You here alone sir?

You here alone sir?

That depends, what time do you get out?

Shut up, you're the one who works here. Let me watch my movie without having to listen to your shit.

That's nice, ma'am, but may I inquire where Robert is this night?

no
*unzips dick*

>Yes, everyone in my family died recently. They were in a car accident. I wanted to kill myself so many times but I couldn't . I'm not sure why. I started watching some Kino online and on the TV. I'm a changed man. I am alone because I don't carry grief anymore. I also want some more butter on my popcorn

Where is Robert? He is my usual popcorn man and I like to throw some business his way.

No one told you, sir? Robert.. instructed me to give this to you before he left..

>hands you small letter

always

can you read it for me? I cant read cursive

“The dozen crab leg kino-bundle is on sale today. Purchase wisely.”

Serious question. Has anyone here ever actually gone alone? I doubt the theater staff judge but I'd hate to bump into chad and his gf.

"go to the kinoplex, flick cinemas is done"

I see movies alone because I'm in a long-distance relationship and have Moviepass. I saw American Assassin by myself last night in a megaplex full of Chads and Stacies who didn't give a fuck, and neither did I.

I've worked in a cinema. If you don't act weird, nobody gives a fuck.

Unless you look like Brad Pitt, this is an example of weird.

Kek

for me

"Nice hat faggot"

No, I came with my waifu

it reads:
>right behind you, sir.

Why is there a zipper on your dick?

"I ordered the crab legs insolent swine"

>Go buy a ticket online
>See this

What do?

It reads
>"Behind you."

>flirting is weird unless you're really good-looking
How do you propose everyone else get laid?

My Tulpa wife Twilight Sparkle is with me.

Get an end seat with another open seat between you and an unavailable seat. No one will buy the open one.

Buy a ticket from a different theater

Buy two tickets for a nice comfy couch to yourself

...

be careful what you ask for

Then she has to pay too

haha uhh, M-Maybe you want to see the m-movie with me haha?

Select all squares with street signs

If there are none, click skip

No, I brought my dakimakura with me.

No girlfriend? heh

I used to work at a theater and people came alone all the time, and it wasn't always loser looking people. Sometimes you would get like moms and stuff who are waiting for their kids to get done with some appointment or something, sometimes a black chad who just wants to see some movie etc.

I used to think there was a stigma but apparently normal people just do it.

Last time I tried to slip past the no singles policy, I was kept in the popcorn mines for 5 years

I go all of the time.
I go to the matinee because it's cheap and somewhat empty.

I never felt like anyone was judging me

Anyone ever tried taking their poni gf to the kinoplex? I want to but I'm worried they won't let us inside and my severe acute autism doesn't let me do confrontation. I just can't

"Dear user,

I recently got offered the job of my dreams serving crab legs to kinogoers in Paris, France. I knew I wouldn't be able to say goodbye to you face to face, so I had to do it in writing. Leaving behind the kinoplex was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, but I just couldn't pass this once in a lifetime career opportunity.

Yours, Robert B. Schwarz

Ps. Did you know that popcorn here is called 'le popcorn'? Crazy huh?"

just give me my popcorn stacy, you fucking bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Front row all the way to the left

Yup.

Back center, right under the projector. Nobody behind you whose view you will block, back row has more leg room and the top row is raised up more than normal so even if there's someone tall enough for me to have trouble seeing over the extra height means he'd have to be about 8 feet tall before he caused problems for me.

You have a service animal?

not worth the risk imo

The Chad Pick-Up
The Virgin Flirt

Good job, user! You managed to distinguish the lines correctly and are ready to attempt to pick up a girl on your own now!

I go alone, I am alone and Im fat. I keep my headphones until the movie starts.

Multiple times. I enjoy good movies better when I'm alone. Otherwise if it's shit like beauty and the beast or (((zootopia))) I watch it with the lady.

God I hate when good looking people are serving me.

Good luck finding friends who dont exclusively want to see garbage films. I havent managed it yet.

Just go at an off-peak time. I went to see mother in the early afternoon and there was only two other people there, both alone as well.

...

I did a few weeks ago and pretended my friends were already inside, it was fucking horrible. I didn't think I would be the only single person in the theater at noon on a Monday, the place was filled with couples.

I go alone more often than not now, never felt judged. It's just a meme.

>"I get off whenever I feel like it, sir"
*unzips dick*

I want to make a hire a friend app so people can go to places that require a second person. It'd be like Uber, and it would require the person to be of the same gender or if they want a opposite gender friend they have to pay extra for a chaperone to shadow them; i'm no pimp afterall

>literally adding that he's in a long distance relationship so that people don't think he's single

How pathetic are you? You act like a woman adding pointless information for your own ego.

No girl likes to be flirted with while she's working because she can't flat out tell you to go away and has to pretend to be nice and laugh at whatever stupid shit you say.

Do you know how I know you're lying?
>I saw American Assassin by myself last night in a megaplex full of Chads and Stacies
That movie did shit.

"My darling user, my little bon-bon. I have been in love with you since the second I saw you. You stole my heart and you took it with you."

>not going alone
It's not like you're going to talk

>son of a bitch stole my line

Never speak to me or my clan again, thot

Going to the movies alone in the afternoon is max comfy. Cheapest prices and quite often you can just have your pick of the seats because there's literally nobody else there.

>No singles policy, kid.
B-but I w-wanna see Home Alone, it's f-for kids!
>Hey I don't make the rules, but I'll tell you what, you follow me into this bathroom for a while and I'll make sure they know you aren't single anymore.
O-okay lady, but I want a bag of popcorn this time.

I hate going to the movie theater alone and bumping into a flock of stacies talking about chad and tyrone. The only thing that makes me feel better is also bumping into robert but sometimes he just isn't there when I need him

>the virgin passive-aggressiveness
>the chad assertiveness

delete this

W..where's Tyrone??!

Yes I've gone to movies alone. Never gotten looks from people. I feel a bit jealous when I see friends together at the movies but I forget about it once the lights are off.

>buy ticket in the middle
>Chad and Stacy in your assigned seat flirting and kissing each other

What do?

I usually go alone because my friends only want so see dubbed movies

Apparently China already has a "hire a white guy" app for business and social purposes.

Who would be best director for /tv™ Kinoplex Universe™?

>everyone here is foreveralone like me

They weren't all there to see that.

>captcha solver takes more than 30 minutes to solve storefront captcha to start the movie
>popcorn got stale
>soda got warm
>baby stops crying
Why don't they choose competent people to do this shit?

Yeah, the best feeling is going a movie and the theater is nearly empty.

I legit smile when I see an empty theater, feels great. I can stand up and walk around a bit when I get stiff, fuck around in my seat, text a friend if there's something about the movie I think would be interesting to them, it's fantastic.

I'll...I'll never forget you, Robert...

Protip: nobody gives a fuck about you

Then why do you feel the need to constantly comment on people's heights/hairlines/weight? You do care about other people, it's just very negative because you're a negative person

I usually pick a back row seat and constantly check it to see if anybody else has bought tickets and if they pick one too close to me I refund the ticket and don't go

I go in the mornings and it's usually older people who are alone too so I don't mind it at all

Underrated post

Y-you're kidding, right Robert?

Went alone once in the middle of the day.
It was then that I noticed how many people went to the kinoplex alone. Would do it again t b h.

I went once a few weeks ago, it was a late showing on a weekday and the theater was half-full. I got a seat in the middle of the theater, popcorn and all. I don't think anybody gave me weird looks, though I think I've heard two guys behind me saying something among the lines of "it takes balls to go alone", dunno if they were talking about me or unrelated stuff.
Are people reall that scared of being judged by strangers that they're afraid of going to the movies alone?

You dont buy a seat for your Falcon?

I hate that "society" forces me to have "friends" , I want to watch alone I want to eat alone why do I need to be surrounded by people when I go out ? What is up with that kind of thinking ?

no you're here too miss

Why not like Tinder where it's free? You fucking Jew.

90% of the time I go alone so I don't have someone asking me questions about the movie next to me, no one has even noticed never mind cared, but then again I'm not an American so maybe the daily spree shooter singles you out for being a single to save you from the judgemental glances

y..you too

>"I'm already out...under the counter"

>*reveals pillow*
>"not today ma'am, two tickets please!"

Not really if her voice was in a certain way. The question can be done out of pure being nice but it can also be used as a flirt starter, unless in completely serious tone it would be rather unusual for her to ask you this question which signalises at least slight interest in you. Though if you should directly respond this severe flirty or first start more sensitive to carefully see if she really has some interest in you is subject to interpreation.

perhaps we could do something about that?