We need someone who looks like a recently divorced middle aged loser to wear unbuttoned dad shirts and shill our...

>We need someone who looks like a recently divorced middle aged loser to wear unbuttoned dad shirts and shill our website.
>I know just the guy.

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youtube.com/watch?v=WphYx4kIiMo
youtube.com/watch?v=eA5MNQ4f1uc
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mom says this guy is sexy every time he shows up
dad laughs it off and just sits there all awkwardly

hotel?

Literally who?

every time or once user?

literally every single time

He comes to your house?

we got the same commercial here in sweden and even tho it's not the same game it's the same kind of guy so I assume they're aiming for the same demographic

do men have it easier getting laid when they're older if they stay in shape? asking for a friend who missed out on puppy love

I can see where she's coming from (no pun intended)

on the tv ya pinhead

...

They sure know how to pick spokespeople. This guy for the older ladies with money and the nubile Australian woman for men of all ages.

>tfw been having sex since I'm 14

fuck you

He explains how he got the gig in an episode of The Bone Zone. It's interesting

the aussie girl is great desu

this guy is hot af

he's a big guy... for me

>mfw I noticed that the Trivago guy is also the pepto bismol guy. "...upset stomach, diarrhea"

He's alright

He is pretty handsome tbqhwy fampai

No homo.

Captain Obvious>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Trivago guy

He comes to your house?

That guy is obviously gay though.

TRIVAGOED

>19 and a half
times running out lads

oats and squats my boy

>21 and still haven't been on a date
Welp

TWENTY TWO
W
E
N
T
Y

T
W
O

He comes to your house?

tl;dr?

I'll up you one, 23

23 and got laid last year, felt pointless since i just wanted to lose my virginity and i didn't like her
the only way sex must be any good after teen years is if you are in love and making a family

31, bitch

wait, so you're telling me, that if i hold up for 11 more years, i'll become invincible?
damn

>the only way sex must be any good after teen years is if you are in love
Actually it's like that as a teen too once you get your virginity out of the way. Sex without emotional attachment is rarely worth the effort.

>middle aged

Can you cast Fireball at that level?

I hope you leveled teleport first

We have this dude in Latinamerica and apparently there's a different one for other countries

lol. beta detected

That's actually the middle-aged single guy look. They're hired so housewives can fantasize about meeting someone like that in their new hotels. You know, just neighbors bumping into each other in the corridor while the hubbies are none the wiser looking some football.

>having long time relationships is beta behaviour
damn they sure did a number on your goy head

So one of them is a gay couple with a bisexual person?

Id fuck him over me if i was a woman. Only reason id pick me over him is if i had money, which i do. So id not fuck him but fuck myself cuz $$$

>long time relationships
your mastery of the english language is without peer. also
>i-i just don't want to have sex guys
get cucked faggot

We got this cutie in Europe.

Dude, established relationships are literal boner killers.

Sex is awesome when you're doing something unexpected, wild, with someone hot and that you hardly know, where you feel no pressure and can just let go, try and explore your fetishes.

Ah, the "mothers/wives i'd like to fuck" look.

Sounds like you've had bad relationships.

That sounds exactly how I imagine single mothers are made

only for those dumb enough not to use birth control

My grandma thinks he's cute

Me on the right

Another downside of one night stands. I don't trust a random ho ready to sleep with strangers to take his birth control and fucking with a condom is absolutely horrible compared to the real thing.

It's not that, is that eventually other things get in the way, your significant other becomes almost like a sibling and shit just becomes too vanilla.

That's how the estrogen ends up in the water supply

iktf senpai

Are these commercials Canadian? Because there's something off about them that make them look just foreign enough

You shouldn't trust the woman. Women hardly ever think about condoms, leaving that responsibility to the guy, and if you don't bring it up they rarely remind you, since they're all about "being taken by the emotion of the moment". And they often don't understand they own fucking cycle, confusing themselves with the birthcontrols.

Trust me, i knew my ex cycle better than she did and had to pretty much take care of her body for her, not to mention the tons of bareback sex i had with stranger chicks just because.

your dad is a cuck user, I'm sorry but it's genetic

Longest relationship I've been in was a little over 3 years and it never got old. I'm sure when you've been married for a decade things are at a risk of getting stale but that hasn't happened to me so far.

What you described here is the opposite of my experience in most ways. In a relationship you know the boundaries. You know you can put your finger in her ass and she won't object. You know what turns her on. She knows what turns you on. Sex with strangers is exactly the opposite of "no pressure", it feels like you're trying to prove your worth to her and when it's over you just feel like you want to get the fuck out of there. It's dull sex lacking everything but the physical feel of inserting your penis into a vagina. You don't even know if you're allowed to do what it is you want or if it'll piss her off.

Sex in a relationship is a physical manifestation of emotion and afterwards you just want to cuddle and be close to the person important enough to you to make you feel that way.

And, you know, the whole condom thing. Nothing ruins the thrill of spontaneous sex like having to put a fucking rubber on.

He comes to your house?

I'd rather risk it than wear a condom tbph.

>tfw lost it at 14
feels good

nice projection there OP

just learn how to control your nut and it's fine, just pull out when it's time

>do men have it easier getting laid when they're older if they stay in shape? asking for a friend who missed out on puppy love
Yes. As you get older it becomes a man's market, as women's sexual mileage goes off a cliff and they see all their friends getting married or preparing for spinsterhood. And here you come Mr. Clean with your 45 years and your salt-and-pepper and a car and a dog and a house not papered over with magazine clipping. And that woman will jump on your cock so fast your head will spin.

Younger girls also love that shit, so you'll have to beat them off with a stick if you're handsome.

>pull out
Terrible meme. Thrusting your load deep inside is the best part for both parties.

>pulling out
Have you ever tried NOT pulling out?

Because after I busted raw I realized I have NO fucking hope of pulling out, it feels too damn good brah.

Got a vasectomy it's so good.

>In a relationship you know the boundaries
>You know what turns her on
>Sex in a relationship is a physical manifestation of emotion
>afterwards you just want to cuddle and be close to the person
>Sex with strangers
>it feels like you're trying to prove your worth to her
>when it's over you just feel like you want to get the fuck out of there
>It's dull sex lacking everything but the physical feel of inserting your penis into a vagina
>You don't even know if you're allowed to do what it is you want

Dude, i'm sorry, but your problem is that you're a insecure little bitch.

The fuck should i care about boundaries and cuddling when having sex with a literal who? I've the perfect opportunity to mess the chick up and afterwards bail, never to see her again avoiding having to deal with her shit.

Being you must be a constant never-ending grinding pressure. Shit must suck.

Why should i pull out? If the chick gets preggo that's her problem. Most chicks are scared shitless of imposing their problem on the man anyway, since they're generally insecure as fuck.

I just bust it raw and then give a lame excuse like "i was so caught up with the moment i didn't even realized it. God, you're so hot". Always works.

> If the chick gets preggo that's her problem
this guy

>The fuck should i care about boundaries
Boundaries as in knowledge of what boundaries don't exist. I know she won't get pissy all of a sudden because I did something I wanted. In a relationship you only have to go through that once and then you know it's fair game. In one night stands you have to start all over again.
>and cuddling when having sex with a literal who?
Of course you don't want to cuddle a literal who, and that's why sex with them sucks.

It's literally missing half of what makes sex enjoyable.

...is a virgin larping on a vietnamese cartoon board.

>no one posted the japanese one yet

AGAIN, i'm asking why should i care about what the literal who chick care about or want?

If i feel like sticking my thump up her virgin tight ass all of a sudden i'll do it. Fuck if it hurts a bit and she didn't liked it. I'll never see her again. The same about having to impress her with my sexual prowess. Shit is about what i want to do, about my sexual release.

I'm not a goddamn athlete fighting to win some sponsorship, for Christ's sake. I'm banging some chick i hardly know and probably won't ever have to see again.

>Of course you don't want to cuddle a literal who, and that's why sex with them sucks.
>It's literally missing half of what makes sex enjoyable.
You sound like a fag. I fucked a prostitute like 3 weeks ago. I never met this girl. She was only fucking me for the money. Couldn't even play hockey with her tonsils.

She was STILL a blast to fuck, it was great. Tiny and tight. Condom didn't bother me at all. Usually I hate them but she was such a spinner I did not care.

Honestly, I would sooner fuck quality whores than put up with a mediocre gf.

youtube.com/watch?v=WphYx4kIiMo

>Most chicks are scared shitless of imposing their problem on the man anyway,
Ah, a virgin larping again, how cute.

Tell me a scenario where a girl got pregnant after a one nightstand and felt the courage to confront the guy. Come on, you don't even need to have an active sexual life. Most of you must have had female friends or known female acquaintances that have faced shit like that.

80% of the time they freak out and either abort it or decide to raise the child themselves. Rarely they feel the courage to face up the stranger and share the responsibility of the mess.

Women frequently do illogical things that lead to their own ruin.

You're such a dumbass. A brother of a friend had a one night stand. She got preggo and didn't want an abortion. He's stuck paying child support.

>AGAIN, i'm asking why should i care about what the literal who chick care about or want?
Had you ever had sex in real life and weren't just roleplaying you'd know that sex is infinitely better when both parties are enjoying it and giving it their all, instead of just penetrating some bag of meat that really isn't into it.
>Fuck if it hurts a bit and she didn't liked it. I'll never see her again.
Had you ever had sex in real life and weren't just roleplaying you'd know women can change their mind in a fraction of a second and she could just tell you to get the fuck out. Unless you're the romanian town rapist people tend to avoid situations where they have sex with an unwilling woman.
>Shit is about what i want to do, about my sexual release.
Yeah and the sexual release is only a minor part of what makes good sex good. Sounds like you've never had good sex if you think it's just about emptying your balls.

Dude, you're just insecure as fuck. Look at this:

>sex is infinitely better when both parties are enjoying it and giving it their all, instead of just penetrating some bag of meat that really isn't into it.

Why are you thinking that a stranger wouldn't feel good during sex and that is only capable of happening with an established girlfriend? My guess is because only then you can feel for a 100 percent sure that you did a good job from her known tells. Something YOU need to feel better about yourself.

You treat sex like a goddamn job where you're battling for that long awaited promotion. Reevaluate your goddamn life. Seriously.

¿Hotel? Trivago.

You keep spouting these meme words that are in no way connected to the messages you're replying to. How is knowing what I like a sign of insecurity? Isn't it the other way around?
>Why are you thinking that a stranger wouldn't feel good during sex and that is only capable of happening with an established girlfriend?
I never said that, I said it's easy to have BETTER sex when you already know what the other person likes instead of having to do trial and error all over again

Nothing else in your post made any sense so I won't bother replying.
>Tell me a scenario where a girl got pregnant after a one nightstand and felt the courage to confront the guy.
Literally 100% of women what the fuck?

I know somebody in the last phase in the right. I mean I've forgotten who he is, but I have a pic of his imitator.

>guaranteed by the state to receive a huge sum of money at a time they need it the most
>turn it down because too afraid to admit they had a one night stand... to the person they had a one night stand with?
things that never happened

I'm gay and I think he's hot. Wouldn't do a double take but id let him take me out on a divorced middle aged loser adventure.

Again, why is it important to know what the other person likes? That's YOU, user. That's your NEED. I get the impression you're constantly trying to win female approval.

I, personally, don't care about that. Sex should be something good and fun that you do to enjoy yourself. Not a test you're doing to win scores with someone.

Think about it. Why do you think people have one night stands? Go for professionals? Hell, why do you think people cheat on their significant others? Because sex is supposed to be enjoyable. Something they do for their own benefit.

Not everyone treat it as a test to reaffirm their social validation.

we get her every once in awhile in america

>19
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

...

Here's the Norwegian guy, a balding sami

He comes to your house?

youtube.com/watch?v=eA5MNQ4f1uc

Why are most infomercial male actors in nordic countries either some brunette caveman-like ugly motherfucker or some blond feminine fake-like looking pussy?

superior version
youtube.com/watch?v=WphYx4kIiMo

>why do men from nordic countries look nordic