Transformers

Just downloaded this because I thought the animation looked awesome.
Will I get what's going on if I haven't watched the show?

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There is an opening narration that tells you everything you need to know.

It is a generic good vs evil story; anyone can follow it.

It was just an excuse to have robots kill each other. And it's the last thing Orson Wells ever did.

I've never watched the show but love the movie, it's simple enough for you to get what's going on as long as you have a basic concept of what Transformers is about.

Fucking love this movie.

The stuff that won't make sense in the movie won't make sense even if you watched the first 2 seasons of the cartoon that led up to it.

>WTF are the Quintessons and why do they do any of the things that they do?
>WTF is Unicron and where did he even come from and why does he hate the Matrix?
>WTF is the Matrix and where did it come from because no one ever mentioned it before?

All those things were made up for the movie and didn't get explained until the season that came after the movie. So you're fine jumping into the film completely cold.

Yeah, great movie
Hopefully it gets you to watch the show as well, but probably not since it had significantly less impressive animation

Watch GI Joe the Movie after this. It's the ideal double feature.

I think the movie takes place 20 years or so after the tv show, it's fine.

He won't feel bad about all those dead Autobots, if so inclined anyway.

I find it crazy that this was the last film Orson Welles ever made. Dude kinda deserved better..

Voicing a giant alien robot planet that has an ego larger than the stars and devours other planets?

He never had it so good, or so accurate.

Elvis is Primus

Autobots good. Decepticons bad. There, you're set, have fun.

...point taken

All you need to understand is that they're instruments of destruction

The animated Transformers movie is a 90 Minute Vince Dicola animated music video.

Just kick back and enjoy it OP!

get ready for a top tier 80's movie

Uh huh.

You ain't nuthin' but a Hound.

the autobots are kinda lame, id rather watch a movie about megatrons transformation into galvatron

...

A fucking amazing 80's movie, with a balls out rockin' soundtrack.

The narration is only is some versions.

One shall stand, one shall fall

Arcee will be your robo-waifu

Huh. I've never seen a version without it.

"It is the year 2005..."

Man, fuck Arcee.

Half the one-shot femmebots from that one episode where all hotter than her. Arcee's only asset is notoriety.

>Moonracer is my robo-waifu, all year, every year

The GI Joe movie was absolute shit aside from the amazing opening.

And now I realize I should have spoilered all of that since OP said he hadn't seen it. I'm not at all used to being careful when it comes to movies from the 80s.

Spoilers, but Ironhide was one of my favorites in the cartoon and they straight up executed him. And Prowl, Brawn AND Ratchet. It was like a scene out of the damned Godfather, in a kids' cartoon!

Starscream was my favorite period and he got straight fucking obliterated. Probably the most brutal shit I'd seen at that point in my life.

Optimus Prime had an entire scene where he passes away in a hospital.

I fucking LOVED it. I love that movie.

As a Soundwave fan, I applaud that this movie game him a catchphrase.

I used to rent the movie religiously from the local video store, but didn't watch it for good 20 years after that. I recently came back to it fearing the film might have aged poorly or perhaps sucked the whole time without my tiny child brain knowing but, surprise, it was better than I remembered.

That narration is in all versions.

I thought you were talking about the opening Star Wars-esque crawl that explains the whole thing. On some versions that's in place of the opening credits.

You forgot to mention how they had a memorial to all the dead Autobots which they later rammed into a sun.

It's been almost 30 years since I first saw this film, but man, this opening still gives me chills.

Has any other Sup Forums related villain ever had an introduction as impactful as this? Unicron just floats through space to one of the most ominous, yet mellow pieces of music ever written, a proceeds to just inhale an entire planet of living beings, tearing it apart and sucking into that glowing mouth. And there was absolutely nothing anyone could do about it. One guy just barely escapes, and the others that tried to flee just get sucked in anyway.

And he never says a word. No grand speeches, no proclamations, he just shows up and eats everyone.

I can't think of any other villain that made their standing as an utterly overwhelming cosmic force known in such a direct manner.

...

Forgot pic.

Everyone has the 30th Anniversary edition right? With the 4k restoration?

Watching the little documentary on the blu-ray they say that the koreans, or whomever, that did all the backgrounds actually did them in too fine a quality for back in the day. So the blu-ray literally has a better picture than seeing it in theaters back in 1986.

This aged well.

I'll tear out your optics!

>AFTER ALL IS SAID AND DONE

I sounded like some kind of super shill there. My bad.

BAD COMEDY

Shilling for Transformers the Movie and G1 is shilling for the Lord, son. Continue to proselloutize with my blessing.

>DARE! DARE TO BELIEVE YOU CAN SURVIVE!

I love that the catchphrase is still used
youtube.com/watch?v=5Lu6_8RsuNc

this is our future, this is titan coming back around.

I bet these scenes were animated by Toei. No way it was done by a non-Japanese studio.

The eric idle shit ruined the whole movie.

>GUILTY OR INNOCENT?
>INNOCENT

>Renting the movie on VHS
It's been a long time


ITS THE END OF THE ROAD
GALVATRON

The best part was that no one died during the entire run of the TV Show up until that point, then they killed so many characters in the Movie.

Remember when all of the 'bots dying scared so many kids they pussied out of killing Duke in GI Joe?

Is it wrong that I memorized both The Touch and Dare, and sing along with them during the movie? Because if so, I'm never being fucking right again.

>I haven't watched the show?

It was my introduction to the show, so you will. It's easy to follow.
>Autobots and Decepticons still at war
>Optimus set up an earth base
>Megatron set up a space base
>Both sides gathered more forces

That's pretty much it.

His voice is the perfect Unicron voice, though. I hear it whenever Uni's in a comic.

Fucking pussies ruining my childhood. AND THEY'RE STILL DOING IT. When will the pussification end??

>I BELONG TO NOBODY!!

When you realize cartoons are aimed at children.

No, the entire soundtrack is top notch, I listen to it on a regular basis

More accurately they tried to aim the 1986 Transformers are more college aged fans. It didn't pay off financially and backfired even worse with the parents who took their little kids to see it.

After THAT they pretty much aimed for the kiddies. Even when TFP was well received by older fans Hasbro changed course and made their next show far more kiddified.

Doesn't the Weird Al song kinda stand out a little bit?

>Tfw can't listen to Death of Prime without getting a bit damp in the optics
>Tfw saying lines while singing along with the songs
>Tfw doing the whole "PRIME!" "ONE SHALL STAND, ONE SHALL FALL." "WHY THROW YOUR LIFE AWAY SO RECKLESSLY?" "THAT IS A QUESTION YOU MUST ASK YOURSELF, MEGATRON" during The Touch
>Tfw remember every lyric in every song

>Nobody summons Megatron
>Then it pleases me to be the first

The whole Eric Idle, Junkions shit stands out. It's fucking awful.

This is literally the worst fucking movie if you've ever watched the show, like I did.

For one thing, literally every single episode of the show was

>Shit happens
>DECEPTICONS, ATTACK
>Transformers fight
>DECEPTICONS RETREAT

Literally every single fucking episode.
Megatron was the worst leader, which was pretty apparent on the outset, but was also underlined by how literally
EVERY
SINGLE
ONE
of his underlings, minus Soundwave, Shockwave, and I think the constructicons (it's been a while, forgive me if my facts are muddy) basically questioned his leadership and belittled him at every turn.
Point is, the decepticons were fuck-ups through and through. After however long the series went, there was nothing left to fear about them

And then the movie starts with the Autobots losing SO FUCKING BAD that they're stuck on a single base in the middle of nowhere.

FUCKING WHAT

HOW

Why don't we get to see that shit?

In still amazed they had a completely out of nowhere musical number in the garbage planet and it was fucking great

Creation matrix was in the original Marvel comics in the first 10 issues, I think. The movie just made it an orb thing instead of a computer program module.

Fuck off.

Gee should've thought tv-budget children cartoon wouldn't be a magnum opus if the medium plus the movie had a shit ton of rewrites

No you

I don't care, I watched the show and I always only liked Decepticons (literally only had toys of Decepticons ever) so this movie was the shit to me, fuck Autobums, I love seeing them die in the intro of this movie

Also, from a meta standpoint....we all know why Decepticons always lost in the show, they had to or else the series would end because they'd kill everything. We also know why they were allowed to win in the movie, to make room for the new cast.

Law of averages senpai

The best part is all those characters who technically died, but didn't since the scenes depicting their deaths weren't in the film or got revived later for reasons. Gears was a casualty at one point, but that was in an earlier script.

-Shockwave: Unicron crushed him when he slammed his hand down on Cybertron
-Reflector trio: Same as Shockwave
-Coneheads: Seen in the film, but the show probably didn't get the memo, like the Insecticons
-Trailbreaker: His corpse is seen while the Decepticons retreat, but this was cut from the flim
-Mirage: After killing Bombshell (and yes, the scene confirmed he straight up killed him since it mentioned he was lifeless as he was carried to the shuttle), Megatron shot him. With Megatrons gun suddenly capable of killing folks, this isn't hard to believe. Since the scene was cut, it explains bombshell still being barely alive on the shuttle.
-Red Alert: Killed when he, tracks, and Ultra Magnus tried to take out Devastator, but was shot by the constructicons while retreating.

> The dialogue in the 80's kids cartoon is more adult than anything in Bay's movies.

Contrast:
"That's a question you should ask yourself Megatron"

With:

"Give me your face!"

That opening is Lovecraft as fuck.

>When you realize cartoons are aimed at children.
Oh, boo hoo. I WAS a child when I saw this!

I was like 10 the first time I watched Transformers the Movie in the 90s and it was fantastic! Why do we have to cater to the prissiest little bitch crybaby kids? I know there are still kids out there that cryo-freeze their action figures in a glass of water and say they were frozen in carbonite, or strap firecrackers to 'em because that toy died in battle.

Maybe if more cartoons didn't shy away from this sort of thing we wouldn't have the Barney the Dinosaur generation on their moral crusade today.

Shit, could we even get away with the last musical number of Brave Little Toaster today? I bet not. It's sad. Oh well, I'll always have the memories.

>4k meme

VHS master race

>TFw lost my VHS of this movie
Watching it in Blue Ray is nice
BUT IT'S NOT THE SAME

Fun fact: Simon Furman did his origin of Unicron in the UK Marvel comic without consulting Hasbro and just went and did it.

>-Coneheads: Seen in the film, but the show probably didn't get the memo, like the Insecticons
I thought they were just heavily damaged when Optimus sprayed them down, not shot to hell and gone like the Autobots in the shuttle.

It won't make sense even if you watched the show, but if you're watching it for plot you're watching it wrong.

They were, then you see jets with their colors fighting Unicron and being destroyed.

It's a quality film. I think it's a fine end for him honestly.

His bored disinterest perfectly fits a Lovecraftian ancient God who gives no fucks.

How like Welles to give a fantastic final performance in total spite of himself.

Okay, no, I'm not fucking done.

Imagine you're 12 in 1986. You're about to watch the Transformers movie. You love Transformers. You've bought all the toys you could. You can't wait to see what schemes Megatron will concoct, and what grand fights Optimus Prime will command.

It starts with new characters. You don't know who Hot Rod or Kup or Ultra Magnus are, but that's okay, the show brought in characters that were never mentioned before or since too. Whatever. So long as all the original gang is there, and lo and behold, they are!

Exactly long enough to get SLAUGHTERED TO FUCKING DEATH.
FUCKING EVERYONE
EVERY character you have ever loved and bought the toy of.
Killed in an unusually brutal manner.
Autobot and Decepticon alike. What the fuck is going on?
The movie's only barely started, and OPTIMUS PRIME IS FUCKING DEAD.
FUCK THIS SHIT.

By the end of the movie, you don't know who anyone is or what anyone is fighting for. Megatron is still there (Reformatted into Galvatron, but whatever), so you assume Optimus Prime is going to come back by the end of the movie too. Probably with an awesome new look, everything will be all right.

FUCKING NOPE.
THE FUCKING WHINY ASS KID ROBOT IS THE NEW LEADER.
WHAT THE FUCK.
NOT EVEN THE GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE HE'D FIT THE PART, THE SHITTY ASS SPEEDSTER.
FUCK.

It's okay though, Galvatron is still here, and--nope, he's now dead too.

It's alright, maybe they'll take the show in a new direction! Maybe the new toys are cool!

So we go over to the Toys R Us to see what the new characters look like, and yeah nope. Pic related.
Fuck this. Fuck everything. Half the fun of Transformers back then was that the robots turned into *real* cars and trucks (except for the ones that didn't, but whatever). What the fuck are these things? They all look like ass!

And that's the story of how I lost my innocence at age 12.

I don't know what you're talking about.

"Give Me your face" is one of the best lines ever uttered in any Transformers anything ever

See? This one survived. More kids would.

I was pretty much the same way, younger even when I saw this in the early 90s, and I couldn't have been more hyped at the direction they took. It's one of my fondest childhood moments. The thing that fucked me up was the end of Lufia 2.

Oh and Galvatron didn't die. He just got flung someplace.

In my incoherent rage, I forgot my pic.

The movie tie-in transformers were seriously, no hyperbole, some of the worst transforming robot toys ever made.

Things DID get better, and old characters did come back, and since then, there's been so many iterations of Transformers it's hard to feel anything when Optimus Prime dies anymore, but man, at that time, it fucking sucked.

Jesus. Literally worse than a Gobot. That's just sad.

I liked the direction the movie took, as a kid who saw it in the thearter. I also liked Rodimus and Hotrod.

Dave Willis, is that you?

I still have the VHS, DVD and now the blu-ray. It is superior.

All hail Megatron

> Be reading the second Transformers UK Annual.
> Read the comic stories and ignore the text only stories.
> Eventually read "State Games", thinking it will be meh.
> Mind Blown. It's awesome.
> That text story, tucked away in a TD annual, becomes one of the most influential parts of TF canon.

>Eh, what'd he say his name was?
>Galvatron.
>LONG LIVE GALVATRON! GALVATRON! GALVATRON!

And they had no fucking die-casts.

I fucking loved die-casts.

There was a kid at school who was the envy of everyone when he came in with Soundwave and showed it off.

Soundwave was hard to get in the UK so I was jealous as fuck.

My brother got Deceptions, I got Autobots, as we competed to build our armies.

In fairness, Michael Bay can only wrote at a 3rd grade level to begin with.

"Unicron, I've come to bargain."