Are you ready for some new Seagal-kino?

Are you ready for some new Seagal-kino?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/4KlyHwnPqns
youtube.com/watch?v=LuqpR7BK3M0
youtube.com/watch?v=GQXscAH02pk
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

>Seagal-kino

He hardly performs any of his own moves these days, gets in stunt doubles to do even the most basic of shit.

Found a new cover for the "shitty movie poster" threads we have on here

he's a big guy.

Seagal never uses a stuntman and does everything himself actually, he completed Navy SEAL training for a reason

fat seagal best seagal

I've seen enough seagal kino to know how this is going to play out. The two guys in the background will be the main characters and Seagal will appear for a few minutes. Mostly sitting or laying down, and if he fights his legs will not move an inch.

>''Seagal now claims hes of colombian ancestry and was part of the Medellin Cartel''

He doesn't want to injure the other stuntmen with his godlike fighting skills

mutha fucker birthdays back on the menu lads?

I mean he gets in stuntmen in place of himself. Any Seagal film that has been made in the last 10 years is usually like this, often shot from behind where you can tell it's not him doing stuff.

>fat literal cuck tries to relive his """glory""" years

Pathetic. After this movie is a spiritual and financial failure, I sincerely hope Seagull does the only manly thing he will ever do and kills himself.

He actually taught them how to use machetes in their torture operations, giving them the ability to chop off limbs without the subject bleeding out too fast by cutting at just the right spots.

>actor names over the wrong person

why do (((they))) always do this?

>Be credited as the main character on dvd.
>Let others do the fighting and acting.

How does he do it bros?. Truly a patrician action star.

youtu.be/4KlyHwnPqns

The two actors are merely pretending to speak to eachother.In fact Seagal never appears together with any of the other main actors of the film.

His voice in Kill Switch had me laughing too.

Tarantino should cast Seagal in some role. I feel he could capture Seagals spunk more than any other director would.

>Be super elite operator operating operationally
>Have perfectly clean clothes, gun and chest rig

I don't know why this always triggers me so much.

Will it beat this masterpiece?

Machete managed it pretty well.

>GSP
Lel. What is this 2005?

youtube.com/watch?v=LuqpR7BK3M0

How much did Apple pay him?

i know right, not a single drip of dressing and not fat stains from all the fries.

So this is the kino where the seagalonaskateboard.gif is from.

>that xxl uniform and the chest rig sitting on his belly as he waddles forward

This happened in one of the only modern ones I bothered to watch a few months ago. goerge saint pierre was in that one too and it was fucking terrible. Seagal practically wasn't in the film besides a few interview scenes lmao. Hang on, it's not actually pic related is it? pretty sure the guy on the right was in it too.

>But Seagal’s roughly 15 minutes of screen time are ultimately a distraction — especially when he gets his own clumsy fight scene with St-Pierre. With his thick leather coat, bushy goatee, tinted glasses, and whispery monotone voice, he looks like an ordinary schlub in a Steven Seagal costume. He makes the movie more marketable … but at what price?

My question is: how buys this fucking shit?

How is it profitable for him?

someone post the webm of him skateboarding through the frame

WHA' HABBEN?

>With his thick leather coat
Friendly reminder that all those atrocious coats he wears are actually custom-made bullet-proof coats. The company sells a whole bunch of them that looks like regular jackets or even regular short-sleeve shirts, but Seagal has a fucking terrible fashion sense.

Money-laundrying for actual cartels from fuck's know where.

Seagal is a godlike deity that does not care for worldly values like money

Top 10 Anime Fight Scenes
youtube.com/watch?v=GQXscAH02pk

Do you think that Seagal's friendship with Putin is related?

Kino

What will be next for Seagal? Will we ever see South-America drug cartel-era Seagal?

Sup Forums im fuck! I've been compared to two different handsome actors, but an uncle I hate tells me that I look like Seagal

what? did seagal lost?

Jesus, that thumbnail makes Tyson look like black voldemort.

you are done, good luck user

now in every family reunion your uncle will mock you with the seagal joke and everybody will ask you who is steven seagal, and then someone would explain that he is the guy from the action movies that run like a faggot