What orders from Mordor, my lord? What does the IRS command?

>What orders from Mordor, my lord? What does the IRS command?

They're taking the hobbits to IRS!

You are Isildur's heir...not Isildur himself.
>The same debt runs through my veins

Ayyyy I wanna discuss the bonus situation

Uruk scum how do they have a dental plan?

>The corporation was bankrupted!
>It has been refinanced!

We've had a 1% pay cap increase for THREE STINKING YEARS

Gondor requires a bail out!

>Frodo... any chance of seeing that
old Portfolio of mine again? The one I gave you.
>I'm sorry, Uncle. I'm afraid I had to liquidate it.
>Oh....Pity. I should like to have invested... one last time.

What about second mortgage?

New menu

*cough*

shieeeeeet... you know i woulda cosigned that mofuggin' loan, my nigga...

my brotha... my kang.

>I was there, Gandalf, 3000 fiscal quarters ago. When Isildur filed his claim. I was there the day the tax system failed.

>Claim it as a deductible! File it!

>No.

>Isildur!!!

>what is this new devilry?

A balrog. An accountant of the ancient world. This foe can audit any of you. RUN!

...

Shit meme.

...

>combining race posting and taxposting

This is quite potent.

Never thought I'd invest in a fixed term bond
>How about in a ISA?
Aye, I could do that.

>My employer, H&R Block, bids thee welcome!

>I can pay a lower tax rate if I wish, but to avoid taxes entirely, that is a rare gift

TAX-A-TION!
File 'em, dodge 'em, stick it to the Jew!!!

>Loan me.
>...what?
>I cannot raise the capital, you'll have to loan me!
>...!! Don't tell the (((Elf)))
>Not a word.

>The taxes are high my lord
>Pay them all down

They're taking the assets to Isengard!

This

ABANDON YOUR WEALTH
FLEE YOUR PROPERTY FOR YOUR LIVES

>Confound it all, Samwise Gamgee! Have you been day trading?
>I ain't been tradin' no days sir, honest. I was just diversifying my portfolio, if you'll follow me.
>A little late for cooking the books, don't you think?
>I heard raised prices.
>What did you hear? Speak.
>N-nothing important. That is, I heard a good deal about a dip, and a deflationary period, and something about the end of the Fed, but...Please, Mr. Gandalf, sir, don't audit me. Don't invest my stocks into anything...unprofitable.

Kekd

Full fan made Sup Forums taxposting dub of Lord of the Rings when?

How did Aragorn pay for the ghosts?

>tfw too retarded to understand even basic finance and tax stuff

I have no idea what I am going to do when my parents don't take care of all that stuff for me

Best one yet.

It's alright user, it's not that difficult to understand as long as you put in a little effort. You'll be fine

someone post the original so I can die in peace

We can go deeper

>taking Accounting 101
>starting to get a good portion of the jokes
feels good, man

he borrowed against minas tirith

>a little effort
That's figuratively the hardest part of pretty much everything. Wanna get fit, a girlfriend, job, house, better at X thing? Just put a bit of effort into it and you'll be that much closer to achieving your goal. Problem is it's hard to get motivated to put in that effort.

Yeah, but unlike getting fit, getting a job, or a girlfriend, researching basic finances and taxes is literally just a google search away. It's as little as "a little effort" gets

...

>tfw finance degree but not creative enough to meme it

All this underage

Those mainstream news parodies and refugeeswelcome edits were the best

Oh fuck you, I nearly choked to death

...

>mfw it's the first of the month

kek

Nigga you're gonna be doing a 1040EZ online, it's luddite proof.

wrong movie.
Right.

>Then turning to the herald Feanor cried: "Say this to the Manwe Sulimo, High Accountant of the IRS: if Feanor cannot foreclose on Morgoth at least he delays not to fine him, and sits not idle in audit.

This is the good shit mang

>build me a tax plan worthy of mordor

...

FILE, YOU FOOLS!

It this was Fox news it would be BUY GOLD, YOU FOOLS

Filing taxes is easy user. Unless you're a millionare, it's all pretty self explanatory.

Did GRRM ever even mention taxes in ASOIAF?

Tyrions whore penny tax or something

I hope we reach the point where we can just rewrite the entire movies in tax speak

Ironbank subplot. I think people get to fixated on the tax thing instead of the actual "yeah but with most of Gondor destroyed how did he pay and fee the remaining people"

Hello user, I'm 30+ here and I'd like to give you some sensible advice on the topic.

I recommend that you talk to your parents and express an interest in doing your own taxes, with their assistance, so that you can learn to start doing it for yourself. Doing your own taxes is a complex adult task (yes, even when the return itself is dead-simple) because it requires you, the average user, to keep track of a few things.

I started doing my own taxes in my early 20s and I leaned heavily on my mummy to help me. I still regularly call her with a question or two every tax-time (it's more to compare notes these days since we both understand the basic cycle and the accounting processes as far as we're concerned), but now I've branched out into more complex things like the investment schedules for myself, un-ticking the right boxes for my rent refund (got this recently), and even getting an exception for being uninsured for a few months, so as not to take a penalty under Obamacare.

If you worked a regular job of some kind at any point during 2017, one of the most important papers you can get is called a W-2. This is an official tax document that your employer must provide to you by the end of January of the next year (whether you're still working there or not), which summarizes your earnings, tax info etc. this is 80% of what you'll probably need-assuming you were even working!

I personally recommend Turbotax. Mummy and I have used it for over a decade, and I've done things a little different year-by-year, and I've never had any serious problems with the software (though it isn't perfect).

tears

There's a part in the books where the dwarves rebuilt the gates of minas tirith, i think it's implied that everybody pooled together to help the most affected kingdoms at the end.

Probably the best one.
Thank you user!

Nerd

...

>The point is conceded. Will you defer your motion to allow a commission to explore the validity of your accusations?

>Saruman: Sauron has regained much of his former liquidity. He cannot yet take corporative form, but his greediness has lost none of its potency. Concealed within his skyscraper, the CEO of Mordor sees all. His audits pierces policy, appeals, collaterals and taxhavens. You know of what I speak, Gandalf? A great Accountant lidless and wreathed in flame. He is gathering all equity to him. Very soon he will adjust a mutual fund-portfolio great enough to match the underlying securities of Middle-Earth.
>Gandalf: You know this? How?
>Saruman: I have seen it.
[Gandalf and Saruman enter another chamber. Upon a plinth sits an object covered in dark cloth]
>Gandalf: Algorithmic trading is a dangerous tool, Saruman.
>Saruman: Why? Why should we fear to use it?

Arise! Arise, Bankers of Theoden! Stocks shall be shaken, contracts shall be splintered! A crash day... a black day... ere the market opens! Bid now!... Bid now!... Bid! Bid to ruin and the market's ending! Debt! Debt! Debt! Debt! DEBT! Debt! Forth, Eorlingas!

>And which investments do you back?
>Investment? I invest in no company, for nobody invests in mine, little auditor. Nobody cares for non profit anymore.
>We are not Auditors. We are accountants!
>Accountants? Never heard of an Accountant before. Sounds like IRS mischief to me.
>They come with files, they come with taxes. Fining, breaking, investigating, charging. Penpushers and Pennypinchers. Curse them!
>No! You don't understand. We are Accountants, financial inspectors. Tax Dodgers!
>Maybe you are, and maybe you aren't. The Director will know.