dollars for fucking POPCORN
how is this shit allowed?

>tfw they send you to the popcorn mines for no reason
WHAT THE FUCK

Hello darkness my old friend

no one goes to theaters anymore

this meme is DEAD

>tfw 11 dollars for a ticket and twizzlers on a friday night

>I'm nominated to clean the falcon shit after the kino
>5 hours and 2000 lashings later I'm allowed to leave but have to be back the next day to serve a week in the popcorn mines

>ask for semen on the side
>get it dumped all over my popcorn like I'm some kind of savage
>they still expect their fucking tip

What do you have to search to find Robert on Jewgle?

I remember one moody december, on a rainy day, a back-alley stray dog day, sitting in a quiet movie theatre with my Pa. Not a large chain or anything like that. Not a franchise. Just a one room block that showed movies every sometimes in the spaces between the important days. There was a dry-cleaner upstairs and the machines would rattle throughout the films like the distant carriages running through our eastern line. I remember these things better than the film itself. We sat in plush chairs. Ate popcorn. I remember the smell. The toasty butter and salt. I was happier then than I would ever be again.

If only I had known.

The days are long here in the mine. Buttercough has swept my district and left most laid up. It wont be long before I wake up with my throat clogged and my body weak. Don't pray for me.

Rejoice!

Good to know, so I dress up for James.

>carriage arrives too early to the theatreplex
>only tip the coachman 19%
>he throws horse manure at my raven and tells me he hopes my movie sucks
>now I have to mumble along the answers to random movie trivia alongside another earlybird in order to fool the spotlight into pretending i'm with a group
>only one there is some guy that's obviously masturbating

that's what i get for going to see WW alone

...

...

Ansngngs

Hey, Rober-!!

Doesnt matter, the popcorn man will make his way down the isles.

>theatre gremlin steals your shoe again
>and your sock

>and your other sock

That's Jules, dummy.

how the tables have turned

>conveyor belt is faster than expected
>don't have time to see what movies are playing before I reach the counter
>flustered, literally mumble out ‘surprise me’
>so he gives me a ticket to a chick flick that's already ten minutes in, and prepares an extra large popcorn with an extra large coke, an extra large hotdog, extra large crab leg bucket, and a platinum membership for the cinema cage fighting club
>had to overdraw to afford it
>just got my jaw broke in the cage
>the chick flick was shit, even for shit

>approaching kinotower from parking slab
>the fat of the obese is squozen fresh out of dark cages dangling above the entrance
>YER COMPLIMENTARY BUCKET, M'LORD
>the door servant is especially cloying today
>inside, hundreds of children perform labourious tasks like stoking the popcorn boiler
>small bodies collapse through coordinated gaps in the ground as fresh workers are deployed on the IMAX bellows
>the attached arcade lurches unpleasantly as the wealthy, fat children bully and bite chunks out of the smaller, more poverse welps
>I present the cashier with several gift cards and coupons, she passes them through a ticket grinder and tabulates their worth;
>OCH, 'TEVEN SHECKLES AFORE FOOSDAY WILL SEE YOU PAST TUESDY!' AAAA AAAACCCCH HAAAAW HAWWW HAACCCCCH
>she wretches and coughs and offers you your stub: 103 minutes, or 90 minutes of a pixar film
>i trade in 40 minutes for a pack of twizzlers. the catamites running the snackbsr glare at me hungrily, but I batter them back with coiled newspaper. the manager will be hearing about those unruly sexlets.
>I enjoy 60 minutes of the Owen wilson film 'marmaduke'. 3 people are stabbed in the dark in a cutthroat plot mandated by the manager, and i'm forcibly removed at the 60th minute

NANI?!

>Drop your soap in the cinema showers
>designated homo isnt even there to fill your bum

>go to the popcorn salt stand
>someone drew faces on all the pickles in the pickletub

>tfw even movie stars bring their feathered friends to bypass no single policies
It's time to end this tyranny.